pictures mask the pain

I'm done..at least for a week

2008-05-08T20:09:00.002-04:00

I just finished my Accounting final..and what this class has taught me is that if ever in the future I need to do accounting, I'll hire a professional! That being said, the semester is finally over, and to celebrate I am going to San Francisco for a week! The stars aligned and Ankas' work is having their annual conference out there all this coming week. So that means a free hotel room for Sam ;) Her job has thus far allowed me to trek to Boston, Chicago, Denver, and now San Francisco..pretty awesome. Even more awesome is that Stef is flying down from Seattle to hang out as well, so it should be a good ass time. Nothing really planned, so it should be a nice relaxing trip, with hopefully lots of pictures to come. The depressing thing is that summer classes start the 19th, so yeah...this week is needed. I am taking Environmental Law this summer, which may turn out to be pretty intense, being that it is three nights a week 7-10 for four weeks....so it can go both ways, lets hope the teacher knows how to handle a summer class like this.

I have been carless for a month now, and it has not been bad at all. On average the Metro/DASH trip adds about 15 minutes each way to my commute..not bad. It is actually pretty nice to not have to drive, especially since I started downloading podcasts...them shits are awesome! I have all my NPR shows, and a bunch more environmental based news podcasts to get me to and from work. Work is shitty per usual, but maybe that will be ending shortly. I got an e-mail from the GAO a few weeks back that said I was "minimally qualified" and that my application will move on to the second review stage....first time being minimally qualified was a good thing. They said they hoped to be in touch by the end of May...so we shall see. Tht would be awesome, and woudl be walking/biking distance from my house.

I guess that is about all for right now, I think Amsterdam Falafel is in the stars tonight, so I should probably get on that. Hope everyone is well.

Conclusion to Birthday Week...

2008-04-13T22:16:00.002-04:00

It is sunday night, I am about five and a half pages into a 15-20 page term paper due next Monday, listening to Pete Seeger...and thought it a good time to write about the rest of my birthday week.

Tuesday (My actual Birthday) At about 10:30am or so, my insurance company called me and let me know that my car was considered a "total loss" aka shit was totaled. Fortunately Honda's hold some value, my car was 8 years old, had 103k miles and they are giving me 1/3 of what I paid for the car new. While this is not enough to buy a car right now, it is definitely not that bad. The amount however has a bit of coincidental value.. on one hand, I could add it to what I have in my savings and I would be able to pay off all my credit card debt, with some change left over. On the other hand..if I were to be offered a job outside of my current company, I would be able to leave and pay back my tuition assistance they provided...if they asked for it back. Sooo I am just going to throw it into my savings account and see where things stand in December. I'll decide what would be best at that time. In the mean time, I have decided to go car-less from now on. One more step towards living in a way that represents my views. First was giving up meat, and now giving up my car. I know all of this has been shitty, but maybe good things will come from it. So the plan is, metro to eisenhower..catch the 35 cent transfer bus..and get to work. For my classes in fairfax, I'll borrow Anka's car once a week. Everything in the city, with exception to some places, I'll do with my bike. Sounds like a plan!

Tuesday night, Anka got a good group of kids together for a great Ethiopian dinner. The service was as shady as is usual, but I think that the conversation made up for the slowness ;) Thanks to all who made their way out for food and good times. A special thanks to Anka for the coordinating and vegan cheesecake.

Wed-Thurs- Work and school.

Friday: Went to Capitol Hill for work. Listened to some folks talk about the process of legislation. After listening I had mixed feelings, big shock, I was torn between looking into becoming a committee staffer on an environmental issue...or just give up on the whole US political system.. Bah. So at about 3:30 our group heads to Capitol City Brewery in Union Station and knock back a few...then we go to the Dubliner, knock back a few, then a smaller groups goes to Rocket Bar in Chinatown, knock back some more....I leave there at about 10:30..get stuck in a ferocious rainstorm on my bike...but eventually make it to the BlackCat to meet up with Greg and Alex to see Pig Destroyer. Bed!

Saturday: Had to go into work 9-1..that was rough. Came home napped, went to the police station to get the police report for my accident...the guys were charged with leaving and accident scene, driving under the influence, and carrying a pistol without a license. But it does look like they have insurance... so I may be getting out of having to pay any deductible, good news. After the PoPo station I peddled over to Dez's Birthday party and had a great time there.

Sunday: woke up and did some school work...Anka got back from Ocean City so when she got back we had some good quality time before she had to go dog-sit...and here I am...still listening to Pete Seeger...thinking about bed.

Overall, I have had better weeks, but maybe this whole accident fiasco is the catalyst for a new lifestyle...who knows? And I mean...I'll be good and in-shape in no time....may have to buy a new rear wheel to replace the one that got bent when the cab hit me last year...but thats not a biggie. Ah well, I'll keep this thing up-to-date on how the transition goes.

Song of the day:
Pete Seeger - Turn Turn Turn

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time for every purpose, under Heaven

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time for every purpose, under Heaven

A time to build up, a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time for every purpose, under Heaven

A time of love, a time of hate
A time of war, a time of peace
A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time for every purpose, under Heaven

A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time to love, a time to hate
A time for peace, I swear it's not too late

Birthday Weekend

2008-04-06T11:16:00.007-04:00

This is the story of my birthday weekend thus far, started out great, but hopefully reached its lowest point last night... but I'll get to that in a a few.

Friday:

Typical day at work, I was super busy and left plenty on my desk when I promptly left at 4. That night Anka and I went to see Les Savy Fav. If you do not know these guys, you definitely need to check them out. However, if you want to get the full effect you will need to go see them in person. As Anka noted to me, the band is really just a back-up for the lead singers wild antics. This guy is a good sized dude..bald....with a big burley beard..and was shirtless by song 3. From that point it just got crazy, from him dressing up in skin tight pants with an eagle head to him grabbing people in the front row and pushing their faces into his crotch..to him walking through the audience and dancing on the bar. I am not one for dancing all that much, but they had me indie kid dancing for sure...read that as switching my weight from leg to leg. See pictures below. And yes, his feet are actually on those girls heads.

Saturday:

Slept in, made some lunch..went to the gym..watched some Basketball. Fucking UNC got trounced, and lost the pool I was in with the kids at FSU. And Ben..if you ever read this, I hope Kansas burns in a fiery plane crash...fuckers. But the exciting news was that Steve was in Baltimore. So around 9:45 or so Anka and I drive up to Charm City to meet Steve for some beers. So we get there and the night progresses, luckily Steve's hotel was literally across the street..and like he said "it took me 30 seconds to get here, but it will take a minute and a half to get back" It turned out to be pretty interesting night, between douche bag stripper shirts, being transported back to a 1900's Inn just by going upstairs...learning that some people wear Liverpool jersey's just because they like Carlsberg... the coyote wrangler and his creepy scarf/poncho thing and not really wanting pizza after all. It was a good time as always, I just hope Steve doesn't have any alcohol in his blood when he goes to see the doctor Monday.

Saturday..late night:

So I'm drunk...Anka graciously drove me to and from Baltimore, knowing my intention was to drink. So we leave Baltimore at about 2am, and get back to DC close to 3. As we are looking for parking on our street, we pass my car..and I noticed some one had hit it while I was gone. You'll see pictures in a second... When I say hit, what I really mean is completely total the back drivers side of my car! So I'm like "Fuck, that really sucks, hit and run". So I am pretty bummed at this point, because my car is totally fucked and I knew I'd have to pay a shit ton for my deductible. So I am on the porch trying to figure out what to do, still buzzed of course, when a man approaches my yard. He tells us that he witnessed the accident, and was almost hit as well, but more importantly the people who hit my car were still at the end of my street! So we call 911 and report the whole ordeal. About 10 minutes pass, and the police show up and the guys are still up there trying to get their car to a place where they could drive away. We were all curious as to why they never left the car. Turns out the car was not stolen as we had thought, and the car traced back to the driver. But more importantly, the police found weed, coke, and a gun in their possession! So their asses got arrested, one of them tried to walk away, but the cops stopped him right across the street from us, handcuffed him and took him back to the scene. The good news I guess is that if the driver is insured, I'm not betting on it, I won't have to pay a deductible most likely, and if he is not insured, I will only have to pay a $200 dollar deductible. But I feel like the damage is extensive enough for them to claim my car "totaled" which will be shitty. I doubt I can find a good car like my honda for a couple grand I'm sure it is worth at this point.

Sunday:

I woke up, a little hung over, a little bummed about my car. But, my parents are heading in for lunch, so hopefully some good thai will make everything better. I just hope things get better from this point on.

A Year...wow

2008-03-15T22:34:00.002-04:00

So I was checking out Joey's blog just now, and realized that somehow I have not been able to get on here to write about happenings.. and in an hour and a half it would have been a year exactly since my last post. I thought it was a creepy coincidence...so why not write a post and let everyone that I am still alive, still busy, and still really lazy. Not news for most of you I'm sure. I doubt anyone even checks this blog anymore..but I guess I'll try to update it when trying to waste time between school work. That being said, I'll sum up the last year in one sentence...

I'm 20 some credits smarter, 30 lbs lighter, hates corporate american 100 times more, and am still having a great time in the city with my two favorite girls.

I'll expand on all of this soon..I promise.

I'm alive I'm alive

2007-03-16T13:26:00.000-04:00

I'll write about happening soon...i swear. In the meantime, my co-worker Dan wrote me a theme song....the kid is a genius. If you were ever curious as to what I do, read on.

(to the tune of “Ice, Ice, Baby”)

All right, stop! Collaborate and listen!

Sam is back with my brand new invention

Something, grabs ahold of me tightly

Spinnin’ like a disc drive daily and nightly

Will it ever stop? Yo, I don’t know.

Turn off the light, and it’ll glow.

To the extreme I rock the Force like Vadah

Unzippin’ files and spewing streams of data.

Dance! Carress the screen that looms

I’m killing those files like poisonous mushrooms

Deadly! When I’m playin’ ArcEditor

Flinging casualties aside like Schwarzenegger and Predator

Love it or leave it! You better gain weight!

You better buy Girl Scouts, ‘dem kids don’t play!

If there is a problem, yo, I’m the playa,

Sittin’ in my crib as the Guardian of Data!

(chorus with “Guardian!” “Of!” “Data!” instead of “Ice!” “Ice!” “Baby!”)

Now that St. Patty’s day is jumpin’!

With the bass kicked in and green beer is pumpin’

Quick to the drive to the drive no fakin’

Cookin’ CDs like a pound of fake bacon.

Burnin’ ‘em, like a wild west saloon,

Firing like Cheney at Rosalind’s balloons

And her snail! What a gross existence!

I’m on a roll, time to man the resistance!

Rollin’, like Pillsbury dough,

In my cubicled walls so my hair can’t blow

The girlies on standby waiting just to say high

Did ya stop? No, I winzipped by.

Kept on, unzippin’ to the next stop

I bust the files I’m heading to the next block

The block was dead, so I continued to

A1A! Eisenhower Avenue!

The girls were wearing “It’s So Magic” by M. Kay

Don’t you dare betray me. Et tu, brutè?

Jealous, I’m bored out of my mind.

Sam with the bike, Ace of Base with the sign

Ready, for the Delteks on the wall

Delteks acting nimble cuz they full of 8-ball

Fire alarm! Ringed out a loud whammy

Grabbed the popcorn out the ‘wave, all I heard was “Tammy!”

Fallin’! The bean bestows the crown.

Jumped in my car, and flew out of town.

Bumper to bumper, the avenue was packed,

I tried to get away before the data got jacked.

IT is on the scene, you know what I mean?

They took my stickers, cuz runnin’ all the files means

If there is a problem, yo, I’m the playa,

Sittin’ in my crib as the Guardian of Data!

(chorus)

Bow to me! Cuz I’m a lyrical poet,

My computer’s on the scene just in case you didn’t know it

With process! speed that’ll slow time down

Enough RAM on deck to put holes in the ground!

‘Cuz my task is like a chemical spill!

Features more files than you can vision and feel!

Unzipping the bytes is a hell of a concept!

You take a look, and you wanna step with this!

I know data like a sage,

I slice like a ninja, cut like a RAZR,

And so fast other computers say, “Damn!”

If mine was a gig I’d sell it by the gram.

Keep my composure while it’s puttin’ out steam

Magnetized by the output and the structure of its strings.

If there is a problem, yo, I’m the playa,

Sittin’ in my crib as the Guardian of Data!

(chorus)

“Yo, let’s get out of here.”

“We can’t – the office has no snow policy.”

Guardian of Data! Too cold, too cold! (repeat)

There always has to be one

2007-01-25T14:02:00.000-05:00

Last night I had my first Stats class of the semester. For some reason 3 Stat classes, guaranteed to be harder than this one, that I took at FSU were not good enough for me to get out of this class. I'm not at all angry... So this class, it meets every wednesday for 3 hours 7-10pm. After reading for my other class at the library I head over to the classroom. So I'm hanging out on the bench outside the door, and this girl walks up and sits down. This girl was straight out of 1986! I am no expert on fashion, and often have no room to talk, but you'll understand why I am being mean in a little bit. She had super pasty white skin, imagine a gamer living in his/her parents basement...she was not obese but definitely overweight by a good amount....glasses......had some long blonde hair with bangs.....was wearing some kind of chunky white sweater/pancho kinda deal, way too big........and some out of fashion faded jeans with cuffs rolled up, and the cuffs were red. Ok so now you have a mental picture of this girl.

So I'm reading some Howard Zinn, which spares me from her introduction. She was introducing herself to everyone who would listen, in this robotic stiff handed kind of way. "Hello, I'm (insert name), it is very nice to meet you" like she has been practicing this very speech for weeks, hoping to perfect it when she finally gets to put it to use. So at this point I realize something is a little off with this girl, but ya know at that point I just thought she had bad taste in clothes and a bit socially awkward, no biggie. Then she started talking and just spouting some facts, to people who had better information. She was going on about how she used to be in teaching and how PA schools were so good...blah blah, to this girl getting her M.S. in education. When the girl tried to contradict the girl, her response was always "wellllll not really...you see....." At this point I knew I had to keep my distance.

So GMU fucked up with the SPSS license and it was not working on the classroom computers, the teacher explained this at the beginning of class, which half the class was not there for because the VCU vs GMU basketball game was occurring next door in the patriot center, so no one could find parking. Once we start using the software some procedures were not accessible because of the fuck up. So a girl sitting next to the girl in question made a comment about how the features did not work...this is how the conversation went.

Girl 1: Professor, that function is not showing up on my PC
Crazy: Thats because the license is not working
Girl 1 : Well everything else is fine
Crazy: turning red, talking straight ahead, not at girl, and hands shaking WELLLL That is because the license does not work...the professor at the beginning of class SAID THAT....and then she gets overshadowed by Dr Balint.

She turned into the impatient huffy puffy fat kid know it all!!!! I know you have all experienced this, this form of impatience is like nothing I have ever seen or can comprehend. I mean, the other girl was not there when the problem was explained, I do not understand why the crazy girl expected her to know what was wrong. And the crazy girl even did the annoying know it all sigh after freaking out on this poor girl, and looked to me like she actually needed some time to calm down after her expenditure of know-it-allness. I kinda wish it kept going, cause it would have gone to blows, it was one of those situations where you could actually feel the awkwardness in the air!!! And she used the word whimsical in class....when was the last time you heard the word whimsical in Stats??? Who the fuck says that in any class outside of poetry, music, or creative writing?? My real problem with her kind of people is that they are the ones who become physically and verbally annoyed when someone asks questions or needs more explaining...this is not cool, some people take a little longer. And I have a feeling she doesn't know everything about everything. So hopefully this crazy chick will not act up anymore, for all our sakes. If she does...we may...as a group..have to take away her season pass to the renaissance fair.

Like a parasite I wanna kiss you till you puke

2007-01-23T10:35:00.000-05:00

Keeping with my resolution, I am back on this cold ass morning to rant, report, and rave.

First and foremost, the evil folks at websense are getting smarter. I used to be able to use a proxy server to access myspace at work, but they thwarted that plan. And now it seems that they have added livejournal to their list of sites they don't want me to see. I mean, the only one I have bookmarked at work is Courtney's, and her writings are no security threat! These evil people are making my job more and more difficult with each passing day. As long as my porn site is not blocked, I can at least stay sane. If they end up blocking that site as well, there will be serious repercussions!!! I still think the most ironic thing about all of this, is that I can get to blogger.com to write a blog, but cannot open my blog to see it! Fucking ridiculous! *Edit..so today I come into work, and the bastard trolls have blocked Fark too! Sweet Jesus!

Sunday, the District finally saw some snow. It was not much, but some did stick, and it took a few minutes to clean the car before work. Cookie, whom never ceases to surprise me, actually liked it. I have never had a boxer who liked playing in the snow. Anka actually got her to catch snowballs mid-air. This hidden talent of hers was displayed to me Monday after I got home from class. Her ear infection is in check, and she seems much happier than she was a week ago. She is also sleeping the whole night through these days, in her bed on the floor, which is a good thing. Our bed is fine with Anka+Cookie...Sam+Cookie....Anka + Sam....but is not ok with Cookie+Anka+Sam. Mostly because cookie is a bed hog.

So Sunday, Anka and I went to the Rock &Roll Hotel to see the Queers. Ok I guess I should re-phrase that, I went and saw the Queers...Anka came along because I bought her the ticket and she was being really sweet. I had never seen them before, so I had to go. It brought back memories of high school...the good ones of course. Laserquest..capitol ballroom...metro cafe....the admirals inn....if you were there, then you know what I'm talking about. A surprising amount of kids showed up for the show, being it was a Sunday night, snowing, and not in the best part of DC. They played for a long ass time, we dipped out before they were finished, but when we left they showed no signs that they were going to be done anytime soon. They are pretty simple, always goofy, and provided a good show for the likes of this old timer.

On to R&R Hotel....

I liked the place, simple as that. Though there are some bugs they need to work out. The show space is about the size of the backstage at the Blackcat, and at first I didn't see how they could compete for bands with such a small space, then Anka brought up the point that not many shows at the Blackcat sell out, and many that are on the main stage could be housed in the backstage. However! If the Hotel is going to compete, they need to invest in some better Sound Equipment, and a more competent sound guy. Half of the time, the mics did not work, or the level were not high enough, and when the mics were on, the guitar/bass/drum levels were way too high. There is also a lack of acoustic enhancements in the actual "concert area", which is fine for a DIY basement show, but if you want to be a competitive venue and have bands come back, you need to make shit a bit more professional. Bar downstairs was big, and had good beer...and strongbow, thats a plus. And Schlitz for all you frugal folks. The upstairs was pretty rad though, another good size bar, pool table, jukebox, and plenty of old thrift store couches that give it that 1940's hotel feel. Lots of velvet reds and blacks, and lots of wood. The upstairs also has several room separated off, which from my understanding can be rented for private parties and such. Overall I was impressed by the place. It looks like red sparrowes and Mono will be playing there in a coupe few...so my return is imminent.

The Dust is Settling

2007-01-19T14:03:00.000-05:00

Well it has been awhile since I posted on here, I have two resolutions for the new year 1) to post on here on a more frequent basis and 2) to keep a log of all the concerts I go to this year. Both are quite realistic, which makes for a more attainable goals. That being said I guess I will start by going over the happenings.

I guess the biggest event has been my moving. For those who were not aware of this, at the beginning of January i packed my stuff and headed a few miles north to NW DC, Shaw to be more specific. Anka and I had talked about us moving in together for quite some time, and after a few months everything fell into place. Anka's roomate Crystal and her two adorable puppies moved to Brooklyn to persue a graduate internship, and I took over her lease. And ta da! I'm living in DC. It is acute little row-home around the corner from U St. Even more awesome however is the central location of our place to everything in DC, it is a 5 minute bike ride to the Blackcat, less to the 9:30 club, and DC9 is a couple minutes by foot. The place is small, but how much room do two people need anyways?? We have been working hard over the past few weeks to get everything unpacked and such, and I'd say things are 90% done. Still have to hang some stuff, and get the bike rack in place. That being said Anka and I will be having people over in the near future. Cookie (the pup) is always bitching at us, she thinks that we are embarrassed to introduce her to our friends. She's just like a child, I swear. So yeah, I'll get around to taking pictures of the place soon enough, and will surely post them on here.

School starts again Monday, and I am actually looking forward to it. I ended up getting A's in both classes last semester, not totally shocking, but since they were both topics I've never had any exposure too, I'm a bit proud. This semester I'm taking Organizational management theory, and a stats class. I am none too thrilled that I have to take more Stats, after the courses I took at FSU...but thats what they require, and it didn't seem like I had much wiggle room in the matter. So classes are Mondays and wed 7:20-10....I guess that is the only shitty part really. I'm always ass tired by the time I get home. My stats prof is my major advisor though, he is the head environmental science guy in the dept. Hopefully we will have some time to talk, and plan some stuff out together. I need to talk with him, maybe give him my interests and see what direction he would suggest me taking.

Work is the same per usual. Still working as a FEMA sub-contractor, and still have a lot of responsibility. Imagine that. If you ever really want to know what I do, just ask and I will try to explain it. I am however getting more varied assignments as of late. And have been asked to participate on a committee that will deal with government legislations affecting our work, so that is pretty rad. Should help out with the MPA.

Stef's wedding is approaching with the quickness, and should be good times. I have seen the dresses, and been privy to all of the planning, and it should be an awesome time. Anka and I have been asked to be DJ's at the reception, so you know we'll make that good times. We are also getting the grooms cake for them from CakeLove.....delicious. That will be our gift to them...which seems appropriate from two foodies. Gotta get fitted for a tux next weekend with my dad...now for those who know my dad....how awesome is this going to be? I'm willing to sell tickets to this event if anyone is interested.

The cookie monster is settling in with us. She is in need of some obedience in some areas, but from working with her thus far, she is a fast learner, so I don't think it will be too too much of a problem. She is still scared of the 'Hood though...she will not go on a long walk unless Anka and I are with her together. Kinda cute, but lends to problems when we are trying to get her burn off some energy alone. I'm sure she is going to be the most spoiled dog of all time.

So I guess that is the major stuff..just sprinkle road trips to philly..richmond, some shows, some movies, some drinking, darts, pool etc.... in there and that is what has been going on as of late.

As stated above I'll try to write on some shit more often, I'm sure I'll stumble across lots of people watching and commentary living in the city.

Cheers for now,

Sammy

I can't believe that some people still do not get it

2007-01-18T17:50:00.000-05:00

So I was doing my usual drive home today, nothing unusual really...zoning a bit whatever. As I am exiting onto Mass Ave a Toyota Land cruiser is in front of me, for those who do not know these were one of the original bigger than you will ever need SUV's. The driver had the audacity to have "friend of the Chesapeake" license plates and even worse had chspeak written out on the plates. I hope you see the ridiculousness of this combination. Fucking people.

Does anyone remember StoryBook Land???

2006-11-07T10:02:00.000-05:00

So as promised in my last lil entry, I have found some time to sit down and review the Decemberists show that I attended on the 30th.

In a super quick summary, the show was awesome. Their newest full-length "The Crane Wife" is named after an old Japanese folk tale about altruism, love, greed, loss, regret...pretty much in that order. Being consistent to the cd, the stage was adorned with a full backdrop with a Hokusai like village represented. The actual stage was decorated with large red paper lanterns. The show itself lasted for 2 hours or more, and never lost the crowds attention. From the pre-show introductions "please turn to your left, and introduce yourself to your neighbor" to round like sing alongs divided by physical location within the 9:30 club. The group also did an ample job of mixing up new and old songs, so die hard long haul fans were as pleased as the newbies. They didn't play California One..much to Brozy's disdain, but his anger was quickly quelled. I have yet to hear "grace cathedral hill" live, but I mean maybe someday, right??

On to the Music!

Ok, so everyone has heard of them, some love them, others dread listening to them, some idolize them, others think their overrated. But when all the dust clears, you are left with 5 or so young musicians playing music, and having fun doing it. After listening to a few songs, one becomes aware that this is not your ordinary top 40 indie rock. I mean, when was the last time K-fed wrote a song that required multiple trips to the webster dictionary?? There songs are only rivaled, in my experience, by greg and the boys of bad religion. And I think this intelligent writing style is the essence of what they are trying to achieve. They are going out on quite the limb, working to tie together the folks styles popular in the 50's-70's with melodic musical stylings. Unlike the National, the Decemberist lyrics are not so much first person autobiographical pieces, there are few songs that you can listen to and be like " yeah i've been there", if you can...well you have a more interesting life than me. Their lyrics represent more storytelling, some from the first person, but the vast majority from a third person experience. And I said that one cannot always relate directly to the stories told, however on a more metaphorical level, one can pick pieces that are significant and there lies the connection. One must pick apart their lyrics, often requiring definitional help, to discover the messages being conveyed to the audience. There is also a common theme of their music being timeless, meaning that some of the stories are obvious to have happened in years past, but the emotions expressed are just as valid today as they ever were. This in my opinion, is an important goal that many bands often fail to account for. Many groups write music intended for short term success, that lacks any kind of staying power. The Decemberists seem to write songs that they know will never be a top 10, but, can be enjoyed with equal content years from now. Their music also has a special place with me because of the morbid,macabre nature of many of their lyrics. I am definitely not an overly depressed or misanthropic, but I do accept that the world is an ugly place. Fortunately, the Decemberists style is seamless with telling stories that instill images of death, despair, and pain.

So on to the obvious deal maker or breaker, Colin Meloy. Unfortunately, a lot of folks cannot get passed the vocal qualities of Colin. There is no doubt that his voice is distinctive, and is described by some as being too nasal. However, with the deliberate vibrato, and emphasized linguistic accents, his style is not far off from the period singers of early america. I have acquired the Tarkio cd's, Colins college band in Montana, and his voice has changed a great deal, which lead me to believe that he has chosen to use his current stylings, as they seem fit for what the Decemberists are trying to achieve. On a deeper musical level, Colin has an amazing range and even in his live performances hits the high range with no strain, and with very little fluctuation in pitch quality. And watching him perform, one can see that he has experience with projection. This culminates to a consistently excellent performance on his part. Many singers that I have seen live, often drop octaves from what was recorded on the album. And I suppose it is better to do this then sing a "sour" note, but I mean it is like taking a piece of music, and changing what the composer wrote, to make it easier...it is sorta cheating. Colin is also proficient in hitting arpeggios that correspond with the key he is singing in, adding musical accents to extended notes that are often sat on by many singers. Colin is also responsible for writing the lyrics, which in itself is quite an impressive accomplishment. The most impressive thing about his lyrics are how descriptive they are. Like many good writers, the lyrics allow the the listeners escape to the places sung about. I would list some examples, but really every song by the Decembersits send you to different places. Stories of love, prostitution, murder, death, runaways, political activism, war, and many other topics are discussed at some point within their music. To be able to accomplish such a feat is a difficult task, and Colin has mastered it with apparent ease.

The Decemberists will never be confused as a highly technical, mathematical band. They do not run up and down scales in triplet patterns, or shred, or even experiment with abstract modal scales. But, they do not really need to. Unfortunately for many, the vocals are enough for some to never sit down and take in the musicality that the band presents with every song. This simplicity is what makes them unique, and is what ties them to the folk revolution discussed earlier in this entry. This does NOT however, mean that the members are not gifted musicians. What they do, they do well. They are a prime example of how many simple musical parts, when played over one another, forms a beautiful wall of sound. It is pretty hard to describe without having one listen to it for themselves. Their music to me is more closely related to orchestration, than the traditional 2 guitars 1 bass, and a drummer. But when one considers the instruments utilized (guitar,banjo,violin,viola,drums,electric bass,stand up bass,lap steel,tambourine,accordion,rhodes piano,synth keyboard,electric mandolin,and some things I've never even seen) it does resemble more of an orchestra then a typical indie band. And as one learns in music, it is often more important to play things with feeling and purpose than it is to play loud, fast, and hard. The chords used in the Decemberists music are not complex, but they use them in progressions that make them emotionally powerful. And of course they do very well with changing tempos, dynamics, and musical transitions. They are also unique, in that every song, though maintaining their quirky idiosychrasies, have a different feel to them. Some are drone like stories of dark, morbid places, and yet others resemble traditional jigs. They also incorporate a lot of harmonizing within their songs, although they do it with such subtlety one must really strain to pick it out at times.

So what does this mean?? Well that's up to you I suppose. I just wanted to reflect on what I hear when I listen to them. And I can't wait to see them again.

Music nerdery.....proceed with caution

2006-10-31T05:40:00.000-05:00

So it is like 5:30am on a tuesday, for some reason I woke up at 4:40 or so and cannot fall back to sleep. So I was like, well I can lay there and be useless, or I could use the time to do something creative. Cause well, these days blogging is about as creative as I get. It is sad, but until I have time to do some musical stuff, it will have to suffice.

So in the past week I have gone to two shows, and walked away from both fully content with things. Now as many of you know, there are few weeks that go by without me going to see somebody, so you would think this feeling would happen a lot, but it really doesn't. Do not think that I walk away from most shows un-happy, because that could not be farther from the truth. I am just saying some shows are more emotionally stimulating. Being blessed/cursed with an analytical brain, I am well aware that there is no good way to compare bands...because there is no way to differentiate, especially across genres, but after a lot of musical exposure, people form musical schemas for quick comparison.

I've been around music all my life, and I am grateful for this every day. There was always music around when I was growing up. And looking back, I was doomed to be a music snob. My mom played clarinet, grandpa: bari-sax, drums, alto sax, great grandma: concert violinist, uncles:banjo/guitar, grandpa: fiddle, sisters:clarinet, bassoon. And I'm sure there are some more I don't even know about. This combined with countless hours of intensive classical/jazz training...well I was doomed. So why is any of this even relevant??? Well, I can't really answer on how relevant is to anyone but myself, so I will do that. I think those who choose to study music, can find a much deeper level of understanding, on a cognitive and emotional level. For example, most often I can pick out time signatures, suspensions, rhythm's, etc, which I really find enjoyable. But at other times, there is no need to overanalyze bands for any of that stuff, and there is a natural emotional reaction. In my opinion, when these cognitive and emotional; elements combine, very few things can be as fulfilling.

The National played at the Blackcat last thursday night, which proved to be the first of two really spectacular shows. These four guys are the text book definition of heartfelt and true. For example, they tour together in a Subaru Forrester, and pretty much play out of what I call professional warm-up amps. I mean what screams grassroots like touring is a sports-wagon! So the music. The lead singer has a deceptively impressive voice for his tall, lanky frame. What I found impressive was how heartfelt his vocals were. Toss the lyrics out the window, for now. The vocals were never rushed or forced, and if anything was pushing on falling behind the beat. Everything he did was deliberate, and for a lack of words, soulful. The lyrics, powerful on their own, were that much better because of his style of singing. I would refer to the remaining members of the band as the leads singers back-up band. I am not saying that they are not important, there just wouldn't be a band without the singer. The arrangements by the musicians however, matched what they were trying to achieve seamlessly. There was ultra sweet chord picking when needed, but the band could crescendo to what I at the time referred to as "Mogwai Jr" like swells when called for. I was especially impressed with the drummer, who obviously went to great lengths to work with some complex rudiments to keep the rhythm's interesting. He was also impressive in that he knew what his role was, and never over-stepped any boundaries. In fact I was impressed by the bands un-selfishness as a whole. There were few instances where the members were not switching instruments, taking their turn playing either the guitar or bass. And though one was captured by the singers presence and emotions, he never came off as the "leader". Their lyrics are best qualified as emotional first person, assumed auto-biographies. This in part, is why I think they can so effectively play such an emotion invoking show, they lived it, they've dealt with it, and maybe they are still dealing with it. The songs are comprised of heartbreak, regret, and hopes of better times ahead. They do not so much tell the story, as they describe the emotions past through present. By doing this the audience is left with questions, as to what happened for such lyrics to result. And the wording of the lyrics is impressive as well, one must really decipher what the singer is trying to convey, so often lyrics are written for the lazy, spoon-feeding concepts and opinions. This band gives you the middle and end of the emotional story, and makes you create your own beginnings. All of this culminated in me being able to apply my own beginnings for the songs, and in most cases the middle and ends effectively followed similar paths that I have led. Is this why I enjoyed their show so much?? I think its part of it, but as I was told by a wise professor, "Life is multi-dimensional and complex". I do know that it was that much better, being their with someone that I loved. And had to fight off strong urges to not sneak away to a corner and have an impromptu make-out session. Unfortunately, I behaved myself, and was only disappointed by how fast the show went by.

I guess that concludes part one. On tap: The Decemberists at the 9:30 Club.

Goddamn Russians

2006-10-02T09:52:00.000-04:00

I give myself 1 year to work back up to this..... bahhh I miss music.

A reach around would have been nice....some people

2006-09-27T09:09:00.000-04:00

I am putting off work again...this time it is a paper about implementation of policy and how it relates to strip mining off-site accidents. Hey, I think it is interesting stuff. This is due next saturday, so I really need to get to work on this bitch.

Other news, Sarah is back in the states after a year in Iraq, and will be driving up next weekend to visit the VA. I'm pretty stoked, I have not seen her since my cross country road trip in errr May of 2005, and I only saw her for 2 days then. I may have to take some personal days off of work...who knows.

Burmese food is pretty fucking good, and spicy as balls. I got my tomato curry tofu goodness extra spicy, and it was delicious.

Nothing really big planned in the near future I suppose....some good shows coming up ie. cursive, dragonforce, the decemberists etc.. so that will be good times.

So to the meat of things, I had a physical on monday. I have not had a physical in some years, either because i was lazy or I did not have health insurance. So I went in to get my shit checked out. After reading an article about Nike cleaning up their production to be more eco-friendly, I was called back. The MA took all my vitals and stuff and through me the dreaded gown. And seriously, the gown is pretty ridiculous, its all weirdly proportioned and even if you use it as directed, your ass still hangs out in the cold. So here I am wrapped up in this transparent half sheet, and the doc rolls in. He definitely had his bedside manner down, all joking with me and stuff, then the exam started. The doc must have been practicing his routine like a professional stand-up comedian or some shit. He was all like "so what do you do"...and a finger went in the butt....and "so you are a native" and my balls got felt up. This man was good, because it was all over before I knew it....but i knew the worst always comes a bit later. Mainly the pipe cleaner in a small hole test. I mean really, you would think that as far as science has come, a better way would have been developed to take a sample. It is probably some "Christian Right" or reich... plot to scare people from having sex, ok, that may be a bit extreme...but they have been known to be involved in some fucked up plots..bitches. So after some bloodwork to test the cholesterol I was all done. The overall diagnosis was "you are healthy", so I have about 365 days until the poking and prodding happens again.

I guess that is all for now...back to reading.

Like Against me says...I'm never going home.......

2006-09-21T16:05:00.000-04:00

So I found a pic of this guy on MySpace today, no offense to the guy, BUT I have never seen a picture that so parsimoniously sums up Woodbridge. Fuck that place.

I mean come on now...

2006-09-21T09:52:00.000-04:00

So I am going through my morning routine, which basically consists of scouring the internet for interesting news, so I can be an informed news consumer. There has been this word floating around recently "mancation" so I opened up an article about it. To my absolute disgust, the media has once again ruined a perfectly good concept. Not be be like some grandpa who talks about walking through 5.2 miles of hot lava uphill while fighting off a case of inflamed herpes to get to school, but isn't mancation some fancy name for a roadtrip? I'm reading this article and I'm like "yeah...yeah...yeah, I've done that shit...I've done that too, but I've never called it a fucking mancation!" The media is always doing shit like this, and is not unlike the current administration and their color coded warning system. Always changing shit to gain peoples attention. Remember when guys who where cultured and dressed nice were called...ya know something like attractive, or stylish. But that wasn't good enough for the media, they had to do their part and invent the term "metrosexual" to sell some stories. I dunno what is going on anymore. I've taken my fair share of roadtrips, and done some questionable things (ex. waterslides) where only guys were present...it's called a roadtrip! Maybe I am getting grumpy in my old age or something, and maybe I'm overreacting, but this media twisting has to stop. I mean what is next. And the worst part, is because of this places ae catering this "mancation" nonsense. Hotels are setting up machismo rooms as we speak. I mean can you even imagine, a stable of strippers available with a push of a button, side by side booths for masterbating to porn...though set up so there is no peeking, wet taps of alcohol, murphy style poker tables that fall from the walls, big screen tv's with nothing but bass fishing and tractor pulls....the potential is endless!!! I mean that stuff happens on roadtrips...but at least it comes about naturally, there is no one waiting your destination "showing" you how to be a man. Weak sauce people, weak sauce indeed. So from this day forward, let it be known that Sam is not in favor of the
mancation!

I BLAME YOU HBO!!!!!!

I'm sorry I am such a slack-ass.......

2006-09-19T09:05:00.000-04:00

So I know I have made hollow promises to work on this bitch more often, but this time I have legitimate reasons, mainly being too fucking busy with school, and trying to maintain a social life. In fact the only reason I am writing this, is because it is giving me a second to breathe before tackling some more school work. So I will fill in, for those who are concerned as to what I've been up to.

This month has been hectic, and full of realizations. For instance, last week I realized that it had been about a year since I was dumped. And like Anka and I discussed Sunday, having the "anniversary" go by without even noticing pretty much sums up where I am right now. Now I only have a bit of buisness to settle with all of that, and it will be done and done. I'm not one to believe in fate and all that nonsense, but the things that have happened in th elast year sure have worked out for the better. I mean even my fuck-ups, as shitty as they were, have lead to a stronger relationship. It has taken a lot of patience, on both our parts, but that has been a small price for what I have now. I can honestly say that I am happier now, than I have been in years. I also think there is a shit ton of un-tapped potential in the future for Anka and I, I'm talking Voltron and shit! And I mean really, I knew she was special when one day we'd be going to see Arsis, and then have a lazy sunday with AU Bluegrass.... And, in a recent Sam discovery, being able to talk to someone is pretty fucking amazing....that just in.

I have also found myself back in the school grind, with both feet running. The only open public admin class was an 8 week accelerated class, so I got in. To sum it up...Class fri 6-9, sat 9-4, 14 chapters of reading between classes, then add in 3 papers. In 8 WEEKS! Balls I say, but I like it. The stuff we are talking about is all novel to me, so it's uber interesting. My job ended up picking up the tab for this degree so that is pretty sweet. Once mid October comes, I'm gonna be a happy Sam I know that. I am also taking BIO 607, which is a grad level ecology course, which is also super interesting. But that spans the whole semester, so it is a bit more laid back. So between work and school, I've been holed up in my bedroom most of the time. Ehh school..so much fun, yet so much work.

Work has been going pretty well. The amount of responsibility and the amount of power my opinions make, have been the biggest surprise thus far. It is all too hard to explain what I do, but at the end of the day my opinion will determine whether my company uses or looses the current database, and finds a better replacement. So its multidimensional and complex..as tennenbaum would say.

Let's see, so Cookie is doing well. My lovely parents have graced her with a new crate which is twice as big as the one I bought her. It's my first child, mistakes are bound to happen right. And I mean, she's a big girl. She is however adorable. I think Spike and her may have seperation issues when I can take her full time, gonna be sad. Will have to make sure there are plenty of friendly visits. It is sad that she is such a bitch, forces her to be a bit of a loner....takes after her daddy I guess. Cookie and her soccer ball=happiness.

Beyond that things are about the same. Going to shows, riding my bike when I have the time. Steffy and Mike are coming in Nov, Anka and I are meeting them in Mo'town for the USF game...should be good times. Sarah, just got back from Iraq, I guess she has a bunch of schoolin' to do before she can get up to these parts, but October I believe she will be up to visit. So for now I am focusing on this school thing, full force. Found a youth bike shop in DC I am gonna look into volunteering at, once I find the time. They teach kids how to fix bikes, and also sell recycled bikes for cheap, to provide pollution free transportation. So thats something on the backburner. Also, a trip to Tallahassee is in order I believe..def not till this 8 week course is over....but soon after.

Ok, enough wasting time I suppose, I need to get on a journal review of Shore Crab moulting, and its affect of reproductive success. ;)

Tata for now

When it rains it pours.....

2006-07-25T15:51:00.000-04:00

Before the work day closes, I thought I would chime in and give a quick update of stuff that has been going on as of late.

First off, I have been offered and have accepted a position at Baker engineering. My new title will be "Analyst II". I'll be working on the FEMA contract our company has. It seems that my months..well a few days shy of a year...of patience has paid off. I will be getting a substantial raise, benefits, and school paid for. So now I can officially say that I am in the workforce. My official start date is July 31st...wish me luck.

Second, Anka and I have adopted a puppy. Well more like a 2 year old ball of boxer energy. Her name is cookie, not our choice, she came with it, but we figure we'd keep as to not confuse her. She is still getting to know Hazel and Piper, but we hope they can all be friends. But Cookie is definitely a dominant female. So we expect good things. And if things do not work out with Piper and Hazel, Cookie has an offer from my parents to live with them until I move into a dog friendly house. Which I'm working on as well.

Third, The vegetarian thing has been in effect for well over 3 month now. Awhile back Greg said that 3 months is the hump. He said that if you can make it 3 month without cheating, it is all downhill from there. Well I can say that I have sucessfully passed the hump, and have not cheated, and only get the meat cravings every now and again. However..with todays vast array of meat substitutes, I do ok for myself.

Fourthly, School starts in a little over 1 month, I am currently enrolled in 2 classes, which will be plenty for me with the whole working full time deal. The program is 36 credits...ao I expect it to take 2 years to finish. Classes look interesting, so hopefully it will be good times. If Baker picks up the tab, I owe them my ass for one year after I graduate...although i can re-locate. Philly...San Diego...Denver...Chicago...who knows where I'll end up.

So I guess that is all for now, if you need me I will either be spending time with my 2 favorite girls.. or at a show. Go figure.

Random fact: Cashews do not come in shells, because the outer coating is extremely caustic!!

Random Thought: I wish I had Nelson Mandelas' style, that man is always rocking the awesome attire.

How Cute is She!!

2006-07-23T23:45:00.000-04:00

Anka and I get to bring her home tommorrow (7/24/06)

Why would I be offended??

2006-07-18T08:35:00.000-04:00

Thanks for all the advice, both from those who posted here, and those who wrote via e-mail. I'll post the comment here permanently, and remove the original letter.

Cheers

Sammy
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So, this is Courtney, and I may be biased, but she DID say that wrote a long meaningful letter that got erased. And she DOES have a point. You want the affection of being Dad, then you need to take part in all the responsibilities. And even the ring thing, she's right there too, though yes, she SHOULD give it back, she doesn't HAVE to because it was a gift. So her points were good, but the tone of it was off. It wasn't very nice sounding, but then I don't know the whole of what went on between you two, and it could be she is still harboring anger, as I'm sure you are too.
And it sounds like she stressed about things like finances and really, we don't pay our soldiers shit so that's understandable too. I would simply take into account the points she is bringing up and if you want to address the tone of the email, let her know you thought about what she said, but that you would have appreciated it in a nicer manner which of course will piss her off and she'll say that she told you she wrote a meaningful one and it got erased and she already apologized in prelude to the abrupt / rude sounding letter.

And keep in mind. There are probably things beneath the surface that you don't know about. I was a HUGE bitch to everyone I knew for a long time, but what they DIDN"T know was that I was having panic attacks whenever I left the house and was trying to control them. It's an example. Always try to act with compassion even when people don't seem to deserve it.

And how bout that beer?; 10:50 AM
Anonymous said...: I think she is the dishonorable one, therefore, she has no right to talk about honor. She made a promise and broke it off.....therefore, no deal, you should get the ring back. I don't even know why she would want it or think she has the right to keep a ring that symbolized feelings that are OVER. She obviously is not the same girl you thought you loved and wanted to marry, bc that girl would not have called it off.

Bottom line is that you have been helping her out with the cat and furniture because at the time you agreed to, you still cared greatly for her. Well, I'm guessing you've moved on, so the bitch should cut her losses, give back the ring, pay you for the cat bills, and pick up her damn furniture (that if she doesnt pay you, you should pawn.. haha).

I'm sick of girls that break guy's hearts and then expect compensation for the relationship, like the guy owes them something. Why isn't the price of a broken heart satisfactory?; 10:54 AM
Anonymous said...: hey babe,

sorry your life has been going like that - i hope you are doing ok!

i don't really think the argument is any of my business, but due to my brief stint in law school, here's the deal on the ring:

an engagement ring is a contract, NOT A GIFT, fulfilled only by marriage (to the person from whom the ring was received). It must be given back, no matter who is at fault (this includes stabbing), whenever the engagement is broken. If however, the marriage takes place, the ring becomes the property of the wearer (usually the wife).

so do NOT let her bully you - i don't know who's at fault or what went on, but the ring, unfortunately for her, must LEGALLY be returned to you.; 1:36 PM
Anonymous said...: In the words of John Pinnette, Nay Nay.

You're a nice guy, Sam, and you did a series of favors for this girl, who really didn't do much for you except bail out the second things got difficult. It seems like things are tough for her now, due SOLELY to her actions and choices. Not your problem, you're taking care of what you need to and her business as well.

The ring should have long since been back. Moments after somebody backs out of an engagement, the ring is returned.

The cat was her responsibility, which she neglected. You did a nice thing taking care of it, but it's not your problem that she makes commitments and then doesn't live up to them.

Also, she's not a very nice person in general. Anka's a better woman, from what I know.

Don't Let The Bastards Grind You Down,
Anonymous.; 4:51 PM
Anonymous said...: hey bud.

i'm not one to sugar coat or beat around the bush, so here goes...

fuck her.

you got enough friends.

like your lawyer friend said... the ring is yours.

the cat was hers... aside from her and her inability to live her life
efficiently (ie. pay her fucking bills) the cat is registered in her name
and she has responsibilty for it's actions/debts... you said you were the
'dad' because she was too much of a slack ass piece of shit to take care of
what she signed on for years ago... the cat is her responsibility that she
PUSHED onto you. Tough shit for her that it died while she was fuckin' some
other dude...(sorry about that... but you're past that... right?)

You have the law on your side... you've moved on so don't worry about her
fuckin' feelings.

There is a fine line between what is right and what you want... fortunately
for you, this time they happen to be on the same side.

aight.

love ya bud.

lookin forward to the beach.

hope all works out for ya'.
Casby: 7:14 AM
Anonymous said...: Objectively speaking, it seems like the bride-to-have-been is simply bitter about her current position in life and isn't taking responsibility for her actions (or lack thereof). In psychology we call this Projection, in which case this girl's irritation with herself is being put upon Sam. I would expect maybe something like a couple weeks as a reasonable amount of time in which to give a wedding ring back to someone whom the recipient rejected, but six months is ludicrous. She makes the decision to break it off, and keeps Sam waiting all that time? For shame.

Blackass was in Sam's custody for over a year, he talked about the cat often, and he was definitely upset by his euthanizing, yet he's accused of not taking responsibility? How can one care for a cat that long, spend over $700 in medical bills up front, and yet not be taking responsibility? As far as any rational person is concerned, thats ownership. If anything, she should be thanking Sam profusely for doing something she obviously couldn't.

In regard to the ambiguously missing "long and meaningful letter" that got "erased", that is irrelevant and you should learn to save. (Ctrl+S shortcut key, its wicked easy) Not to mention, I don't know of a single email program that doesn't save a sent copy...

Lastly, stop blaming other people for your problems, especially after you ditch them. Lots of people go through hard times at this age (Sam still doesn't have benefits), especially with money, yet none of that gives one the right to delay matters of this importance. The ring, the cat and your belongings should have been dealt with long ago if its giving you such a hard time. Get your act together.; 10:28 AM
Anonymous said...: You know, I really hope all of you feel ashamed of yourself. You don't know her side of the story, and you don't her. You don't know what sacrifices SHE has made, and what bullshit SHE has put up with. I love you too Sam, I do, but you shouldn't put up with this shit. Maybe your friends are trying to make you feel better, but fuck a bunch of pussies who post anonymous comments dissing a girl that they don't know because she had the courage to break off something that would have made you both unhappy in the long run.
I love you both.
I really really do.
I hope you both heal, and I can only imagine how difficult this is for you to deal with, but I am appalled by some of these comments, and I hope you are too.
In the interest of not remaining anonymous, this is Courtney.

The most evil thing....IN THE WORLD

2006-06-08T19:07:00.000-04:00

Today I am here to write about the single most evil, manipulative, conniving, blue-ball causing thing on the face of the earth. People will argue that there are more evil things...I have no doubt of this. But, in my world there is one thing and one thing alone that is truly EVIL....what is this horrid thing you ask? I am speaking of none other than fucking Websense!

For those of you who are lucky enough to never come in contact with websense, I will take this time to fill you in on what it is and how it works. Websense(shiver) is this evil program that corporations use to block their workers from seeing vital information via the internet. I know all of us have experience some kind of filter at one point or another, but Websense is a whole different kind of beast. This fucker reads your mind!!! I swear that it does. I cannot actually prove this, because that would require time travel, and no one has perfected that one yet. But, you have to believe me, this program knows what I'm thinking. I will be like, "I'd really like to look the lyrics of this song up". BAM....Access denied, category entertainment is not permitted. What the fuck! How do they expect me to stay sane when I cannot look at anything related to music. And that is only the beginning....sports BLOCKED! Humor BLOCKED! Entertainment BLOCKED! adult themes BLOCKED! pro choice BLOCKED!

I do not know this for a fact, but it is my opinion this company is run by very bitter people, who feed on pain and misery. I can only picture some barren 25 story crooked ass building in some dreary east block town where websense is based. The workers sit in dimly lit cubicles, and resemble little ogres or hunchbacked trolls. They sit for 24 a day, never sleeping, surfing the internet and updating blocked sites/categories in real time. And there is one employee for every user of websense, and he was put on this earth to make your work day miserable. I wish i could meet my ogre/troll "mirror" and give him a thumbs down with a headshake.

So now that my bitching is over, I will give some facts as to why besides causing me great grief and sadness, Websense makes NO-SENSE! The fact is, I find what I'm looking for....eventually. Most would give up, but come on I'm sam, and I can outsmart some fucking hunchbacked trolls! However, it is time consuming. I figure that if the company would let me see the pages i wanted immediately, I could get what I wanted and be done with it. This is not the case. Currently it takes me several minutes...hours sometimes to figure ways to bypass the system and get what I want. So you see, i actually spend more time away from my work, trying to outfool the websense. And if I am doing it, you know everyone else is. I can't be the only one who looks for loopholes.

On a plus side, with my surely average IQ, I have figured a way to beat the system. I will not go into detail, in case the websense is currently reading my thoughts, but I have done it. So there is hope for all who have been restricted by the evil! Something needs to be done about this atrocity, maybe this blog will start the revolution!

Little Over A Month Down

2006-06-05T22:47:00.000-04:00

So as you all know from a prior post, I have adopted the vegetarian lifestyle. It has been a bit over 1 month, well actually almost a month and a half...and I am here to discuss how it has gone. For anyone who is curious, I have not cheated yet. I was afraid that it would be a weaning process, taking away things as I went. But it seems that I have more self-control than I thought. Those around me have commented on my "hit the ground running" technique, and seem pretty impressed. In all honesty though, it has not been too too hard. I miss the shit out of meat though!!! But, gotta stick by moral decisions right??? So now I'll cover the things that I have learned in the past 6 weeks.

- I thought that I had bad gas awhile back.....nu uhhh it was nothing compared to whats going on with my ass these days. I cannot even begin to explain the gas build-up as of late. The strangest part is that the gas does not necessarily smell, it is just omnipresent.

- I thought being "regular " was just an expression. This too has been debunked as of late. I shit like an alarm clock these days. Not like a strike of 2 alarm clock, it is a lil less precise, but not really. Everyday between 2-4 I have to shit. These too are a lil different...they are a lot less forced.

- I realized how fucking hard to find meals in ordinary "chain" restaurants. And Irish places...ha forget it. Thank god for ethnic food!

- I realize that tofu may be the easiest food to cook, but teh hardest to cook well. My goal is to perfect the art of tofu cookage.

- I am realizing that many of the meat substitutes taste exactly like meat, and they fill the meat void that I have been having.

- I have taught/forced myself to eat vegetables that scared me in the past. Some are taking longer than others, but since they make up almost my entire diet...they are kinda important. I will conquer the tomato!! This is another goal!

Umm other than that, nothing else has really changed. Before I go I would like to thank Anka and Greg, they are my personal advisors when it comes to vegetarianism....they give me little bits of knowledge like fish bladder is used to refine some beers...guiness anyone? And that enzymes from sheep stomachs are a key ingredient in sour cream. So I guess that is all for now. Greg says the 3 month hump is the true decider....so I'll let you know how I'm doing in a month and a half.

Cheers

Field Trip Romances

2006-05-19T19:37:00.000-04:00

So Memorial Day is coming up, and now I'm old and shit, all it means is a day off of work. But, there was a younger more innocent time when this magical meant one thing...the opening of theme parks. I mean ok, to be technical, because I know my friends are sticklers for correct data, they are open on some weekends before Memorial Day, but M-Day is the Grand Opening. So yes, I was sitting around thinking about this and it brought back memories, not so much of Memorial Day itself, but more about field trips, band trips, and random trips with friends.

I think this is going to be one of those blogs that people will have no clue what I am trying to say via the title, but once you understand what I am trying to convey....a little light bulb will appear, and inspire a memory.

So yes, through school, mostly band, I have been on too many "field trips" to count. Some lasted for days, others were a out early, back in time to catch the bus home, but all were fun. In the earlier years the trips were a time to fuck around, depending on the awesomeness of your chaperone (sounds like a blog of its own). You would go somewhere fairly interesting, and pretty much run as wild as you could. And I mean these trips were great, but things changed quickly....I'm talking about the realization that girls were awesome.

I guess I will define Field Trip romance now, I will explain as best I can. So I want all of you to think back to a field trip that you had in school, think museums, band trips, overnighters etc..... We there? Ok, now think about how the typical field trip went. And I guess it differs greatly if you were single or in a relationship, so maybe i'll touch on that later. For now I'll assume you were all single for this blog. So you of course had your eye on someone, maybe other knew, maybe only you....but there was someone who had your eye. So you obviously, want to be around these people as much as you can while on a field trip. Now I dunno if there is some official rule about this...but I'd bet the majority of folks out there thought like this. So you make your move and attach yourself to whatever group this other person is in. Now, this would be hard in pre assigned groups...unless you were on the same bus, or there were communal times such as lunch/dinner. However..amusement parks......awesome!. So you hang around this person, often someone who you thought had no idea who you were, but for some strange reason shows interest in you on these trips. Conversation, laughter, and flirting all occurs, and you have a surreal great time................Flash forward to the bus ride....you often sitting with these people on the ride home, you talk some goof off etc...and on some special occasions you get into that weird bus resting on each other thing going on. The trip is over..............

When you get home, you are super stoked about the events of the trip, and can hardly sleep. Then you wake up, and have the weekend to think about what happened and want nothing more than to get back to school and see the guy/girl of your field trip romance. Then the day comes, you are super nervous, have the butterflies, and can't stop smiling. Then it happens. You make an attempt to talk to said person, and the reaction is as if the trip had never occured. And it is the worst kind of kick in the balls. Reasons for this phenomenon?? I have no idea why this happens. And I mean on some occasions, the other person still will communicate with you, but you realize quickly that it was in fact just a field trip romance that will never amount to anything more.

So now I ask if anyone has been here before? I know I have, on several occasions and like I said Memorial day just kind of re-sparks these experiences. Luckily this year on Memorial Day I'll spend my time with someone that I love, and hopefully will want to talk to me the day after.

The moral of this blog? Well, I dunno if it has one....however, if you are ever in a situation where you are a chaperone...please practice awesomeness. That is all.

Golf is so fucking hard........

2006-05-17T15:32:00.000-04:00

So this past monday, Baker had its annual golf scramble "icebreaker" at the Shenandoah Country Club in Front Royal, VA. Our department fielded two teams, one being what could be considered the "A" team....and then there was my squad. The squad consisted of Lindsey, Daniel, John, and I......with a combined 18 hole record of well, none of us had ever played a whole 18 holes of golf. Even better, Daniel had never golfed before. I think you guys have an idea of where this is headed.........

So we'll start at the beginning...

Monday morning we all show up ass early to work, we figure we could get a few hours of work in before we take off...yeah, not much gets done..and John treats us all to his golfing attire, aka a pink polo, anne taylor striped pants, and a pink jacket that says "so magic" on the right chest.....refer to pictures. At around 10am we all get antsy and take the fuck off. After being on the road for a short while, we decide to take a detour to the giant. So here we are, in our golfing outfits, buying beer and limes at 10:30 in the morning....as you could imagine, we recieved absolutely nooo strange looks. But fuck em, we needed beer. Next stop McDonalds... We walk into McDonalds and well we get the weird vibe. I have been to Front Royal Hundreds of times, being my grandparents lived there for probably 20 years of my life, but i forgot how un-diverse that place was. We walked in and it looked like a biker bar munchin down on big macs, and then i looked over to John and was like "Oh Dear God". Thankfully, no one said anything and we got out alive.

We arrive at the club, and meet up with our co-workers. A man comes around and takes lindsey and my clubs off to I dunno where, he claimed they would be waiting for us or some shit, and they magically were. However, they seemed to intentionally avoid john and daniel...I think Johns pinkness scared these poor men away. We make our way over to the driving range and warm-up a bit. I hit maybe 5 of my 20 balls, so I had an idea of where I'd be this day. So I'm done warming up...and then something special happens...Lindsey and I run into Ted and he points us to the two free kegs that were just tapped. Free beer...shit you know we were on it. So we have a few, and then we are off.

I will let the pictures tell the tale.... but it was a great day. And oh yes..we shot a 120. From the reaction I got from Joey.....I take it that is not a great number. The winning team shot a 64 i think...but did they chase cows, and discuss crevice fucking??? I believe not! Cheers, and can't wait till next year.

"Someone should check his temperature"...........

2006-05-16T19:45:00.000-04:00

So I'm back to the blogging, todays installment will be about a recent life change and an explanation as to why it came about. Now this next statement will most likely shock you, if you know me. I mean, for those who know me well...it may do more than shock. So be warned, and stop reading if you have a heart condition etc.... I have decided to persue the vegetarian lifestyle. I have in fact been meat free for over two weeks and counting. Now to get some obvious questions out of the way. Yes, Anka is a vegetarian. Would I be a vegetarian right now if I had never met her, possibly but most likely not. Was I given an ultimatum by her...not once. I have never been in a situation where she said "meat or me" or anything like that. So hopefully that clears that up. I know some will forever think that I did it because of her, and well I guess that is half true and half false.

So why am I doing it???

I have always had an interest in nature and the environment, there was even an occasion when I wanted to go to school for geology or something in that line of study. Psychology, however won out. BUT, this August I am starting an MPA program in Environmental Science and Public Policy. And I mean really, how can you call yourself an environmentalist and eat meat. If you do not understand what I mean, think about it. Think of how many resources are both used and wasted on farming livestock. Everyone complains about dirty rivers, and global warming, but they do not consider the fact that livestock run-off is polluting rivers, and methane from cattle is adding to the pollutants in the air. So this is why it is hypocritical to say you are an environmentalist and continue to put money into a harmful industry you are trying to clean up.

Second reason, the humane treatment of farm animals. Now this is just fucked up. If you want to see how your meat lives before making it to your plate, take a 12 minute lesson from Alec Baldwin in "meet your meat". I have nothing against eating meat, I should say that I have no problem with eating meat that comes from humane farms. I know it is a bit of an oxymoron, but they do exist. These farms allow animals to free roam, do not incorporate growth hormones, and make slaughter as painless as possible. In case you were wondering, electrocution is the preferred humane way of slaughter. If done right with a high enough voltage, the animals die immediately and are thought to feel no pain. I do however have problems with the more common treatment of farm animals in this country. Refer to the video. I warn ahead of time the video is a bit graphic...but it is real.

Third reason, when confronted with the question of why I eat meat, the best answer I could come up with was "it tastes good". Seriously, think about it. It is entirely possible to survive sans meat. And meat tastes good??? Made me come off as quite selfish and unconcerned.

So there you have it. But to all that read this...do not worry I am still the foul mouthed, sarcastic, ass-hole you have all grown to love/like/hate. And I promise to not be super preachy and push my beliefs on everyone I see....i mean shit that would be like that silly religion stuff that people talk about so much. ;)

Soon to come will be a blog describing my bowel movements/gas patterns since switching over...... Let me tell you now...it is ridiculous.

P.S. Stef and Mike are in Seattle...they have an apartment...she has a job....and is probably still a wino...refer to upper pic ;)

The Rising Sock-Line.....An observation

2006-05-01T16:35:00.000-04:00

So I live in Arlington now, famous for uhhh the Arlington National Cemetery...and well that is about it. I do not mind the area, please do not get that idea by reading this. My house is a few minutes from the city, and pretty much close to all kinds of shit to do. My problem stems from the realization, that I am fighting a day to day to avoid getting pulled into the yuppie, Twenty-Something debacle that is the defining culture in Arlington. It is really hard for me to describe what I see on a daily basis, but because I am Sam, I will do my best. I will use the grocery store for this anecdote. Around my house I have the ghetto Giant, now it is not Richmond Community Pride ghetto, but it is lacking in anything that is worth buying. Due to this, I am forced into the Ballston/Clarendon area to do my grocery shopping at either the Harris Teeter or Whole Foods. These places scare me mainly due to the fact they are lacking any sort of diversity, in all honesty the most diverse people I see on one of these trips are the minority workers in the parking lot directing traffic..yes you read that correctly, Whole Foods has people there to direct you to parking spaces....I'd like to see that at Publix or Albertsons! Ok so anyways back to the shopping experience. In all honesty I can relate my grocery shopping experiences to going "clubbing" at a shitty college club. Everywhere you look while shopping in these establishments there are people super dressed up like they should be at a club, then there are the Frumps (an entire blog entry in itself), then there are the just out of work kids who look like they just came from a fraternity formal or some shit. It gives me the goosebumps I swear. To a "normal" person, these yuppie shoppers would be frightening, and would most likely raise eyebrows...however, the thing that astonishes me the most is that everyone at these stores act as if there is nothing out of the ordinary. So needless to say, when it is grocery time for Sam, it is done quickly....with as little eye contact as possible. Any direct eye contact, or stimulus input via my eyes almost always causes dysthymia... Ok so now I'll tie in the title with my present situation.
As part of this yuppie amalgam knows as Claraballington, I find myself in the Epicenter of all that is evil at least a few times a week....otherwise known as Gold's Gym. Now I have nothing against the gym, in fact I enjoy working out and going. However, gym traditionally breed oversized douchebags, and the one in ballston is no different. Now historically there have been different ways to show off ones monetary success or a persons place in society. I mean there were purple robes, being purple dyes could only be afforded by the upper class, there were slaves and land, today it is often measured in gas guzzling SUV's and the darkness of your tan. I however propose a new method of picking out social classes, this being the sock line. One day I was minding my own business, and noticed something. Everyone at the gym had permanent sock lines. All the guys were in shorts and tee's, but above their sport socks was a line about 6-8 inches higher where their dress elastic socks had cut into their circulation for the previous 8 hour work day. So then I applied my theory to the females around the gym, and the same thing applied. Actually with them it was kinda hot because they had knee-high markings. This blew my mind completely, and made me stop to think where I was. Shortly after this, I was also amazed at a trip to the store with my pops. We were looking for "work" socks...this is what I described to him as needing...we both convened and in his hands were a pack of work boot socks...in mine were a set of "dress" socks.....it was a little weird I guess.
The saddest part about all of this is, I too am forming the permanent high sock-line, due to my present employment scenario. Right now I do not know how I feel about this, I do know it is not going to go away as long as I am working here, and will follow me to many a workplace environments....but do I really want that? As a side, it has been awhile since I have updated this bastard...so for those concerned I did get into the MPA program at Mason.....so who knows maybe boots and short socks will be called for once I finish that program.....

Random Fact: according to Joey...Chipotle burritos are stuffed with fetus'. Maybe it is not a fact, but that shit is pretty random.

So I'm a Fuckin' Liar...get over it

2006-01-22T23:46:00.000-05:00

Ok ok , so I know that I said I would write in this blog more often...and well I have not really been doing it. But in my defense, between work and the ever blooming social life, it is hard to find time to sit down and write. Ok so the blooming social life is a bit of stretch, but work does put me into tired mode when I get home, and well after 8 hours at a computer....I don't really feel like looking at one when I get home. So I hope everyone out there that actually takes the time to read this is well and all that good gooshy stuff. I guess I'll go over some of the stuff that I have been up to these days................

Um on the work front, still at the same job, and it is going well. They have still not exactly hired me as of yet....but they are actually in the process of doing that as we speak. All of the temps (3 of us) have been working with the assurance that we would be hired once this big contract went through....so all of our applications are in processing right now....so cross your fingers that any day now I will have some benefits, and I can finally get my ears looked at! Fuckin' ear infections dude! Um so yeah, as I've been here a few months, more responsibility has been put on me, and now I am pretty much doing my job on my own. Still working with the DC Water Authority and their lead replacement program. Kinda hard to explain what I do..but its not bad. I'm learning a lot about Access...and working with the EPA to develop reports. And the most important part is that my job is actually helping people. As a side note, as soon as my recommendation letters get here, I will be ready to send off my MPA application to GMU.....kinda nervous about this one, since my science background is more human than anything else. But ya know..like gretzsky says ya miss 100% of the shots you never take. So I guess we will see. So yeah, there are def some weird people in my office, and I will write a whole blog about them sometime soon............Ok so as an update...no hiring as of yet, however a raise is in the works, so that should work out for the time being. Everything necessary for the GMU application has arrived, and will be mailed out sealed with a kiss ASAP.

Things at the house are pretty awesome, everyone has settled in since the last time I updated this bitch. When Brozy and the Wop moved in, the shear amount of moving boxes frightened us all, but as they were un-packed/organized, and put away...everything fell into place, and the place looks pretty nice. We have hosted multiple gatherings, and have at least one more in the works in the near future. AKA Mikes return from the Desert.

Yeah, so I've been writting this same entry in parts for over a month now..so i'm gonna bullet what I've been doing so i can post this shit and move on. In no particular time-line order.

- shit load of concerts
- riding my bike around DC at two in the morning
- snowball fight on 14th street at 3am
- a plethora of crossword puzzles
- a massive influx of dvd burning
- helping to win at trivia
- karaoke
- lounging at the Diner for hours
- movie watching
...................................................I guess that is just a short intro to what has been happening these days....but i swear right now, that I will keep this fucker more up to date.

The rumor of my demise has been greatly exaggerated

2005-12-07T22:14:00.000-05:00

Yeah yeah yeah, I know I have not written on this bitch in like two months or so, so I apologize to anyone who actually reads this giberish. Things have just been a tad crazy lately. I have tried starting a new blog on several occasions but ended up scraping all of those attempts. So I guess I will fill you in on whats been happening these days.

I suppose the biggest news is that I have moved to a nice little house in Arlington. For those who want to send me shit, the address is 208 S courthouse Rd Arlington, VA 22204. It is a nice little place, at the moment it is just Zach and I living here, but on January 20th we will be gaining the company of Brozy and that crazy woptasticon Joey. When the quadfecta is complete...well there is no telling what is going to happen! Ok so the place is nice, little backyard and such, decent room, but location is key. I live right off 395, INSIDE the beltway, and I can get across the 14th street bridge in like 6 or so minutes. Ricockulous, is all I've gotta say. So this can only mean one thing...you fuckers need to come visit.

Lets see, since I've posted last I have made a return to Tally, which felt a bit odd, but was definitely fun. I think it was odd because, it became aparent to me that I was done with Tallahassee, and had no desire to live there anymore. Now that is not saying that I do not miss the people, in fact I consider a handful of folks down there to be some of my closest friends. That out of the way, I had a blast hanging out with all the old school kids...the BW3 conversation was classic..i mean come on it was the original incoming class, minus Dom and the blacksheep....you guys know who I am talking about...if not, think carbomb night. Sorry Joey. But yeah, I am glad I made the mecca, and plan to make it a yearly or bi-annual sorta thing. Only shitty part was it was way to fucking short.

On the personal homefront, I have been keeping things pretty low-key I suppose. The Blackass and I are still adjusting to the new place, and are starting to get settled. The adbuster flag is up in my room, so its starting to feel like a real room ;) But yeah, I like this place, and I think it will be a good thing in the long run. Hmm so yeah, for those who have not talked to me in awhile, I have been seeing someone for a couple few weeks. Her name is Anka, and hopefully she does not get pissed that I'm writing about her ;) But I doubt she would. I won't get crazy with details, unless you talk with me in person, but let it be said that she is an awesome girl. And most importantly I am learning a lot from her. So we've been hanging out a lot, and she has been acting as my personal tour guide of DC, which has worked out well if I may so myself. And the concerts...don't even get me started on some of the sick bands I've seen lately thanks to her. But like I said if you want to know more hit me up, and I'll talk your ear off about everything.

Family news! My mom is still crazy, and my dad is still the greatest guy on earth. Sarah is in tagrit(sp) Iraq right now, working in a clinic. She writes when she can, but since they do not have ER or operating facilities she does not see a lot of nasty stuff, thank goodness, for this is what I was most afraid of. PTSD and shit, is nothing to be fucked with! As for my beautiful little sister Stef...two big events! She is happily engaged to Mike, we all saw it coming for sometime, and I am truely happy for her. No wedding date is set yet, probably gonna be in a year or more, but I have no worries that it will fucking rock. Also in Steffy news, she is graduationg from the Powerhouse of the Big-East, WVU, this Sunday, Dec 11th! Ohh how she's grown up, super proud of the girl.

Work is work, I've got my routine down pretty much these days, and can actually do shit that people ask for without a million questions. I suppose that is a start. Now I'm getting some shit in order I'm trying to find some purposeful things to spend my free time doing. I am pretty sure Zach and I are going to start volunteering at Habitat for Humanity in DC in the near future, cause ya know I love to build shit, and I love Jimmy Carter.........I can't go fucking wrong!! Also as crazy as it sounds, I am applying to GMU in the fall, to an MPA program in Environmental Science and Public Policy....I'm hoping 1) I get accepted, and 2) my job will pay for it. But I guess I won't count my chickens before they are hatched, aye?

So yeah I guess that is a quick summary of whats ben going on. And now is the time of SPROCKETS where I talk of the future.
Tomm Dec 8th: Children of Bodom @ 9:30 club
Dec 8th-9th: Mia is in town, Fuckin Rock!
Dec 11th: Stefs Graduation
Dec 17th: First official 208 S Courthouse social gathering..aka throwdown
Dec 24th: likely getdown at Matt's
Dec 25th: The traditional Karaoke night at Rock It! grill in Old Town

I have no plans for New Years....so why doesn't someone make me an offer??? I am easily persuaded, and have been known to be fun on occasion ;)

Ok so I guess that is all for right now, yeah so I'll try to write in this piecee more often, I make no promises of course. I am sure I'll find some shit to bitch about soon enough. Like the douche bag with the corvette at Baja Fresh today...double parking in the compact car zone. I really wanted to piss on his door so it would freeze shut while he was eating his burrito.....but I just walked away, I'm getting soft I tell you! But yeah....i need to get to bed. I have a feeling tomm eve/night is gonna be a wild one ;) So I'm out for now.

Song o the day: Against Me! Scream Until You're Coughing Up Blood

Everything
You got to hold on to
Everything
You relied on to be there is completely fucked
There's a skeleton of loyalty hanging in the gallows of your heart
(no one wins this one)
And where are your friends?
Please help me through these years ahead.
Are we just drinking buddies
Playing with each other's deepest vulnerability?
That this is all we know?
So this is how it's gonna stay?
I think I
Would rather
Remember how it was and go our separate ways.
I don't feel anything
Unless we are living and dying for each other
Every second of our lives.

Everything
You thought that it would be,
Everything
You thought you were living for is completely fucked.
This is no place to be.
If we don't get out of here right now,
We're just gonna end up drunk, fucking,
and fighting and working machines.
If I have another cigarette,
If I drink another beer,
Sit quiet another time when I should've said
"Oh, this is too much.
There are things I never wanted to be."
This ship has sprung a leak
And I'll be damned if I'm going down with it.
Still breathing at any cost.

Brit Pop...house o fun...and ihop, another weekend gone

2005-10-09T22:06:00.000-04:00

So It is Sunday night, aka laundry day...so between loads I figured I'd post a bit on here about the weekend and such. But I'll get to that in a minute. If you scroll around the ol' blog, you will notice that I stripped it of uber depressing things...I actually started a new blog for me to post things of that nature. So if you are at all interested in ever reading that one, get in touch with me, it will be one of those by invite only kind of deals. Also, the ever eloquent Mr. Zach wrote some truth that I think everyone should read. Obviously you will not get all the references...but I would hope that you are lucky enough for it to apply you. The jaguar was the original "group blog" for us kids...lightyears before livejournal..and blogspot and all that. So yeah give it a read sometime...if you search hard enough you may even run across some old pictures of me.... www.jaguar7926.com

The weekend...

So the weekend was supposed to be spent down in richmond with the casby, but he had some serious family issues to deal with this weekend...and ended up coming up friday night. As always, it was a good night we just hung out killed some drinks, played really really shitty pool..man we were awful. He is more of a trooper than I, we ended up getting to mine right around 2...and he had to fly out of BWI at some ungodly early time. He does not know it yet, but I will be spending this upcoming weekend in Richmond...so if you read this casby..be warned.

Sat I worked a bit for pops, insulating some a/c shit....so they claim they have invented "itchless" insulation...now that shit itches less, but sure as shit is not itchless.... Did that for a few hours, came home and napped cause i was dead tired from being up all late on fri night. Kinda putted around all day, then recieved the call from Zach...it was Britpop night at the Blackcat aka "Mouse Trap". So about 9:30 ish i jet my way up to arlington to meet up with Zach, Brozy, and some girls Brozy knew. When i got there, the girls were lookin like they were ready to go....so I proceeded to pound a vodka and redbull..a good 3 or 4 shot mix....and we were out the door. Zach and I took a seperate taxi, as to not be crowded...and our taxi driver was fuckin nuts. At first he was all quiet, and we were like, cool man. Then we started chatting, and he ended up being crazy. Talking about "fucking racing other taxis" and honking at 1 car with no less than 15 taps on the horn...fuckin ridiculous. We eventually got to the Blackcat... in one piece, so the night had officially begun.

"Mouse Trap"

Now I was a virgin to said Mouse Trap, so I had no idea what to expect, but I was pleasantly surprised. Mouse trap could be the happiest place on earth, and it is found once a month at the Blackcat. It is hard to explain, but imagine 500 white indie kids, all smiles, fucking dancing their asses off for hours on end. I being the observer, witnessed said enjoyment. When we arrived, it was pretty empty, but both Brozy and Zach assured me it would fill up...and it did. But person after person came through the double doors leading to the "mouse trap" and in ever case the same shit happened. Let me explain the best I can.... so this girl came through the door, and she was in no way different from the other 500 kids who wentthrough the same door, but as she entered the room all in one connected motion...a huge smile came across her face.....her jacket was swung off in an almost rehearsed fashion, and she began dancing her way up to where the dance floor was.. And this happed the whole night. We started as wallflowers a bit..drinking and chatting things up..but we eventually made it to the floor.....and we danced...and danced...and had a fuckin blast. At least I had a blast, and I am hoping everyone involved did as well. It was just so goddamned happy in there, you bump someone they just smiled and danced away.....wild man wild. Brozy and the girls dipped a bit early...zach and I stayed till about 2 or so.....and there will be a return to this land of smiles in the month to come.... The above picture is Brozy getting supper jazzed about getting out to the dance floor...either that or he was looking to fight me...but there is no fighting at mousetrap!

The House.....

On the ride home, Zach gets a call from Megan....and our taxi ride home was diverted to Adriens house. Now by this point I am basically housed, so I have no resitance to any type of suggestion. So we roll in and I find a liquor buffet in the kitchen...god bless. An almost untouched bottle of captain morgan. I cannot remember much about the house party...i do remember megan and martha being there...I had not seen that girl in eons. But yeah not much happened there...zach shouted cambodian/chinese insults at a vietnese girl...I drank..and spilled a lot on my shoes...megan played too much flipcup....and two girls tried to pick zach and I up on the walk back to IHOP........Good times.

IHOP:

There is nothing better to finish off an alcohol bender than putting some oh so graesy ihop in the gullet, so that is exactly what we did. Brozy had the sense to not eat...and probably felt better than Zach and I did today. We sat at the IHOP for a good bit, just shooting the shit, and discussing the occurences of the night...the general consensus was..it was a good night..besides two folks, but they shall remain nameless...and shamed! I ended up crashing out at Brozy's somewhere in the range of 4:30-5. This morning was rough.

On the homefront...Joe and I assembled 90% of our entertainment center today, so movie watching center extravaganza is ready to rock.... But now the sleeping time is near, and I have laundry to fold. The excitement never stops my friends.

American Nightmare- "There's A Black Hole In The Shadow Of The Pru"

Everyone I ever loved
Went down in history...
The blue eyes came
The brown eyes left...
And the rest is misery
Dreams are trash
On the side of the road
All starry eyed - tongue all tied
There's something you should know
I could have died with you
And Boston is the reason
I'm feeling so blue - damn you
City lights and colder nights
I'm innocent (minus the fights)
Praying out loud for a winter of quiet
Friday nights are killing me
I fall asleep - pen in hand
There's something you should know
I could have died with you
And Boston is the reason
I'm feeling so blue
Cities aren't a way to cure a disease
And I don't even know
Why you listen to me
A razor wristed kid
Looking forward to ends
If love was a bridge
You'd be the one in the fens
"All the kids are fucking dead"
I write "with love and a gun to my head"
these days aren't going to last too long
(i know - i know - i know)
I'm drawing words from a tired heart
I'm drawing blood from a tired heart

ghost of christmas past....

2005-10-08T01:49:00.000-04:00

joey did a pictography...since I am unoriginal....i'm gonna steal his shit, though vary it a bit

this is a picture story of x-mas last year when you add alcohol into the equation........

This Ribbon Shit has GOT to Stop My Friends.....

2005-09-28T22:44:00.000-04:00

Been away for awhile...hanging out...working an assload per usual, but tonight, at this late hour I have stopped in to speak my mind on something that has been killing me lately....fucking ribbon magnets. So I suppose you have to see where I am coming from. I live in the suburbs..I hate it..but it is cheap. In general I enjoy driving, gas has been dampering said love a bit lately...but all in all being in my car is not a bad place. But the 95 commute...well that shit is as haggard as they come. I work 17 miles from my house...if I get to work in 45 minutes, that is a good day...1 hour thats an average day...an hour and a half, well my friends that is what i call a "falling down" day(reference the movie). So I spend a lot of time staring at the back of cars, and I have noticed that the fucking ribbons thing has to stop. You all know what I'm talking about...I believe the "support our troops" was the original...or maybe god bless the USA or some shit....but now there are more than likely 100 different ribbon magnets. I am baseing this theory on one SUV that I saw the other day....it had 8 ribbons across the back, in a big frowning rainbow. From a statistical standpoint...if one car had 8...there has to be hundreds out there. I cannot remember all of them but here are a few " support our troops" "support our sheriffs" "god bless the usa" "support breast cancer(?)" yay breast cancer "POW/MIA".....There were more, and they just got more and more ridiculous. So here is my problem..that shit is lame. If you wanna support one or all of your "ribbons" then donate your money/time to an agency that deals with them. The money you paid for that ribbon with, is going into some CEO's pocket..and he's sitting somewhere laughing at you. I guess they are a fiscal way to make people fel good about themselves...kinda like the american flags after 9/11....and we see how many of those people are still flying on cars....in time the magnets will go away too...but not soon enough. I think that I am going to make some that support my views "i support abortion" or "our president is an asshole" or "i support the working poor" and see how that goes over. And i know it is not just me, because I saw a little pimped out honda with a "support your local stripper" bow magnet...when the white boys start flyin' ribbons on honda's....things are in need of a change. Blah, ok rants over.

Switching gears, been hanging out/talking with lots of folks lately...and they have all been supportive...so I've been keeping my chin up, and trying to resume how I was doing things before. It has been almost a month, and times are still pretty rough....but whats done is done...I did all I could, now it is all up to fate and all that good shit. Also, Joe "danger" Anderson has moved into the ranch..which=awesome for those who don't know. He is trying to convince me to learn to ride his motorcycle....i would do it just so i could use the HOV....damn you traffic. Umm what else...uhh Stef is coming to town friday....then we are jetting up to Baltimore to see the decemberists in the PM, and watch the VTech vs WVU game in the AM...so it should be a full day of drunken endeavors. Umm alkaline trio oct 21....then next big thing is my return to Tallahassee NOV 4-6....so keep an eye out at po' boys for me and jules, and at poor pauls.....trying to get josh and jazz in town...be afraid. Yeah it's late, and 6am is a bitch...saw my breath this morning...ahhh, and even smelled wood smoke, my favorite time of year. Thanks to everyone who has been there for me..I'd list you all, but you know who you are. I'll be ok.

Song o' the day

The Smoking Popes- "I Was Right"

I wasted so much more than time
And the one with whom I was as one
Has now undone what came to be known as our love
Which could not contain all that which she'd become

I was flat out wrong
And with both hands on the days gone by
I gripped my eyes wide open
Because I can't sleep at night
The world is much too cold
Without someone there to hold me or to hold
That's the way it goes

And I always thought that I would die
If you ever told me goodbye
But it wasn't until tonight
Tonight, I found out I was right

I wasted almost all my life
Being so afraid to fail I hardly tried
I found a place to hide
I dove into you
I swam around, around inside

But I'm not the boy that you destroyed
I'm stronger than he was
I had to be to survive
I'm lucky to be alive
The me you left behind
Is still lying there
With his eyes froze open wide

And I always thought that I would die
If you ever told me goodbye
But it wasn't until tonight
Tonight, I found out I was right

Booze, Bro's, Metal.......and Bruises?

2005-09-19T13:02:00.000-04:00

So it is lunch time at work, which by the way really sucks today. But I guess the good news, is that I am here and still alive...not quite feeling right, but I'm breathing. Before I tell you folks about the weeked in Richmond, I would like to thanks Casby for having me down, and taking care of my ass on Sat night...without him, it could have turned out pretty bad. And just for the record, if I could afford to move down there I'd be down there this afternoon.... That being said..let the story begin.

So I guess the appropriate place to begin is Friday night, since it plays a key role in the scheme of things. So Friday, I go to happy-hour with some folks from work, have a few drinks, etc..and roll back to my house at about 8:30...yeah it was kind of like a happy 3 hour, but whatever. So on the drive home, Courtney calls and asks if I want to go see a show that a kid we knew was playing at the Blackcat in DC...so of course I'm down. So she picks me up and we head off to 14th street. We get there just in time to see the band play, which was awesome. Gaarde was there as well with Lynn(?) so that was an added bonus. We stay for two more bands, but they are absolute shite. Then we end up someplace in Maryland at a friend of Courtney's, have some wine, port, and talk till around 3:15 or so. I get home right around 4am..and go to sleep.

Saturday...I wake up at 7 am and go to work for my dad, yes on 3 hours of sleep. A bit scary when you think about it, handling powertools and metal and such.. So I work from around 7am-2pm and drive home, hit up the post office and call Casby to make sure that it is cool I come down, it is. So I leave somewhere around 6 or so. I roll into Richmond at like 7:15, Casby and I say our hello's and such, then he informs me of an awesome Metal show that is happening that night..so I was down. We then went Krogering for BBQ materials, and then hit the ABC....which could have been the fatal flaw. We head straight over to a bbq some kids Casby knew, had a few PBR's and a hotdog, played with the scheming trio of dogs that lived there, had a few conversations then headed back to Casby's. This is where things become blurred...The show would be starting soon, so we did a bit of pregaming. Now there are different ways to pregame, you can drink a bit to catch a buzz, you can drink a lil more to reduce costs at the bar, you can drink to be drunk before you left, and then there is where I was, I drank to not feel anything. This involved me basically chugging 1/3 of a bottle of captain in approx 20 min before we left. Ihave to admit, I knew what I was doing...and as it relates to my present situation, it bordered on self-abuse. But Casby did not promise that I would live through the night, but he did promise to get me home...good enough for me. So we walk to Nancy Raygun(aka the old Twister's) which by the way was celebrating 5 dollar pitcher night. And pretty much from the bar until Sunday morning is all just a blur. I remember beer, Tequila, Matt, John, Swaying in the bathroom stall, trying to sleep at the bar, Metal, mosh pit, err bed? Yeah it all ran together, all I know is that it all occured in a tiny timeframe, like we were home in bed by 1am....scary. But my goal of drinking till I was numb, panned out, and Casby as stated got me home, I think I died a lil bit, but I'm ok now. For those who can relate...think Irish Carbomb Night....then add Metal.

So Sunday....wake up...not feeling to great. And both of us are sore as shit, and have bruises all over. I have some on my ribs, my back, legs, and my knees are all scraped up....It had to be the mosh pit...but hell if I remember. Cazz had some too, but his neck hurt the most I think...cause he rocked too hard...if thats possible. Went in search of food...but mostly something to drink....cause my ass was arrid to say the least. After eating we hung out and listened to music, and then...because the abuse on Sat was not enough..we went to the Shockoe Craft Beer Festival. To my credit, I did not use all of my tickets, because my body, by this point was seriously yelling at me, and if I would have used all my tickets, he would have made a spectacle of me in public. But just hanging out at the fest was all the fun I needed, and I mean I tried like 5 beers, so I made an attempt. I think the Magic Hat "9" was my winner, and that guy really loved his job. But it was fun we rode a canal boat, saw the lucky strike smoke stack, witnessed belly button lint picking, an old man almost died from the heat right next to us, and a whole other crapload of unintentional comedy.

The rest of my time down there, consisted of food and conversation with Chris, which was really nice, just to be able to talk with someone these days. I think he was trying to keep my mind off things, cause I never got the chance to talk about the depressing stuff going on right now, it was just a good weekend of catching up. I'm sure I'll be heading down there soon enough, since my computer stole Chris's Blueline Medic cd, and because Chris is off most weekends, and it is always a blast. So that about sums up the weekend. Yesterday was horrible, my body was still hating me, but I laid down at 5:30...got up at 9..back to bed at 10:30 and just now got back up...(5:30am) and feel much better. So work will still suck, but at least I'll physically feel better. So thats all for now....... I do not have any pics of Casby and I, because I was lame and did not bring my camera out with us. So instead above pic is from my Pheonix stop of my Tallahassee------Monterey road trip, I call it....The Death Metal Pose!!!

Song Of The Day: Blueline Medic "Making the Noveau Riche"

You say I have to get a real life,
but I'm not sure how that in making someone
or other rich is any more real than making a niche for yourself.
I'm without a zack, a truth, a coin,
a kopeck or an elusive brass razoo.
But my dear rationalist, don't dream I couldn't care.
I too grow quickly bored of the clothes I wear.
So maybe I should go an get a real life,
real like cutting a fine figure
or scraping a deposit together for it, heaven forbid.
Just suppose I cannot live on taxes and goodwill forever.
But how is it that the problem just doesn't seem to press
while my fingers are themselves pressing hard against the neck?
I was sure that I suffered
and worked as hard as anyone I knew . . . well it seems I haven't.
I better damn well fix and make it look every inch as though
I do but still have to go and get a real life
and I've no doubt that it will happen.
Maybe I've put it off for too long now,
gonna see if I can't get something better than a . . . .

Maybe I'm amidst of a real life . . . .

Me And My McCubicle....a Love Story or My Life Inside Your Cube

2005-09-09T12:15:00.000-04:00

Today, I would like to introduce you to my McCubicle. She is gray, and always cold, but she puts up with me for 40 hours a week. She is your typical "Office Space" cubicle, ehh bout 5 feet tall, gray, and pseudo well-lit. So as you have already noticed. I got bored and took pictures...and am going to take you on a little tour of what you see.

Photo 1: As we zoom in a bit, you can see more of the essentials and the little touches I have made. On the left, we see a calendar, and all kinds of important looking stuff put up with thumb-tacks, yeah that was here, and has nothing to do with my job. I'll take em down sometime. But Most important is the white paper behind the soda can, it has every college football schedule for Division 1 on it. Err then there is my daily pile of essentials, soda, cell phone, ipod, keys, wallet, highlighters....I come prepared. And as you can see to the right of my computer screen I put up my personal private photo collection, and mini-football helmets, in addition right above the phone, I have started a concert ticket collection..rise against is up..more to come asap.........

Photo 2: This is a draw-back shot, that shows the extent of my massive work station..she hates it when I call her that. As you can see, on the left I have my office stuff, computer, some binders, phone, Diet Sunkist, iPod, some boxes of stuff that were here when I got here, my trusty letter folder machine(the white thing in the middle), on the right you will see my bookbag storage, and lunch table. Those binders up on top...Yeah I have no idea what the fuck those are....

Photo 3: My mini-football helmets..enough said.

Photo 4: This is my photo wall, yeah so it is four pictures taped to a piece of printer paper, you don't have to be a dick about it. We have the Kuwaiti Towers, a Picture from prom, a pic of some FSU kids at cabernet, and A beautiful day at St.George island......that may expand but it is staying for now.

So there she is, in all her glory!

Heading up to WVU after work today, so I can sit and talk with my sister for awhile.....I really need a heart to heart with the kid. Then I'll be killing my liver till sat night..rumors of a Indian Buffet sunday, proceeds go to the south for Katrina folks. Just an FYI I'm not doing any better...and I could really use a hug.

Song O' the day

The Ataris-I Won't Spend Another Night Alone (I've taken a bit of liberty with the lyrics;) )

A star up in the sky goes slowly passing by,
The lights below...they spell out your name.
You're comfort on my mind
and you're with me all the time.
And lots of feelings that I can't explain.

I won't spend another night alone.

Out of every girl I meet, no other can compete
I'd ditch 'em all for a night with you.
I know you don't believe you mean this much to me
But I promise you that you do.

If I had one wish this is what it would be...I'd ask you to spend all your time here with me,
And we'd be together forever.
We'd buy a small house in south central L.A.
Raise lots of kids then we'd both join a gang
Just as long as we're together.

The things you make me wanna do
I'd rob a Dairy Mart for you
I'd go to the pound and let all the cats (Dogs) go free
Just as long as you'd be with me.

I won't spend another night alone.

So I cheered for the defense......and Arrington won

2005-08-28T22:16:00.000-04:00

Yeah, so on Wed me and my boy joe get some food. After we call it an evening, he calls and asks what I'm doing friday....Turns out he had an extra ticket and parking pass to the Redskins/Steelers game. It is not like me to turn down a sporting event...especially a free one. So I show up to FedEx field and chill for a bit. I go in to find my seats, and I get all kinds of fucking lost. My ticket says its a lower suite, so I'm thinking I could find it. So I get on these escalators going to the club level, and that shit was awesome! All kinds of nice shit, and food..I was in football heaven. BUT...turns out I was in the wrong place...and my seats were a step above the awesomeness of the club level. So I finally make it to my floor, with the help of an old lady chillin on a chair in the elevator. So I get to "the ring" its a super nice floor with carpet and door after door of suites... So I get to where I'm supposed to be...and bless all that is holy it included leather stadium seats, sofas, recliners,free alcohol, and a sweet waitress named Hazel. The pics above are of the door to the suite, and what the game looked like from our dope ass seats. The only crappy part (at first) was that I did not know any of the folks there, because I did not work with them, but they were all hammered and we all became friends fast enough...one girl there had just graduated from FSU, so we talked a bit. All in all it was awesome, and something I may possibly never get the chance to do again. Shit like I could afford the 375 dollar face value of my ticket!!! Thats laughable man! Oh well....it only means one thing, one more week until the football begins.

Sidenote:
Steve, yes you can pee while the urinal is flushing...the flaw is that if you pee longer than the flush...you still get the sprinkles. And I mean really...why should I have to flush 4 times while peeing....its just an inconvenience.

Today I am beginning a campaign...

2005-08-26T15:39:00.000-04:00

My campaign will focus on the development of a splash-proof wall urinal. I know that you may giggle at the idea, but come on guys think about how great this would be. For you girls out there reading this, with no frame of reference..hold a water hose 4-5 inches from a concrete wall and turn it on. Now admittedly the psi of a urine stream is not as great as a water-hose, but imagine the same thing to scale. Those urinal engineers out there have to have some better design that using porcelain!!! Why can't it be some type of foam material that absorbs the piss...or how about some type of gel to soften the blow. I am just tired of getting that warm sprinkling whenever I am wearing shorts. Yeah, that sounds gross right? Well, it is gross, and that is the kind of nonsense us guys deal with every day. And the regular toilet is not much better, with the dreaded "tip-dip"...use your imagination. That water is cold. Yeah, so fuck urinals. This maybe why i prefer cars...or British pubs with bad karaoke, or shrubs, you get the picture. The rant is over.

Switching gears, The Mighty Joe Danger has hooked me up with a lower suite level ticket to the redskins/steelers game tonight. I'll take pictures.........and I am pretty sure we will have our own waitress...thank god i get paid weekly. Who is gonna get me home from Landover though????? Fuck it, i'll figure it out.

I will be adding stupid uses of the english language once and awhile to these. The first is...

-Hot water heater........who heats hot water?

Feeling Kind of Loney

2005-08-21T00:02:00.000-04:00

So I suppose the point of keeping this said blog, is to write about stuff whether it be a story, a comic situation, informational, etc.. So tonight as I sit here, I'm feeling a bit lonely and the nostalgic Sam is peeking through, so I guess it is time for a heartfelt entry.... So yeah, prob not much comedy..so if you are looking for a laugh..check back soon.

So I'm sitting here, and I am having one of those stereotypical moments, where I ask myself if I have been a good person through the years. I guess most people do thiswhen they know they are going to die and such, but that seems a little self-involved and petty, doesn't it. I mean why not ask the question more often...if nothing else you either feel good you have done your best, feel shitty and want to change, or be indifferent to the situation. Ah well, I have my flaws..but somethings I have done ,well, lets just say I wish i had'nt. But there is one thing I need to type about at this late hour.

To Suhail(4/1980-7/2000):
To Suhail or better known as Sid. You were my best friend, and you died way to young. I hate the fact that your buried less that 20 min away from me, yet I have only gone to visit once since carrying you there on your funeral. I do not exactly know why I don't visit, but I have a feeling a big part is because I never really have dealt with you dying. I spoke at your funeral, some giberish about thanatopsis, and since then I have thought of much better meaningful things to say, and it makes me angry, because I could have done better that day. I also hate the fact that when you died, I did not hang out with you all that often. I know that you were in a new relationship..and I know how that goes. Know I realize being jealous of you spending all your time with your girlfriend was just me being a stupid kid. I hate the fact that days go by when I do not think about you. After you died, I thought about you all the time, not a day would go by without thoughts of you. Now I find myself going for periods of time without being reminded of you, and it makes me feel shitty. I also hate the fact that at some point I stopped dedicating my first drink of the night to you, I can not pinpoint when it happened, but now I cannot even remember the last time I did it. I also hate the fact that your parents treated you like shit when you were alive, and only after you died do they feel sorry. This is something I cannot seem to forgive, even to this day. And the strange part is I know it is wrong to hold a grudge, but really your mom can fuck herself for all I care. And I know you would say the same thing. I hate the fact that all the grownups at your funeral said that it was all part of Gods plan, and there was a reason why "god" took you. Yeah fuck all that nonsense too, as I am still waiting for some kind of reason. I also hate the fact that none of us go to say goodbye to you. I hate the fact that I had to see you in your casket, because it made me realize that there was no mistake, and that you really were dead. I am however greatful, that I cannot remember what you looked like..which is better because with the make-up you did not look like yourself. And most of all, I hate the way I treated Angie at your funeral. We had been dating for two years, and during all of it I resorted back to the kids that I grew up with and shut her out. This is something that I can never undo, and will never be able to accept. There was no excuse for me to treat the most important person in my life like a total stranger. She had known you for 2 years, and loved you as much as the rest of us. I only hope that she has it in her heart to understand that I give no excuse for acting the way I did, and it is something not worthy of forgiveness. I guess that is all I have to say right now, I would say all that rest in peace, we'll meet again soon bullshit, but you know none of us believe any of that shit. If I remember correctly, your theory was that some old rich guy wrote the bible in the way he wanted things to be. And I say it is as good a theory as any. So thanks for the good times, and I hope you considered me as good a friend as I considered you.----Sammy

So yeah, I would not say that I feel any better after writing that, but I do feel that it was something that needed to be done. That being said, it is late, I'm lonely, and I have to work uber early tomm..so it is bed for me.

There is only one song that is appropriate,

Alkaline Trio- You're Dead

What the hell is your name
And can you explain this mess
It seems you're playing a game
Where you only know how to take out the best

Cause if assholes could fly
This place would be busier than O'Hare
There's proof in the sky
It's as thick as our skulls yet it's thinner than air

I have something to say
If the chip off your shoulder should fall to your chest
Get it off right away
Cause if you don't then it won't be in peace that you rest
It's just a matter of time
That we all go away to a better place I'm told
It all sounds well and fine
But without you around I feel nothing but cold

And I now have nothing
But your heartbeat in my head
And a photograph of my traveling friend

So what the hell is your name
And can you explain this mess
It seems you're playing a game
Where you only know how to take out the best

Cause if assholes could fly
This place would be busier than O'Hare
There's proof in the sky
It's as thick as our skulls yet it's thinner than air

And I now have nothing
But your heartbeat in my head
And a photograph of my traveling friend
And I became nothing when I found out you were dead
When I found out I'd never see you again
And all the time they took talking in circles
To get them off the hook would take miracle workers
We're nowhere near prepared there's
no way of knowing
Why don't they just admit they're scared
Cause its already showing

And I now have nothing
But your heartbeat in my head
And a photograph of my traveling friend

And I now have nothing
But your heartbeat in my head
And a photograph of my traveling friend
And I became nothing when I found out you were dead
When I found out I'd never see you again

A tech guy actually said "Bonerific" and the anatomy of a rock show

2005-08-18T16:41:00.000-04:00

Hey all,

I have about 20 minutes left at work, and i have nothing to do really. I have been getting more stuff to do lately, which I am glad about, sitting here with nothing to do gets real boring at times. But overall the job is not bad, however I have been getting a crash course in Access lately....and these guys do some insane-o stuff, nothing my computer science class prepared me for. So yeah.. a guy at the next cubicle (lol) got a new PC today, and the tech guy actually said it was Bonerific. Wild.

Switching gears... Went and saw Rise Against, last night(wed) at the 9:30 club, and I'd have to say that those guys fuckin killed. The only shitty part of the night was the opening acts...which were, the loved ones, comeback kid, and from autumn to ashes...which were all what we would consider ass. So yeah, now I realize how easy it is to get there via metro from my work, i'll be at that piece whenever some good show rolls through. Speaking of up coming shows bought tickets for rilo kiley, the decemberists, and alkaline trio today, all those shows are kicking off in baltimore in Sept and October.. thats all for now I suppose. Tonight is britpop dance night upstairs and 80's alt pop downstairs at the blackcat....i'll take pictures.

50,000 Watts of Maximum rock...and that don't matter at all

2005-08-06T01:20:00.000-04:00

Hello there...I know you missed me, I mean sure you can try to hate me, but you can't really stay mad can you? I thought so. So yeah I am officially back in the NOVA, and after a good week of cleaning, the ranch is up and operational. Now for you virgins out there, I do not actually live on a ranch per se.. But my house does sit on a bunch of acres in the middle of a DC suburb, hence the reference. Umm I finished my first week at work, and it was not that bad 35 min in the morn 45 min home, not bad at all getting to Alexandria. The people seem nice, and being I am living rent free, the pay will allow me to save up some money. It is kinda lonely livin in the house alone, but in september Joe Danger will be moving in with me, which will fill the void, and then some. Blackass is making this place his home as well, however he is currently on a diet...and is none to happy with his dad. Kinda hard hanging out with all the old crew, cause they live 30 north or 90 min south these days (arlington,richmond respectively) but I am managing. Went to a Nationals game tonight---refer to picture(sorry it sucks, used my camera...forgot my nikon at Zachs...IDIOT). Lots of shows coming to DC and Baltimore, so pretty stoked about that, plus the orioles and the united...shit you know i'll be there. And the thing that I enjoy most about being home.....real news! not that low budget bush league bullshit....it's laughable man. Aye, well bed time for me........

i'm still alive..sorta

2005-07-30T11:12:00.000-04:00

hey to all my loyal readers, yes i am still alive...no internet at my house yet...comcast is the devil yo. Anyways, it being NOVA... I found a job yesterday. I am now an administrative assistant at Baker Engineering in Alexandria. To begin, it looks like I will be stuffing envelopes...but they are paying me over 30 grand to do so, soooo I'm not complaining. Yeah ok, so I'll write more once I get internet at my house. But I do have pictures of the Puffenbarger ranch!

The Count-Down Has Begun

2005-06-12T13:28:00.000-04:00

So I have made my rounds with a bunch of people, others are a bit more elusive. But now that it is common knowledge, I'll write about it on here with no reservations.

At the end of July, not really sure of a specific date, I will be returning to Woodbridge. So I am making it official that my time in Tallahassee is limited. I have been see-sawing on the decision for awhile now, and after weighing my options...I think heading back to DC is the best choice. And to be honest I am pretty excited. To explain why it is a good deal, I'll have to go through a little story.

It starts in the early 50's. My grandparents, on my dads side move to woodbridge and acquire 30 some acres of land. They build a house, build a 1-acre pond and for awhile my grandpa runs a saw-mill on the property. (Flash forward to the early 70's) My parents get married, and as a wedding present, they recieve 2 acres to build a house for themselves. This house is where my family and I lived our entire lives, that is until a few years ago. My parents decide to build a new house, in which they will retire, and sell the house in woodbridge. After all the dust settled, my aunt ended up buying the house in Woodbridge..and ta da the mortgage is paid off and the house is in the family still.

So now you know all that, I can explain why going home is a good deal for me right now. The fact is, I can live in my house in Woodbridge rent-free. All I will be responsible for is paying for Electricity, cable, and internet. And the other big reason for moving back there, is because jobs are plentiful, and they pay more. For most the trade off between cost of living, and hourly wages in NOVA do not really pan out that well, but when I can live in a place for practically no money....I am assuming I can get some money saved rather quickly and decide on what my next move will be. As for now I plan on staying for a year, and then see where things stand. Hopefully, in that time, I can fund a change.

So, now it is out in the open, so I guess I'll be around Tally for a bit longer, and will make an effort to say goodbye to all the folk here. I will for sure miss a lot of people here, but it had to end eventually.

I'll keep this page updated with news as it comes to me.....

Song of the day- Five State Drive, Less than Jake

Got on the 47.
Transfer to the 89.
Left town, east-bound pass,
saw the city size.
You know its hard,
to leave your past behind,
as I pass the crummy bars,
and beat up cars,
nothing will change your mind.
By now, think I've found
Things changed just don't look
that way to me. Or it just looks
that way to me.
By now, think I've found
Things changed just look
re-arranged to me.
Never looked that way to me.

A Half-past 7,
now I'm on the 95.
Sick of malls, and alcohol
just passed the next state line.
I know its hard,
to leave your past behind,
as I think the corner creeps,
and dirty streets
nothing will change your mind.
There's no turning back this time.

By now, think I've found
Things changed just don't look
that way to me. Or it just looks
that way to me.
By now, think I've found
Things changed just look
re-arranged to me.
Never looked that way..

And when goin up's like goin' on
and never going back, no.
Its just like giving up, yea.
And when goin offs like goin' on
It feels like going nowhere,
going nowhere fast.

By now, think I've found
Things changed just don't look
that way to me. Or it just looks
that way to meeeeee!
By now, think I've found
Things changed just look
re-arranged to me.
Never looked that way to me.

By now, think I've found
(Never looked that way to me.)
Things changed just don't look
that way to me.
By now, think I've found
(Never looked that way to me.)
Things changed just don't look
that way to me.
By now, think I've found
(Never looked that way to me.)
Things changed just don't look
that way to me.

Never looked that way to me.

Whatever happened to six-shooters and ten gallon hats............

2005-06-09T00:27:00.000-04:00

George Carlin is famous for doing a skit about what he terms the pussification of the modern day male. He cited cases that were funny, but I am here today to add a few tales of my trip home, which strengthens the point made by Mr. Carlin.

So if you were not aware, I flew back to the DC-Metro area this past weekend. I will comment on that trip at the end of this entry. So I guess my little rant begins at the Tallahassee regional airport. Now it is a little inside joke between Joey and I about how if either one of us is ever caught wearing a cell phone on our belt, we have permission to kill the other one where he stands. So it goes without saying I was in utter shock at what I saw flying out friday. There was this little man (approx. 5'7'') in a nice business suit with four (4) yes four cell phones on his belt. He had two ordinary cellphones and two Blackberry doo-flops alternating on his belt. No this was just mindblowing. I mean what could this man do for a living that would require 4 cell phones to be carried at two times. I mean two is sort of understandable being one is personal and the other being for work, but there is still no excuse for wearing them on your belt. And this ghastly display makes me think back to the old days, way before any of us were around. Back to the days when a status symbol was for example a pair of six shooters, a good horse, or a nice hat. I know the word "manly" is a cliche and all that nonsense, but seriously 4 cell phones! I am guessing that at least two of those were not even connected to any kind of service. If I had to take a stab in the dark, I would guess that this man had little guy syndrome aka Napoleon syndrome, and he used his holster of phones as some sort of way to announce to others that he in fact was more important than the next guy. Completely ridiculous. I do not know what is happening to the world out there, but someone needs to drop a really big bomb.

Guys? Has it really reached a time that in order for girls to like you, you have to pretend that you are gay? So I was at a party, and for obvious reason I was not there for the purpose of meeting girls, I was there to see an old friend from school. So there were mostly girls there, and I know I was the "new" guy so I was not expecting a super warm reception, but all in all everyone there was pretty in to themselves, and were not wanting to even converse with me...but ya know I did not take offense. Then halfway through the night this guy show up, whom after meeting, listening to him talk, and watching his maneurisms, come to the conclusion he was gay. Nothing wrong with that, nothing at all. The peculiar thing is that every girls was fighting for his attention..which is not unusual, gay guys tend to have a lot of straight girls as friends, but later I found out that he was not gay, which completely blew my mind. As I do not know this kid well enough to make any fair assumptions, I'll have to speculate. Like I said, this world is becoming a scary place.

Ok so that is enough for today, I'll write about my trip home tommorrow.....was nothing too exciting, but it will kill some time at work.

Timeline:
July 1-4 Monterey
July 5 Alkaline Trio in Orlando

Song of the Day Rilo Kiley-So Long (appropriateness level...10)

Watch me fly away
Through the night sky yeah
Now that all you touched
Has finally turned gray
And roads can't hold us down
Winds will move us around
With no need to return
to this gray town
Wanna bet I can tell
You've been in bed for too long
So let's just say so long
And I watched you at the cove
You read on rocks below
And I turned home
without so much as hello
Wanna know where I go
I've been away for too long
And it's hard to leave
when I haven't seen
You in so long
And if we
had just held out for tomorrow
We might have seen
What seemed so far away
We didn't even bother to stay
There it goes I can tell
You're gonna to keep
your eyes to the ground
Waiting for something
to finally come around
Tell you that you knew
That you weren't wrong
And it's finally time for so long

Ahh..it's been awhile man

2005-06-09T00:01:00.000-04:00

Yeah, I know this Blog is the lifeline for many readers, especially Mike back in Baltimore. I did not realize that he was such an avid follower of the life and times of Sam, but he is. I guess the real reason I have not written in a long time is because I have been pretty confused lately myself. Things are starting to play out though, and the dust is starting to settle and things are for sure becoming more clear on what I need to do with myself.

So basically, I need to talk with a few folks in person in the near future, because I don't feel a blog should be used to disclose secrets or controversial news when there is no real opportunity for you folks to react/respond how you feel about the matter. I will say that things have gotten a bit crazy, and well my announcements will shock and awe...lol. So yeah I am assuming I need to make a few trips to Poor Pauls with some folks, a trip or two to the Leon Pub, and at least one trip for mexican before I'll write about it on here. Yeah so call me a dick for being so secretive, but anyone who knows me knows that important stuff stays private with me... What are you gonna do, it is just how I am.

Side note: Rilo Kiley was awesome, okkervil river..awesome, the brunettes...interesting, but also great. Brunettes are Kiwi's JJ, u hear of them while you were over there?

So stayed tuned...and big news will be coming your way via the eeeeeenternet

Song of the moment Okkervil River- For Real

Some nights I thirst for real blood, for real knives, for real cries. And then the flash of steel from real guns in real life really fills my mind. Then I really miss what really did exist when I held your throat so tight. And I miss the bus as it swerved from us and almost came crashing to its side. Sometimes the blood from real cuts feels real nice when it’s really mine. And if you want it to be real, come over for a night, we can really, really climb, and those blue bridge lights might really burn most bright while we watch that dark lake rise. And if you really want to see what really matters most to me, we can just take a real short drive. Just a drive into the dark stretch, long stretch of night, will really stretch this shaking mind. And this room, unlit, unheated, and the ceiling striped, and the dark black blinds.... I want to know this time if you’re really finally mine. I need to know that you’re not lying, and so I want to see you tried. And I don’t want to hear you say it shouldn’t really be this way, because I like this way just fine. And there’s nothing quite like the blinding light when that curtain’s cast aside, and no attempt is made to explain away the things that really, really, really are behind.

darts

2005-06-02T23:27:00.000-04:00

darts
Originally uploaded by milorlz.

ohh boy

just daydreamin....

2005-05-13T08:54:00.000-04:00

So I am at work, and I am bored, and tired of reading Wolves of the Calla for the moment, so I thought I would chime in on some random thoughts, revelations, and questions I have in the world.

Why is it only the ugly girls were pregnant in high school? I have my theories....but could someone throw me some opinions.

Why is the word "cunt" the most offensive word in the english language for women to hear? It is not that bad is it?

There are 5,000 delicious beers in the world, why do people still insist on drinking things like bud light and natural light?

It is only in Florida that drivers can make right and left turns at negative miles per hour.

If there is a God up there, I bet he hears all your prayers....but he has to say no to most does'nt he? I mean, jesus was the nice one remember...God is pissed his son turned out to be a pussy.

Why is it if you are a male, you can never convince a gay man that you are not gay? I mean you can try, but then they just treat it like AA and claim denial is the first sign.

Why is it most people around here are lame ass until they have company in town, then they they try to act like they own the town at all times? Does'nt this make you even more lame?

You know you are getting old, when you walk into Best Buy and are blown away by the new Whirlpool washer and dryer set.....I have done this, therefore I am old.

Is there really a point of spending 25,000 dollars on parts to pimp out a car that you bought for 2500 at the police auction, it just does not add up to me.

When you sit down and think about it, is'nt England responsible for a lot of bad shit through the years? ex. israel/palestine, india/pakistan.

Is it just me or do people take the whole facebook thing way to seriously, I have heard of people pouting because others did not update their profile soon enough....it is getting to be a sad world.

When you get married, is there some rule I do not know about where conversations have to be boring and often involve landscaping?

This might seem normal to some, but Wisconsin seems to produce a lot of crazy serial killers....kinda strange.

Why are there so many tampon commercials on during "the contender", it is just baffling.

Your cellphone conversations are boring, leave the fucking room!!

I really hate girly girls...you can be feminine, sexy, attractive without being corny and acting like you are still in high school.

I hate when a scene in a movie is so bad, it gives me goosebumps. Like a really bad voiceover, ex. in a loud scene, say a concert, they pan to one spectator and you can hear what they are saying...

Why is it that before a concert, they always play music that no one has ever heard before? It is like the sound board guy is playing some kind of joke with the audience. I want in!

Ok so there are a few rants and questions, I'll be adding some more as they come to me.

Lyrics of the day: Bad Religion-Against the Grain

three thousand miles of wilderness overcome by the flow, a lonely restitution of pavement, pomp and show, i seek a thousand answers, i find but one or two, i maintain no discomfiture, my path again renewed, against the grain, that's where i'll stay, swimming upstream, i maintain against the grain, here labelled as a lunatic, sequestered and content, there ignored and defeated by the government, there's anoriented public who's magnetic force does pull, but away from the potential of the individual, against the grain..., the flow is getting stronger with smaller increments of time and eddies of new ideas are increasingly hard to find, you need all that the other has, it is your right to seize the day, but in all your acquisitions you will soon be swept away, against the grain..., there's a common consensus and an uncomfortable cheer, a reverberating chorus that anyone can hear, it sings "leave your cares behind you, just grab tenaciously", this lulling sense of purpose will destroy us rapidly, against the grain...

some photos

2005-05-11T10:05:00.000-04:00

Here are some pictures of my road trip. Angie is gonna send me some more when she gets the chance to download them on her computer, so check back every now and again for the full set.

Also, check out this article regarding the accidents that held me up last week on I-10. I guess it was good i took that frontage road, because the highway was shut down overnight.

Final Stage

2005-05-09T06:55:00.000-04:00

So if the drive into Monterey was not sick enough, the actual city was unbelievable. It is hard to describe the city really. I mean, it reminded me of a really upscale Morgantown built on the Pacific Ocean. The landscape was really hilly like Mo'town, there were very few “chains” to be found. Most of the stores/restaurants were privately owned, and there was no shortage of any of these. There was a Fisherman's wharf, which was basically a dock filled with restaurants and stores, and had kind of a fair feel to it, lots of people, street performers etc… Then there was cannery row, a strip downtown which used to be the biggest sardine producing plant in the world, refer to Steinbeck if you have any questions. Then there was a historic state park in the middle which was a well preserved example of what the town looked liked when it was ran by the Spaniards. I have pictures of all these places, so no need trying to imagine these things. The coolest thing I think is that in Monterey Bay there were sea otters and seals swimming around. This was quite an awesome sight. I guess it is comparable to when someone visits me in Florida and I show them alligators in the wild. On Saturday while looking for a German restaurant Angie's dad suggested, we found ourselves kinda lost and paying a $8.50 entry fee to something called 17 mile drive. As we found out, this was way worth the money. This 17 mile drive took us through some of the most sick scenery I have ever seen, especially spending most of my days on the east coast. Ocean views, rocky bluffs, awesome trees, sick mansions, you name it. We also go to see the infamous Pebble Beach Golf course, I took a picture for Joey of one of the holes, fucking awesome. I spent all the time I could with Angie while I was there and am happy that I did. Did a lot of walking, talking, and hanging out. It was a great stress-free end to a week of driving. The only bad part was having to leave this afternoon to return to Florida. But we will see, I may be finding myself out there again before too to long. Currently I am on an airplane doing what took me 40 hours to do, in only 4 hours. I should be getting into Tally at around 8:30, and will probably be delirious, especially since I have to work at 1pm….am I crazy? Maybe a little bit, but I am glad I took this trip. I mean how many people can say they have crossed the country solo, and having decided to do this less than a week before setting off on my way, I hit no major snags, not a bad deal really. So this trip is coming to its conclusion, would I do it again.. well I would prefer a partner to drive with, but if a situation arose I would not think twice about doing it over.

Current altitude: 38998 feet
Current Speed: 577 mph
People awake on my flight: less than 10
Sanity on a scale from 1-10: 4
Decibels from the engines: 40
Decibels from people snoring: approx 80

Thus concludes my travel Blog, hope you enjoyed following me around. I will be posting a link to my pictures, as soon as I get them all on my computer and labeled accordingly.

Stage Drei: Monterey

2005-05-09T06:50:00.000-04:00

So After sitting around and having a few drinks with the guys wed night, I crashed the fuck out, and found myself getting up around 11am the next day. I had enough time for a shower before we started out Cinco de Mayo the way it should always be, with some sushi. I cannot tell you the name of the sushi place ye went to, but it was nice as hell. It had a cool sleek feel to it, I do not like sushi, so I obviously represented with the steak teriyaki, and it was delicious. We hung out there for a good while, having some laughs and catching up on stuff. Once that stage was complete, we headed back to the new Elegy mansion, and got a cab for an early start on the celebrations. So I'm guessing it was 1:30 or so when we got to Dos Gringos Trailer Park, and I think Craig described it best when he said it was Pirates of the Caribbean gone horribly wrong. So this place was a bar in Tempe. It had an outside bar, and upstairs bar, an inside bar, and a huge parking lot filled with things to ring in the holiday aka a swimming pool and other fun things. For a better grasp of the situation I will be posting pictures of the entire road trip as soon as I get my hands on all of them. So I start things off with a corona, and quickly switch gears to the house margaritas, which were also delicious. From there I do not know exactly what happened, hence I will be referring to the photos as well to re-fresh my memory. I do remember a few wild things, a bunch of frat guys, some dude with the biggest arms I have ever seen, skeletor lady, tequila limbo(craig won that shit), water-balloon dodgeball, some tall jose cuervo girl, and a few other blurry memories. What I do know is Craig and I were supposed to go get some delicious Mexican candy and some Mexican food when ryan got home, but we passed out on the couch at 9:30 or so and did not move until the next morning. I remember moments during the night, because I basically slept through a party at their house, but I was passed the fuck out! So yeah I rolled off the couch sometime before 6 am and was on my way to beautiful, not so sunny California.

So the drive was pretty un-eventful for the most part, though on this stretch I was the most tired. Once getting past the flatlands of Arizona and California, the drive was unbelievable and erased any thoughts I was having about being crazy for driving cross-country by myself. I drove through some awesome mountains, by some beautiful lakes, through huge pine forests, you name it and I saw it, all concluding with my last 30 miles following the pacific ocean, which may be too damn cold to swim in, but is much more beautiful than the Atlantic. So my next entry will cover the Monterey peninsula, aka the place I would live if I were rich.

Trip Update: Final driving Leg
Miles traveled 2710
Hours spent in car approx 40
Doneness of my left arm: Well done teetering on crispy
Ass: calloused and sweaty
Body Odor: something like a Wendy's cheeseburger extra onions
Amount of cops spotted along highway: 2
Any Regrets: Not a One

Stage Zwei.....Phoenix

2005-05-05T13:27:00.000-04:00

So Wed began at 4am, by me rolling out of my bed and getting in the car with my sisiter. I had to leave my car off base for obvious reason, so this was a pain for my sister...but she loves me. We get off base, and drive around for almost an hour, and cannot find where I left my car, so we drive all the way back to her house and wake her husband up....he drops her off at work/PT, and gets me to the car. 6am I am on the road.

It is raining...suck ass..and I am on some ass-backward highways going through Texas, nothing to major occurred during this phase. Some 3 hours later, I find my way back on to I-10. Now the speed limit is 75, so I am cruising between 80-85 and things are going great. For the record, Texas is too fucking big, even for sonias ego...it's a joke, laugh. So yeah like 400 hours go by and I eventually get to the awesome state of New Mexico....this is where the fun starts. Obviously I have no idea where I am in New Mexico, but there is a cra accident, and I-10 is stopped...I'm thinking nothing big, cool. Turns out a Merceded SUV hit a tractor-trailer and both were proper fucked. They had to come with the helicopters to get them and shit. So I get out of my car and ask the trucker guy mext to me whats up, on top of it being a fucked up accident, the truck was carrying chemicals.... so now i'm like goddamn...goddamn. So I see a frontage road, maybe i can get on that and hook up on i 10 again. So I drive the mighty chevy cavalier acros the median, dodging stagebrush and lizards ad shit, i'm in the west remember, get on I-10 east get to the frontage road, and there is a cop saying that another truck has flipped 2 miles down the way, this time carrying explosives so I have the option of traveling all out of the way and eventually gettingt back on 10, or going down the frontage road a few miles and sit with all the other trucks. I do that. 3.5 hours later, this trucker guy wakes me up, because i fell asleep, and says we can go. Shitty... shitty. When I am starting out trying to get to speed, I think I killed a roadrunner...let me rephrase that, I killed the shit out of that roadrunner. I do not think a tire touched it, but it went under the car and got shot out the other side...feathers flying all over and shit...my day was going great.

I finally roll into phoenix at 10:30...tired as shit, but had a few drinks hung out with my boys and went to bed.

Miles yesterday 1049
Hours 17.5
darkness of my left arm...medium well

Today is cinco de mayo, starting the festivities at 11:30 with some traditional mexican sushi, then out for the drinking to begin.

Departure for California is 6am tomm morning. Boom goes the Dynamite.

Stage Uno....Fort Hood, Texas

2005-05-05T02:22:00.000-04:00

All I have to say is that it took me 13 hours to get to Fort Hood, 4 of those being on some back-ass one lane roads through Texas....you can imagine the fun.

Stayed with My sis, her husband and their two kids(a black and a chocolate lab) Did a lil unsucessful fishing, toured Fort Hod a few times and had a low stress visit, exactly what I wanted. I just got into Phoenix, I will write all about that trip tommorrow...it involves fire,chemicals,helicopters,and roadrunners....you do not wanna miss it!

And It begins...

2005-05-01T22:58:00.000-04:00

So yeah, it is 11pm on sunday, and i begin my quest to conquer I-10 tommorrow at 5am. For those who do not know I am on a week of self discovery, involving a drive to beautiful sunny California.....alone. Here is my tentative trip....monday night I get to Austin and stay with Sarah, spend tuesday with her.....Wed night get to Phoenix......and stay with the Elegy Boys until fri.....Friday afternoon arrive in sunny California. What is that you are saying?? I'm crazy?? Yeah a lil bit, but the trip is gonna be worth it. AS long as I can find the Eenter-net along the way i'll try to blog the days as they go. So yeah I am off to bed...

A special congrats go out to Sonia, Meghan, and Mia.

Lyrics for the day/trip --- Are we there yet, The Ataris

I think that we're lost again and this looks like the shitty side of town. We're running out of gas and the sun is going... down... down... down. Time to turn around and start heading back in the right direction now, but my map is upside down. I just wanna make it to the show, but I don't think that we're gonna go. I can see the headline now... "Four punks found dead again... We know you don't care... but, film at ten. And, now on to sports." Things are looking bleak, everybody thinks that I'm a geek. We're hiding all our cash, my fingernails are digging in the dash. "Why didn't you ask for directions? What Cracker Jack box did you find your license in? You stupid piece of shit... I'll never ride with you again!" I just wanna make it to the show, but I don't think that we're gonna go. "Just pull over let me drive!" Everybody wants me dead. I think the club is up ahead. It feels good to be alive!

Loving a girl who does not love back is like winning at the special olympics, you may win the race, but you are still a retard.

2005-04-28T09:39:00.000-04:00

So the end of the semester is upon us, and things with me have not changed really, still bobbing along through life......things are starting to become more clear...and futures are more forseeable, but things can change minute to minute so I will report it like that. Because of this "sad" time of the year on campus I will post a great sttory from my life that involves one-sided lust, heartbreak, and happy endings.... Yeah.. so sit back and enjoy another chapter in the "Life of Sam".

So I guess we will have to rewind about........eight years or there about.putting us at Gar-Field High School, 1998. It is my senior year.

At some point, I cannot exactly pin point the moment, i fell in with a crowd of friends that I felt comfortable with...it is funny how things like that happen. Of course these kids are what Joey would refer to as the "edgies", but nonetheless I found people I liked. By the time senior year rolled around, I was an acting member in this group of friends, this meaning i had a semi-upper level standing in the caste system. If I were in a band, I would have jumped a tier..but I was in THE band in high school, but luckily this did not knock me down any. Ok ok ok...

So physics, yes the most romantic class you can take in high school. I find myself at a table with three other seniors. Needless to say, we did not get much work done, and being the only seniors in the class, people just kinda stared at us a lot...cause we were trouble. So anywhoo, one of the girls at my table was also a member of the mentioned group of friends I associated with. Now, before my senior year, we were aquaintances, but as my senior year progressed we talked, hung out, and became really good friends. The kind of friend that you could talk to anything about. So obviously, I "fell in love".. cause that is what high school guys do. Problem with that, she was and had been with a guy for a long period of time. And also on that point, he was in band, which made him an upper-class member of the caste. So things went on the same, we became close friends, and then the day came....the guy cheated on her, and they were splittsville! Now I may burn in hell for thinking the way I did, but this was great news for me. Cause obviously, now that she was single she would realize that I was right in front of her the whole time. Ehhh so it did not exactly go like this.

The year went on...and things were good and then it came to that point of the year when we were starting to think about prom. Now like I am all the time, i kept getting to nervous to ask her to prom. This mainly because when it comes to girls, I myself am a girl. So we are in physics one day and she drops the bomb, that she is going to prom with one of our other friends. Now this friend did not know that i liked her, and in no way asked her in a harmful way. They were both single, and friends and figured it would be a good idea. Of course, this killed me. I wish i could have seen my face when she dropped that one, probably lost color and muscle control. So I did what every mature high school boy does when being hit with such news....moped and pouted, feelin sorry for myself. I remember feeling physically sick that first day...and in a real hateful mood. Looking back there was no reason to be mad at her, i mean i had no more of a stake in her as some guy from the street, but at the same time I was young and stupid, and was really upset.

But every cloud has a silver lining. Being as close as we were, she noticed that something was wrong with me. It took me awhile to come out with it, but I did eventually, and she reacted in a way I did not expect. She actually talked with the mutual friend, and he was cool about her going with me to prom. Sweet ass! So I was walking on clouds and shit, here...the girl i liked did that for me.. it had to be a good thing. So I got all my prom stuff in order, and things were going great, we were hanging out, having a good time, and I was ready to go. But then the silver lining split, and the rain came back.

So about two or so weeks before prom, the guy she had been seeing started talking to her. I knew this was bad news, but hey..I was taking her to prom. Yeah, so maybe I was'nt taking her to prom. So two weeks before prom we are hanging out, and she tells me that she is going to go to prom with her ex, who has now become the ex ex boyfriends again. But, she had also planned this out really well as she had found me a date, who ironically enough had the same kind of crush on me as I had on the other girl. Problem was, this girl was crazy, and I had no sort of attraction. But I end up going, and having a crap-tastic time.

I never really told her how much all of this killed me inside, but I mean if she did not realize that it did, then fuck her I guess. Things were cool between us after that, i suppose. We still hung out and such, but I realized nothing would ever come of us two, and it hurt, but eventually I worked through all of it. I went away to college, she ended up moving up north, and has since almost completely cut herself off from the old friends. And good for her, starting up a new life where no one knows her.

This story basically came about because said girl will be getting married this coming thursday, to a cool kid from up north. I got to see her over winter break, and meet her husband to be and they looked truely happy, so good for them. I mean I really hope things work out for them. I realized after meeting up with her over break, that things would have never worked out between us, which i suppose is reassuring.....but it still hurt.

Lyrics of the day "she took him to the lake"-Alkaline Trio

do you remember the story of the boy and his first date? she took him to the lake and he fell in love. she spent one summer waking up between his arms. she told him how good that felt, told him he was the one. and then she went away, his calls were not returned. he went to see her, but her eyes were burning a different stare. the focus was somewhere else. and that feeling had somehow disappeared.

do you remember when they both drove out of state? stealing kisses behind her cousins back. with a love so strong tell me who could wait? when it seems so right and it feels so right. man, it had to be right. when it seems so right and it feels so right. man, it had to be right. gotta be right. but then she went away and she's not coming back. and i'm pretty sure that boy is staying in tonight.

So I'm lazy

2005-04-28T08:00:00.000-04:00

Ok, I have been too lazy to post anything in awhile. But I am going to get on top of that in the near future. In the mean time I found a site, that accurately describes the majority of girls on this campus. By the way this post was inspired by Mia, who also hates the 75% club.

The Yoko
Watch out for this one guys. She has the ability to break up a group of guys that have been together since the days of eating paste. She starts dating a guy from the group, but not just any guy, the main one, the glue that holds the rest of the group together—mainly because he's the main paste-eater but also because face it, no girls are dropping their panties for the guy in your group who can most closely identify with Ringo. Slowly but surely she begins to harness his time, making it impossible for him to hang out with his buddies without her there. And she's got an old school Nintendo Game Genie hanging out in her back pocket that makes her invincible—so everybody suffers but her. Eventually the rest of the guys have to move on without their leader. And while the group is still pretty decent in their own right, the paste just doesn't have that minty taste anymore and now smells like MSG.

The Dumb Box
When you talk to this one you always leave the conversation thinking, "How the hell did she get into this school?" or "Isn't there a screening process to weed the stupid ones out so they won't continue to breed?" She doesn't understand common knowledge, she asks the stupid questions in class, and she thinks that her friend Yoko's friend Ringo has a child's song named after him. But she does know every line from Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion, and she's usually really petite and cute-looking, and all around pretty harmless. So socially it's good to have her around if for nothing else but to make you look smart in front of, well everyone else.

The "One of the Guys Girl"
She's literally one of the guys. Wherever guys go she's there. She's like the anti-Christ for other girls who want to hang out with the guys, but can't because they're feeling judged by this one who is best friends with the entire group. (Except Yoko because she's got that permanent fireball power. Thank you Game Genie.) And while One of the Guy's Girl is never dating anyone in the group because, and she says with smug pride, because I'm like their little sister and they're all my big protectors. Yeah so she never really gets laid either. Or at least that's what the rest of us who are sitting in our big groups at parties watching her infiltrate the still very common grade school gender line—men one side of the room, women on the other—would like to believe. In short, guys love her because she pretends not to be an emotional needy girl, and girls hate her because she can't really dress herself stylishly for a party (are those white shoes with a black dress?) and no one seems to care.

The Make-Out Bandit
She keeps a list of all the guys she's made out with in her life, but stopped around 187 when she realized she had a long night and didn't catch some of the guy's last name, and wasn't sure if the last person she was making out with was a girl or a guy. Whatever the case, maybe she's the Ron Jeremy of tongue action. Every time you see her she's always sucking face with someone. She's claimed to have mono at least three times now, a habit that also serves as her diet secret and that's how she stays so thin. Her only true attribute is the fact that she's had so much practice at kissing that she truly can be noted as the best kisser on campus. Today the campus, tomorrow the world: professional kisser - teaches you how to suck face good for ten bucks an hour. Just know that her tongue may have a whole new colony of species growing on it.

The Girl With Bad Roots
She was born with blonde hair. When it started to fade or grow darker in high school she got it highlighted. And since then has always got it highlighted. So through the years she's been many shades of blonde. But sometimes she waits eight weeks instead of four to get them roots from showing and now her hair looks like late eighties Madonna. Dark black then blonde. You can't say anything either because she's usually super nice and friendly—but I know some girls really just want to throw a bottle of peroxide at her while driving in a car so she won't be able to identify them later.

The Funny But Emotionally Wounded Drunk
Overall a funny drunk, but sometimes one too many rum and cokes make her unusually edgy. When this happens she proceeds to make fun of The Girl With Bad Roots who's now dating the drunk's ex-boyfriend. However, in her defense, her actions are only provoked when she sees people she feels emotionally betrayed by and let's them have it. "Remember in sixth grade when you weren't allowed to use paste anymore and I slipped you some during PE? Yeah well thanks a lot for not leaving me a Valentine's Day card that year." Or maybe a more recent reference, "I don't know why he's dating you. You have bad roots. If I had roots as bad as yours and was dating you I would dump you and then date myself. That's right I said date myself." Then she walks away and plugs the tapper to the keg in her mouth and slowly sips her way into Blackoutville. But it's so endearing when you see her next that you laugh—except the nice girl with bad roots, but come on, someone had to tell her.

LoveHandles
This girl wears shirts and shorts and skirts that are too tight for her tummy. Consequently her tummy, or for the unpolitically correct, "beer belly," or if you prefer "Freshman 15" maybe just plain old FAT, hangs off the sides of herself. Now you normally don't see this on the East and West Coast Schools because they have special doctors to take care of that, but in the Midwest and (thanks to Supersize Me) Texas they have girls who look like fried chicken is being mass produced. And I know that Abercrombie clothes suck when it comes to sizes, but no one wants to see a belly ring resting comfortably on a big wad of Popeye's chicken and biscuit gravy baby.

The Exchange Student
Doesn't like watching The Family Guy because she doesn't get the jokes. However she still enjoys watching Sex and the City even though she sometimes gets the slang confused. "Toxic Bachelor is just drunk man right?" Well, the definition is a little more complicated than that, but sure just go with it. Normally blonde and wears designer clothes. Only dates Abercrombie looking guys and never has to buy herself drinks in bars because of her cute accent. In other words, every American girl's nightmare. Also the ringer of her cell phone is one of Abba's greatest hits or 50 Cent's In Da Club. That's it, only those two.

The Bullhorn
You're on first floor and you can hear her voice from the fourth floor. She has no concept of a little thing I like to call volume control. You know all her business, and not by choice, but because all she does is blast it in her loud speaker of a voice. I live two doors down the hall from opera singers who like to practice at three in the afternoon when I'm trying to nap and I can still hear her this girl's voice from outside my window in the parking lot six floors down. This is where we need Funny But Emotionally Wounded Drunk girl to pick up a remote and point it at her to turn her voice level down.

The Watcher
She doesn't talk much. All she does in class is stare. Stares at the professor. Stares out the window. But it's really creepy when the professor is talking, the window is on your left-hand side and half her body is turned around on the chair and she's just staring at you. This happens because she was denied video games as a child and now has no eye coordination, which means she'll never be a Yoko, so I guess that's good news but it still freaks anyone out that's in her line of sight.

Put It On My Tab
Ah yes the generous drunk that busts out her credit card and wakes up with signed tabs that she's convinced is just the bar's phone number.

Butt I Like It Girl
Is open about the fact that she likes sex in an area normally reserved for sitting.

The Outdoor Whore
Is known for wanting to have sex in the most random places. A pitcher's mound, a grassy knoll down by the river, the laundry room. Anywhere public that she can be caught. A water tower, a cornfield, the airport runway, wherever there's a throw blanket in a public space she'll be there.

Clit Blocker
Girl who isn't hip to cues and thus is unable to leave a guy and girl alone in the room so they don't have to make it so obvious they're going to hook up. Eventually she just keeps talking so much that the guy can't stand it and leaves. Then the now sexually starved girl screams at her friend for not knowing how to shut up and just leave. Even the Dumb Box got the hint twenty minutes ago, what the fuck is wrong with you?

Crazy (Insert Name Here)
Crazy Melissa, Crazy Cassandra, Crazy Monica. Crazy Rachael. She's just the girl on campus who got dubbed the crazy one because she's, well, just plain old crazy. She dresses up like she works at a Renaissance festival everyday or wears the Mardi Gras beads to class that she got at the bar from the night before because "they're pretty." Also she's been seen sitting in only a blanket outside her room crying and completely inconsolable. Like I said Crazy.

The Co-Dependent
Or if prefer the politically correct term, Serial Monogamist. She's the girl who's never without a boyfriend, or practically lives with her boyfriend in his apartment or dorm room. You never see her without him. And if she's ever been single it's only been for five minutes while she was scoping out her next serious long term relationship.

The Emotionally Damaged
Oh wait that's all of them.

Kiwi Karaoke

2005-03-31T09:40:00.000-05:00

It was a few weeks ago that I found out about JJ's return to home party, and from the first hints Benny gave me, I knew it was going to be a wild-ass time. However, I had no expectations of it being as wild as it actually was....The story of the night follows, but be warned it will contain what I can remember, and pieces of info that has been given to me by those a bit more..umm sober....Enjoy.

For those who do not know the situation, I will lay it out for you. Johnson had been playing softball over in New Zealand for the past 5 months, so Ben and Joe thought a welcome party would be a great idea. Ben, being Ben found a place that only does karaoke. The lady who owns the place also owns a spa in the mall here... After a few "visits" Ben had secured the Karaoke bar for a private party, AKA Kiwi Karaoke! Invitations were printed, plans were set, and things were ready to roll....

Fri March 25....
Things got underway at around 4:45 on Friday. Josh, Meridith, Joey and I met up at On the Border for happy hour.... This was good times, we sat from approx 5 until 7:30 drinking mostly maragaritas...plus a few captains via Joey. Yeah, so this was needless to say a little forshadowing of what was to come...JJ and I had about 7 margaritas..each. After some good conversation, stories..we broke out back to my house. Short stop at the liquor store to pick up 2 handles of captain*The karaoke bar did not have a liqour liscense, so they said we could bring in 2 handles and they would pour it, but only for our small crew*.....Off to Sam's house. Lucky, or unluckily..depending on how you look at it, JJ had a bout 3/4 of a handle left over from Savannah at my place...So we took that down like champs before heading over to Karaoke. Needless to say we were in a good place when we rolled in.

The party was slated to start at 10pm, so after a quick lime run for those drinking coronas, I warm up my vocal chords with my first song of the night "let it be" by the beatles...and wow i sing a lot better sober..but the Triads who ran the place thought I sounded good. Soon after, Jaguar and I did an awesome rendition of "sittin on the dock of the bay" by otis redding...awesome song!! Then things started to escalate....QUICKLY. The place was dead, and then like some time lapsed movie, the place was rammed! On to my next song "total eclipse of the heart" in which i made love to my bottle of corona, and to JJ i think, he was helping out with the back-up vocals.....this would be an ongoing theme for the night. I think the best thing about this night was the fact that everyone and their mom came out, we have been looking for this kind of night all semester, and it only took..hmm 12 or 13 weeks i guess, weak ass i know, but later is better than never.

A lot of folks got up and sang, which was awesome..my night continued with a bunch of songs summer lovin, rocky top,basket case,play me some some country music.. I had to be reminded about most of these songs.... Now for the funny highlights..

While singing "Your Song" Meridith undid JJ's pants and pulled his jeans down, JJ did not skip a beat...moments later Ben removed JJ's boxers..JJ did not skip a beat...shortly after Ben begins playing with JJ's balls.. JJ did not skip a beat. A lot of folks were shocked by this..all that goes to show is that those people do not hang out with us as much as they should, that kinda stuff happens more often than you would think.

I had my moment of humility, but I was to drunk to care.. So Brett was there..awesome! So I walk up to the bar and see brett from behind, so I walk up grab his hips and start dancing with him...he turns around, and it is not Brett, it is his stand in double, I hae no clue who this guy was to this day..but it is a funny story.

Umm and the winner of the night was Mosi, that boy can fuckin sing!

So yeah do not ask me for many other details, I am still piecing things together...It was a blast! Credit goes to Benny and Joey for setting this one up.......and I hear rumors of it happening again....so we'll see.

Another one, but it is awesome!

2005-03-29T15:22:00.000-05:00

1. Favorite Beatles song: For no one

2. Favorite Rolling Stones song: Paint it black

3. Favorite Doors song: Riders on the Storm

4. Favorite Bob Dylan song: Rolling Stone

5. Favorite Pixies song: Alec eiffel

6. TV Theme Song: The Last American Superhero

7. Favorite Prince Song: Little Red Corvette

8. Favorite Madonna Song: Like a Prayer

9. Favorite Michael Jackson Song: Billy Jean

10. Favorite Metallica Song: Enter Sandman

11. Favorite Motorhead Song: The ace of spades

12. Favorite Ozzy Song: Crazy Train

13. Favorite Debbie Gibson Song: Electric Youth

14. Favorite Song from a cartoon: The Thundercats

15. Favorite Faith No More song: Epic

16. Favorite Depeche Mode song: Shout

17. Favorite Cure song: Friday I'm in love

18. Favorite song that most of your friends haven't heard: Goodbye Forever-Alkaline Trio

19. Favorite New Order song: Bizarre Love Triangle

20. Favorite Beastie Boys song: Sabotage

21. Favorite Aerosmith song: Dream On

22. Favorite Police song: Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic

23. Favorite Sex Pistols song: God Save the Queen

24. Favorite Beach Boys song: God Only Knows

25. Favorite Def Leppard song: Rock of Ages

26. Favorite song from your favorite movie: Love Theme-Cinema Paradiso

27. Favorite Duran Duran song: Hungry Like the Wolf

28. Favorite Blondie song: Maria

29. Favorite Kid Rock song: Gross

30. Favorite song from an 80's one hit wonder: Take on me-A HA

31. Favorite song from a videogame: Zelda

32. Favorite Zombies song: who?

33. Raspberries song: who?

34. Favorite Led Zepplin song: Dyer Maker

35. Favorite INXS song: Devil Inside

36. Favorite Weird Al song: Stuck in a closet with vanna white

37. Favorite Billy Idol song: Dancing with Myself

38. Favorite Pretenders song: I'll Stand by You

39. Favorite Pink Floyd song: Another Brick in the Wall

40. Favorite cover song: Anyway You Want It-Rise Against

41. Favorite Poison song: At the Drive In

42. Favorite dance song: The Sporting Life- The Descemberists

43. Favorite U2 song: Sunday Bloody Sunday

44. Favorite song from an actor turned musician: I Believe(Theme From Baywatch)-David Hasselhoff

45. Favorite disco song: Everybody was Kung Fu Fighting

46. Favorite Motley Crue song: Dr. Feelgood

47. Favorite Guns N' Roses song: Welcome to the jungle

48. Favorite Dr. Dre song: Nothin but a G thing

49. Favorite Elton John song: Tiny Dancer..only when JJ sings it

50. Favorite song, period: Silly Girl

bored at work

2005-03-28T10:40:00.000-05:00

Ok so I am in a reto kinda mood, so i'm gonna take you all back to your high school days and do one of these geeky surveys.....Karaoke blog coming soon.

DO YOU SNORE? been known to

ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER? lover...yeah lover for sure

WHAT'S YOUR WORST FEAR? drowning in 2 inches of water

AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC? fuck naw, capsules, bitch

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF "REALITY" TV? yeah, thats a boo

WERE YOU A CUTE BABY? we all look like aliens don't we

IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU? for the time being it is

HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED? Nope

SKY DIVED? nope

ANY SPECIAL TALENTS? none i can think of

IS JAY LENO FUNNY? he's ok

IS CONAN? funnier than leno

CAN YOU SWIM? nope

HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVE "DONNIE DARKO"? own the special edition

ARE YOU A VIRGIN? nope

DO YOU GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE OZONE? not really

HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOSTIE POP? i suck and bite

HAVE YOU EVER HAD SEX IN AN AIRPLANE? not yet

ARE YOU AN ONLY CHILD? naw, 2 other evil spawns roam around as well

DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENERS? manual

WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING? makes me sad

IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE? most likely, but being single hampers this

DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? since college i've had none.

WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO? pine trees

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID LOVE YOU? months

DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS? never been to one

HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS? scrambled

WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP? ask blackass

EVER DATED SOMEONE WITH A FOOT FETISH? nope

WHAT TIME IS IT? 10:47am

DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME? damnbitch,puffy,holden,gross

IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING? of course not

DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS? Showers

IS SANTA CLAUSE REAL? fuck naw

DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED? who does'nt

ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK? nope

WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO? M*A*S*H

CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER? Creamy

WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES? brown

HOW LOUD DO YOU SNEEZE? what?

DO YOU WEAR UNDERWEAR? most of the time

DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE? s'ok

WHAT'S YOUR BEST FRIEND'S NAME? Angie,Josh,Benny,Joey,Steve-o,

WHO'S BETTER: STONE COLD OR THE ROCK? Jimmy "the superfly" snuka

ARE YOU PSYCHIC? with some people

HAVE YOU READ "CATCHER IN THE RYE"? nicknames holden.....

DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS? trumpet,guitar

CAN YOU SKATE? iceskate, yes!

DO YOU LIKE CAMPING? yeah

DO YOU SNORT WHEN YOU LAUGH? sometimes

ARE DOGS A MAN'S BEST FRIEND? AT TIMES

WOULD YOU CHEAT IF IT WAS GUARANTEED THAT YOUR "SIGNIFICANT OTHER" WOULD NEVER FIND OUT? Naaw

DO YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE? sure

CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK? i'm white

DO YOU MAKE A LOT OF MISTAKES? every day

DOES SIZE MATTER? I really hope not......

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? carnation instant breakfast

DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH? at times

DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE? never have, never will

Somethings on my mind..........

2005-03-16T09:14:00.000-05:00

So I am back in the lab, on a disgusting rainy day, feeling like my lack of sleep has caught up with me. Today I may post twice...we'll see. But for now I will give you the update on what has been going on.

Vegas:
Besides a lot of time gambling, mostly blackjack, Vegas was not that crazy. That being said, it was a great trip that was definately needed at this point of the year. The other 3 boys played a lot of poker, so I found myself with free time to wander about the crazy city known as Las Vegas. Some of those hotels/casinos are unreal. Ceasars palace knocked me out the most, it had ceilings painted like the sky with replica cities below, actually felt like you were outside...insanity. Other realizations, waitresses are not afraid to bring you double captains all night long.....Cooper at Fatburger was my homeboy.....Hooker or Not is a great game......Steve really should have gotten the shot and dance at Club Paradise....George the dealer may have been the devil himself.....Taxi drivers will not refuse change when it comes time to pay.....and most important Snapping escort cards will magically make you want to grab one, something about the sound. But Vegas did what it does, takes money while providing a great time.

Angie:
Just got off the phone with angie, we talked for almost an hour. She is doing as well as could be expected. The getting yelled at and all the pettyness that goes on caught up with her though, and she was pretty upset for the first 10 minutes or so. She's tough though, and will make it through. I told her to remember that it is all a game they play. I really miss her though. I'm flying down to her graduation april 1st, so that should be a good time. Anyone ever been to San Antonio before??

Stef:
Stef is still in town, she ships off in 2 days, and I will miss her as well. It is always good to have her around, she always provides good conversation. I am glad she got to meet all my friends this trip, however,she has chosen Joey as her favorite....ok so maybe she is a little retarded, maybe even adopted. But she has kept me busy, every day has involved late nights, and alcohol of some sort...imagine that. I need to return to morgantown ometime in the near future to return the favor.

Other Shit:
Josh is getting back soon, oh boyeee. Got the new alkaline trio cd "crimson" from the source, the release date is not for several more months...good work son.

Ok so i need to think of a tandem blog...Josh's commentor suggested differences between the male and female orgasm.....that may have some potential....i'll have to ponder upon that.

Cheers

Lyrics The Descendents.."When I get old"

What Will It Be Like When I Get Old
Will I Still Hop On My Bike, And Ride Around Town
Will I Still Want To Be Someone, And Not Just Sit Around
I Don'T Want To Be Like Other Adults
Cause They'Ve Already Died
Cool And Condescending, Fossilized
Will I Be Rich Will I Be Poor, Will I Still Sleep On The Floor
What Will It Be Like When I
GetWhat Will I Be Like When I Get
What Will It Be Like When I Get Old

Will I Still Kiss My Girlfriend And Try To Grab Her Ass
Will I Still Hate The Cops And Have No Class
Will All My Grown Up Friends Say They'Ve Seen It All Before
They Say Hey Act Your Age And I'M Immature
Will I Do Myself Proud Or Only What's Allowed
What Will It Be Like When I Get
What Will I Be Like When I Get
What Will It Be Like When I Get Old

Will I Sit Around And Talk About The Old Days
Sit Around And Watch T.V. I Never Want To Go That Way
Never Burn Out Not Fade Away
As I Travel Through My Time Will I Like What I Find
What Will It Be Like When I Get
What Will I Be Like When I Get
What Will It Be Like When I Get Old

Can a person really waste 25 hours a week....While working

2005-02-22T14:31:00.000-05:00

*to respond to my fucking annoying anonymous commentor: no while at work i have no contact with real people, so thus i make that time up in th evenings/night...aka where the inspiration for most of these blogs come from. so please..don't ever feel sorry for me*

Ya know, people are always asking what I did today, and I usually give them some contrived answer about how I saved the world one little bit at a time, but today, just this once I will go through a typical day for me at work....

For those of you who do not know, I am currently employed at the Tully Gym computer lab. I am contracted to work 25 hours per week, and usually take the early shifts. Like today for example, I am working 7:45-4:15. Now I will list my responsibilities in the lab. I 1) open the lab in the morning 2) turn on all the computers when I get here 3)make sure kids sign in when they come in and 4) load paper into the printer at 8am 1pm and 5pm. Thats it, besides answering some retarded questions the students here come up with. So yeah...as you can see my job is uber tough, and although i do not really do anything, it gets really boring. So I have to find ways to occupy my time.

The best times in the lab come during unintentional comedy moments, these do not happy often, but when they do it is great. I have one story that will exemplify what I am talking about. It was the end of last semester and involved a gigantic football player and two professors here at FSU. So to explain, the lab is open to students all the time except for when a teacher reserves it so they can teach a class using computers. To reserve a class they have to call us blah blah blah and we take care of it. So this professor signed up and gave instructions that others could use the lab while her class was in here, so I'm like cool no worries for me. So when the time comes she comes in and tells me she needs the whole lab for testing, and she is a total and complete bitch, so of course I had no sympathy. So everyone leaves except for this one football player, who through his non verbal communication expressed he was not leaving. I of course was working on a bibliography for a project due in 30 minutes, so I did not care what was going on either way. So basically the teacher and the kid got into a verbal battle, him calling her a fucking bitch etc.... and the teacher physically grabbing him and trying to pull him out of his seat!!! She asked me for help, so I stood up and said "hey you need to leave" the guy said "no" so I sat back down and continued with my Bibliography. Eventually the professor went and got a male professor, and he talked the guy into leaving, but not before more cussing occured, I was laughing my ass off.............on the inside of course. Now I wish this happened everyday, because it was so goddamned hilarious, but unfortunately it does'nt...therefore I have to find other ways to occupy my time.

Instant Messenger/MSN Messenger
So basically this is how the whole instant messaging thing goes....if you are online, I am probably going to start talking to you. Now I know IM etiquette and how you are only supposed to send someone a message when you have stuff to talk about, but I'm bored and talk to everyone anyways. I also have a sort of ritual with the wonderfall(http://www.boompowsurpriseoh.blogspot.com) where as we both work at 8 am everyday, so throughout the day we hit each other up with inspirational chats, the first usually occuring between 8am and 8:03am. Fuck foldgers, I have the wonderfall! So yeah, IM kills a few hours if i'm lucky during the day.

Browsing web pages
Yeah browsing the web can kill most of your day, I mean at times it gets kinda boring especially if you do the unthinkable and browse to fast. I have a list of usual suspects, that I will list in a second. If you go through them slowly, waaaa laaaa 5 hours of your day is gone. Some of my favorites are(in no order)
WWW.FARK.COM
WWW.THEFACEBOOK.COM
WWW.COLLEGEHUMOR.COM
WWW.MYSPACE.COM
WWW.CNN.COM
WWW.CRAIGSLIST.ORG
WWW.BORED.COM (crosswords)
I know that does not look like enough to kill the day, but trust me my friend...it is. Take for example fark, it updates every couple of minutes so the news listings are always changing, and then you can review all the comments left by farkers, it is a werd little club that often turns out to be hilarious. You should check them out today!

Movies
On occasion I will bring a movie to work and watch it, especially on 8+ hour days cause i mean who does not need a movie break now and again.

Well I guess that takes care of a typical day minus school work that needs to be done, blogging, responding to e mails, and other tasks that I perform on a regular basis. I know now how much more exciting I must seem to all of you reading this, and I ready to take on that responsibility. Ok I'm off in 30, gotta brush up on the world events aka Farking.

Lyrics of the day: Hell Yes- Alkaline Trio

I gave up on you a long time ago
How can you blame me?
We made plans to meet and you never showed
You kept me waiting
They said everything would work out just fine
They said you'd help me
But as it turns out it was all a lie
And they're off someplace far away laughing at me

You've been there for me one time in my life
But it didn't matter
You came and went so fast all my hope
And faith in you shattered
And now here I sit alone in this room
No one to confide in
You watched all my dreams come apart at the seams
You laughed, you left, you waited in hiding

Bless me dark father I have sinned
I've done it before and I'll do it again
Cuz it keeps me warm, and makes you smile
Been beneath me all the while
Hell yes

You gave up on me along time ago
I can't say I blame you
I rejected the faith in your holy rays
Is what it comes down to
They said everything would work out just fine
I just went crazy
But I'm better now having a good time
Being selfish, and drunken, and vulgar, and lazy

I'm Still Alive....I Suppose

2005-02-22T13:00:00.000-05:00

*Disclaimer* If you leave a comment on my page, would you please include your name....I'm tired of the anonymous nonsense.

Hello to all my friends who read this, I have been away for awhile I know, but if you are reading this, you can obviously live without me.....so go fire your therapist.

I guess I will give you all the update in this post......next post will be back to the comedy show.

Ok so awhile back I posted that I was not happy with what I was doing....that has not changed. After a couple conversations with some folks, I have decided that I need to do something different. What does that entail?? I have no fucking clue, but I need something different. What I have decided is that my time in Tally is coming close to an end. Close being as soon as April or as late as August. As with everything I have always done, my parents are supporting all of this, so that is a big help. As many of you know my folks built a new house not too long ago, so they have basically said that I could move into our old place and have it to myself, so that option has opened up. This is what I will most likely choose to do, I have already e mailed my old bosses up in NOVA to see if I could get some work until I find a job up there. But like I said I do not know what I want to do, I just know i need a change. So this means I will from this point on not accept any new friends from the Tallahassee area. it is gonna be hard enough to leave the ones I already have.

As a side note, does anyone have any idea what the maximum amount of student loans one can take out. I mean hypothetically if you stay in school all your life, will the government only give out so much money?? I went to a website yesterday that showed how much I owe already, and it was ladies and gentlemen...staggering. I was wondering if I was reaching my limit or not, if there is a "limit"

Not to sound all gushy and shit, cause everyone knows I'm a hard-ass grrrrr. But I'd like to say thanks to those folks who have listened to me over the past few weeks, your input means a lot to me. You all know who you are, but in case you don't I'll throw out a special thanks in code. The usual suspects are.....The Supernova,wonderfall,"Tsunami,"stretch", The Power, special K, Alli g, I like your Ipod, Bulliemonster, and Stef.

For those who knew angie, I talked with her last night. She survived her first week, 6 more to go before she is chillin in Monterey. I'm proud of the girl.

On a happier note leaving for las vegas next weekend for a short lil stint of good times.....and then it is a short recovery period before the arrival of Stef, who could save my life, or at least make me feel a whole lot better about everything that is going on.

Ok that is all for the moment, like I said this was just an updater..........next post back to normal.

Song of the day The Sporting Life-The Decemberists

I fell on the playing field
the work of an errant heel
the din of the crowd and the loud commotion
when deafening silence had stopped emotion
the season was almost done we managed it 12 to 1
so far I had known no humiliation
in front of my friends and close relations

There's my father looking on
and there's my girlfriend arm in arm
with the captain of the other team
and all of this is clear to me they condescend and fix on me a frown
how they love the sporting life

And father had had such hopes
for a son who would take the ropes
and fulfill all his old athletic aspirations
but apparently now there's some complications
but while I am lying here
trying to fight the tears
I'll prove to the crowd that I come out stronger
though I think I might lie here a little longer

Oh that amazing technology...opiate of the mass nerders

2005-02-02T15:27:00.000-05:00

Back in my secret lab, if you know where it is, come visit. Had a great night at poor paul's last night, it was Special K's defense party! After a bunch of tequila, we ended at the usual hot spot, and fun was had by all. I probably drank to much for a Wednesday night, being I had to get up and work, but it was worth it. I mean seriously, can someone drink to much??

Yeah so anyways, today I want to put my two cents in about instant messaging, text messaging, and e mail. I have a few opinions and theories on all of them. I guess the whole idea for this entry stemmed from an article that I read yesterday that said that more people lie to your face then they do via e mail. Now at first that shit sounded crazy to me, I mean why would so many people tell the truth via e mail? After thinking about it, I came to the realization that the new communication technology is like a super drug, or highly potent alcohol. An explanation follows.

E-Mail:
So I mean really, why should you ever lie when writing an e mail, now I know there are exceptions but you know what I am saying. You are sitting at a computer, the recipient is not around, they could be next door, or a million miles away...it makes no difference. I say this technological communication is like drugs because all inhibitions are lost when you are sending an E-mail. We have all done it, so don't get preachy on me. So there is a guy/girl you like and yo write up a flirty e mail, i mean you miss 100% of the shots you never take.....so it's always worth a shot. So you get this thing all typed up, you proof-read it to make sure it does not read like a stalker note, you may walk around the room a few times before sending it, all you have to do is click the send button, it is that easy, but sometimes you have to talk yourself up for such a task. You get that pit in your stomach, the butterflies are going nuts. Then you send it.....instantly relaxed. You know there are only a few applicable responses, 1) she calls the cops 2) she thinks its cute 3) she acts like it never happened. Now this the greatest part!!!! You can have a year long conversation with a person via e mail and never have to talk about it in person, it is as if the thoughts do not exist outside of your computer. Totally different from really talking with someone, because once you talk face to face you know that it really happened.

Instant Messaging:
Instant messaging is the greatest and worst thing ever invented. It is great because I waste hours a day talking to people who live a billion miles away, and we can have somewhat realistic conversations. It is also great because it is free, so you can basically replace phone calls a lot of the time with a little instant messaging. Now at the same time, this invention has the devil eyes. It is basically just like E -mail at a much quicker pace. However, the most dangerous thing about IM is there is a lack of emotion involved, so humor is sometimes misunderstood as being mean etc..... This can be "Dangerous"! But IM's are very effective in starting a conversation, because for the most part, people will respond ton an IM, even if it is out of curiosity at first. And IM's are definitely the best for saying stuff you would never dream about saying in person. Basically it is the same as Email, you say stuff and then its the wait game to see how that person responds then it is like reading a pick your own adventure book, if the person responds positively, you go with that, if they react negatively, you play damage control and then continue on. The best part for me is the hint dropping that is involved, you'll be having a good conversation, and then just drop some miniscule hint, and bam! the whole thing changes.

Text Messages:
The newest of communication marvels, and also the most satanic. These shits are highly addictive and super dangerous if used incorrectly. "Sex-Texting" is what I call it. This is when you are up way to late after drinking way to much, and start texting everyone in your phone about how you'd like to make out with them. Now I could be embarrassed to admit that I have done this...but everyone has. Do not try to deny it...I know you have, and if you say you hav'nt....then all I have to say to that is "I wish you were'nt a fuckin' liar". So text messaging is dangerous because the messages are super short and can be interpreted in more ways than the fucking bible. Ridunkulous! for example here are some classics that i have sent, in no specidic order. "ur hot" "i'm drunk, but i love you" "we should have made out when i was home" "2 handles in 2 days" "i feel like making out". Yeah, and the funny thing is for the most part they are not taken seriously, but every once and awhile things can get crazy, and that can be bad or good i suppose.

Disclaimer: None of the formentioned technologies should be used when intoxicated, unless you are interested in hilarity to set in, or you are doing an experiment to better understand human nature.

I suppose that is all I have to say, and now after writing that, I can understand why honesty is found more in E-Mail.....there is no reason to lie.

Lyrics Bad Religion 21st Century (Digital Boy)

can't believe it, the way you look sometimes
Like a trampled flag on a city street, oh yeah
And I don't want it, the things you're offering meSymbolized bar code, quick ID, oh yeah

Cuz I'm a 21st century digital boy
I don't know how to live but I've got a lot of toys my
daddy's a lazy middle class intellectual
my mommy's on valium, so ineffectual
Ain't life a mystery?

I can't explain it, the things you're saying to me
It's going yayayayayayaya, oh yeah

Cuz I'm a 21st century digital boyI don't know how to read but I've got a lot of toys
My daddy's a lazy middle class intellectual
My mommy's on valium, so ineffectual
Ain't life a mystery?

Tried to tell you about no control
But now I really don't knowAnd then you told me how bad you had to suffer
Is that really all you have to offer?

Cuz I'm a 21st century digital boy
I don't know how to live but I've got a lot of toys
My daddy's a lazy middle class intellectual
My mommy's on valium, so ineffectual
Ain't life a mystery?

An Ode To Our Favorite Place...

2005-01-30T23:59:00.000-05:00

Joey is guest starring in todays entry, with a little tribute to a place we like to call our second home. Enjoy! News Flash: Joey has a hot new blog www.boompowsurpriseoh.blogspot.com what? Boom Pow Surprise. OHHHH!

I know this bar…

I know this bar that plays Snoop Doggy Dogg and They Might Be Giants on the same Jukebox.
I know this bar with a backroom with more stories than alcohol.
I know this bar where after hours means drinking is allowed only when naked.
I know this bar with Dr.’s for bartenders.
I know this bar where I can a shout out to my people: Liz, Wendy, James, Dickson, Pony, Tommy, Jazz, Caryn, Jimmy, & Greg.
I know this bar where frat boys and sorority sisters co-exist with the edgies and lesbians.
I know this bar that trains Bar Olympics champions.
I know this bar where the regulars are lovely.
I know this bar with more than its equal share of crazies.
I know this bar under the porn store.
I know this bar where booths are more highly regarded than fake breasts.
I know this bar with real darts; however, poking people in the eye with said darts is discouraged.
I know this bar whose owner is crazy.
I know this bar where marriages are created and fostered.
I know this bar where relationships fall apart.
I know this bar that welcomes bed-wetters.
I know this bar has a Captain waiting upon arrival.
I know this bar with free pizza.
I know this bar where I have a passed out in every booth.
I know this bar IS CASH ONLY!
I know this bar with the best 4 pool tables in town.
I know this bar where the folks in the corner booth are in charge for the evening.
I know this bar where I will be made fun of for saying “shout out” earlier.
I know this bar knows the way I roll.
I know this bar where the X was born.
I know this bar with a wall of shame.
I know this bar where people are upset that they are not on the wall of shame.
I know this bar has got my back.
I know this bar has threatened to beat me up.
I know this bar with Left-Handed Darts & Tray of Shots.
I know this bar where a slow night means no one passed out in the bathroom.
I know this bar where I was the dead guy.
I know this bar with full-time tandem dancers.
I know this bar where a nickel is not a tip.
I know this bar that may cause lung cancer.
I know this bar where I lost my car.
I know this bar that helped me find it.
I know this bar where the real you comes out.

I know this bar you gotta see.
I know this bar Poor Paul’s.

Err I Think I Can Float.....Maybe?

2005-01-27T10:47:00.000-05:00

So I have just returned from another Orlando adventure, and once again I am still living. I will write up that Blog in a little bit. Before that story, I'd like to write a few comments on the thing we call water, and why I love and hate that shit.

So where I grew up in Virginia, I was a bit isolated from other kids besides my two sisters. There is a 1 acre pond on our family property, but we were never allowed in it because of the obvious things, possible broken bottles, heroin needles, abandoned hit-man cars, snakehead fish, leeches, octopi, toxic waste filtering in from DC, you name it. So water activities around ours was a bit limited. I suppose there were swimming pools around, but it was not like my parents had enough time to take us. They were already doing the dad works days, mom works nights so someone could always be home with us. Then there was my constant fight with ear infections, I got those bitches like 8 times a year at least. So i guess when I was 5ish they went in and put tubes in my ears. I do not quite understand how the operation helps, but i know that the tubes keep your eardrums open constantly, so putting your head under water is not an option. Then there was the whole thing i had about being self-conscience about taking my clothes off in public. This does not seem to be a problem anymore.........but back in the day I was a lot more shy, imagine that.

All of these factors culminated into me not being in much water when i was growing up. And by some powerful inductive reasoning, you all have probably figured out that I cannot swim. Now before I go any farther, keep in mind that I like water. I like going on boats, I like going to the ocean, I like tubing, I like hot tubs, so as you can see there is trend forming: not having to swim. So I am not scared of water per se, I am scared that my ass will drown or get stranded in some water. This post may seem odd or out of place but there have been a couple situations recently that are pertinent to this blog.

The first was in Morgantown, WV this summer while visiting my little sister. We are chillin at her house the day after i had a crazy blackout experience with the Captain....but that is another story. So anyways we are sitting on her porch and a guy she knows rolls up and hangs out for awhile...then suggests we go out on cheat lake on his boat. I'm thinking..yeah sure I'll go on that bitch, i mean it's a boat right...not like I have to swim. So we get there, and I should have known things were going to get crazy when the boat would not start. The battery was dead. So my sister and her friend jump in the water grab a rope and swim the boat along shore from where it was moored. Of course I just sat on the boat and added some weight for them to pull, I'm just that nice. So it finally gets started and we are out on the water, and I am having a great time. Things are going fine until someone suggests going tubing. Now tubing for anyone not watersport savvy is where a big ass inner-tube is tied to the back of a boat and you ride that bitch while the guy driving the boat is actively trying to drive as crazy as they can hoping to fling you off and skip you like a rock for ohhh 350 yards. So everyone goes, then its my turn. And well anyone who knows me knows how hard it is to get me to do things. So yeah they break me in approx 30 seconds of persuasion. So I get my life jacket on, and proceed to get into the tube. Now most folks get in the water, then climb in the tube. Not I, I have to pull the tube along side the back and spend 2 minutes positioning it below my ass so as not to actually fall in the water. I guess this process most replicates an 89 year old man trying to sit on one of those toilet donuts, yay for mental pictures. So I get out there and am having a great time, all the time performing the GI Joe kung-fu grip on the tubes handles, my ass was going nowhere without amputation of the arms. I was a bit scared at times, cause the guy on the tube next to mine got flung off several times, and looking over to see an empty tube flailing in the wind is a scary sight! So i survive, no falling off, had a great time, then comes time to get back on the boat. Everyone else jumped off the tube and swam to the boat, nu uhh not me. I graped the rope ond towed my tube to the back. I realized that it was impossible to get from the tube to the boat without getting in....so I did what I had to do. I grabbed the edge of the boat and slowly lowered myself in. At this point, my feet are flailing around under the water looking for something to push off of, i find the propeller, then work my way up to the engine or something. From here i can muster enough strength to put some moves on the boat and give the back the good ol' leg over. I finally get my entire body up, and kinda just lay in an upside down spread eagle for awhile. Thus ending my outing out on the tubing adventure.

Transition: WVU-FSU a few weekends past, after having sucessfully avoiding water situations for a good many months.

So Joey,Ben,Steve,and I end up in Orlando our first weekend back in Tallahassee. I book hotels based on 2 criteria that are set in stone...1) they are uber cheap and 2) they have a hot tub. So unbeknownst to me while booking this trip, our little clarion hotel is located directly across from the Wet n' Wild water park. Ohhh boyyy! So yeah once this realization was made, it was an immediate decision by the other three that we would be frequenting said park before we broke out of O-Town. Like I said, the other three were excited, I got all anxious as soon as I realized they were serious. Now I could have said something, but it is just wrong to be the party wrecker and be like.."well you guys go ahead, I'm going to stay at the hotel and read some Brave New World". That would just be un-acceptable. Plus I mean it is a theme park, they have lifeguards and shit, so how scary can it be??? Turned out to be a bit scary. So Saturday we start our day off at the Cricketers and then it was decided that we needed to hit up Wet N' Wild, STAT. Ok, so we get there and we are how do they say it...tipsy. Some reason we get a locker, and all that but we did not feel like leaving our shirts there, sounds innocent now...leads to scariness later. So we are going on some rides, and I'm like yeah this shit is alright, we have tubes, no possibility of drowning while on a raft. After a few of these we roll upon these two British Chavs in training. These little fuckers in their bustered accent start raving about this ride called The Storm and how great it was...blah blah blah. Of course you cannot trust a Chav, so we had to try it for ourselves. This ride had Satan eyes, as Joey would say. I walked up on it and it looked kinda like a gigantic moon-shine still with this fake smoke rising from all over the place. And I understood the principle right away, you get sent out through a tube of fear where you are going all fast in all sorts of directions, and then you are spat out into a genormous funnel, kinda like those things you put coins in at the mall and you can race each other to see who's coin falls first, then the funnel shits you out into the black lagoon below. Like I said, i understood the principles, but did not quite understand the details involved. So I get to the top and the guy is like you have to take your shirt and glasses off....fuckin weak man. So keep in mind my hand are occupied... I get in the tube and wait for the green light and I'm off! I'm zoomin' through this tube at mach 12, coming a breath away from doing 360's in this bitch....then I am dropped in the funnel where i proceed to go aroing in circles for approximately 45 minutes, and the captain in my stomach was none to happy about this. Then the scary part starts, the part I was dreading..getting dropped in the lagoon. So I'm thinking the lagoon is going to be like 4 feet, and i'll go under be able to touch with my feel and stand up. Oh Noo, not knowing the details, the lagoon was like 8 feet deep! So I fall in and find myself under water, with a shirt in one hand, my glasses in another, looking for something for my feet to grab onto......panic sets in. So here I am under the water flailing with all four limbs expecting to die. After what seemed like minutes i get my head up above the water, but not before swallowing my body weight in chlorine. Once I realize where I am, I grab the side of the pool and inch my way over to where the stairs are....I survived a bit shook up, but alive. Now that was some scary shit. And then I topped the day off with Der Stuka.....I'll go ahead and say it... I had 3 seconds to panic.

So there is a few stories to support my love hate relationship with the worlds universal solvent. I have another embarrasing water slide story from my youth, but that can wait for another time I suppose.

Song O' the Day: Blue Oyster Cult- Don't Fear the Reaper AKA More Cowbell

All our times have come
Here but now they're gone
Seasons don't fear the reaper
Nor do the wind the sun or the rain (we can be like they are)
Come on baby (don't fear the reaper)
Baby take my hand (don't fear the reaper)
We'll be able to fly (don't fear the reaper)
Baby I'm your man
La-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la-la

Valentine is done
Here but now they're gone
Romeo and Juliet Are together in eternity (Romeo and Juliet)
40,000 men and women everyday (like Romeo and Juliet)
40,000 men and women everyday (redefine happiness) Another 40,000 coming everyday (we can be like they are)
Come on baby (don't fear the reaper)
Baby take my hand (don't fear the reaper)
We'll be able to fly (don't fear the reaper)
Baby I'm your man La-la-la-la-la la-la-la-la-la

Love of two is one
Here but now they're gone
Came the last night of sadness
And it was clear she couldn't go on
Then the door was open and the wind appeared
The candles blew then disappeared
The curtains flew then he appeared (saying don't be afraid)
Come on baby (and she had no fear)
And she ran to him (then they started to fly)
They looked backward and said goodbye (she had become like they are)
She had taken his hand (she had become like they are)
Come on baby (don't fear the reaper)

Shock me, shock me, shock me with that deviant behavior.

2005-01-20T09:20:00.000-05:00

A free kiss is promised to whom ever correctly guesses the movie the subject line is taken from.

So as I've been doing some introspection as of lately, I have found myself becoming very numb to a lot of things. I know I am far from a world traveler, and I hope my life is full of interesting experiences, but I have not been shocked in a fuckin while. Once again, it is one of those things that I cannot trace back to one event, and with this one, I have no idea where it even started.

You may ask how I am aware of this? It is sorta difficult to explain really, but the thing I notice most is that I do not change my expression when something odd happens. Example: Say someone is talking and says some shit, I suppose some would consider shocking or peculiar, my expression will likely stay like it would if we were just talking about the weather report.

The weirdest thing I suppose is that I would considered myself as being a bit sheltered up until ohhh about high school. So when I got to high school, shit did shock me, then I came to a realization that the world is a wild-ass place!, and that there are some wild-ass people roaming around. But like I said high school changed everything. As with any high schooler, i fell into my little social circle. My circle was with what some would call the "edgy" crowd. Now to the "American" standard they may not have been desirable citizens, but they were all super intelligent, and basically that is all that matters to me. Most were in one band or another, some never graduated, and at least one has died since graduation, but these were the folks I called friends. The great thing about these kids is that we had an understanding that everything was open for discussion. And as we hung out more, there was nothing taboo as far as conversations went. Approaching a rant tangent:And this is where I think a lot of people are lacking, especially in america, where we are supposed to be free minded and such, but a movie displaying a homo-sexual relationship always stirs up controversy. Lame I say!. Tangent is over.

So yeah between talking with folks, seeing some wild stuff, and participating in what some would call shady behaviors, the shock value is lost on me. And now I'm here in Florida, things are still the same. Per usual I fell in with a crowd where talking about anything, for the most part, is unrestricted, we share our tales, and no judgements are cast. All I can say is thank goodness for these folks.

Now that I have come to this realization, I am trying to figure out if it is a bad thing or a good thing. Like so many other questions, the answer is probably in the grey. On one side, I can say that it makes me a better person because I can be open about anything, and hopefully people feel they can talk to me about anything. Then on the negative side, I feel a bit desensitized, i mean whats going on with me goes against the whole school that says you should react a certain way for protection.

I guess that is enough for now. So I suppose there is a bit of a challenge for all of you, to do something to shock me ;) I'm game.

Lyrics o' the day: Strung Out-"Her Name in Blood"

And blow a kiss
when you only think of me
hold my hand and fuck away this blankness of expression
and all sorrows in between her name in blood
and her eyes on me her deepest secret lies
in front of me a whisper now is all that remains of me
you're the center of my unholy shrine scar tissue in time you're all mineyour the last hint of self-control
my last chance just walked out the door
drown out your artery straight thru a love that would never be her name in blood
and her eyes on me her deepest secret lies in front of me a whisper now is all that remains of me this sacrament is our punishment
I am the worst part of you
you are the only thing left to burn

The Time That We Kill Keeps Us Alive.....

2005-01-19T08:10:00.000-05:00

Ahh back to posting about me, sorry for those who did not understand all the inside jokes in the past entries, but like I said, you could probably get them out of me if you really tried.

today's post is inspired by dreamers and procrastinators:

Soo it seems that the longer I am in school, the more I realize that I am not done learning. By learning, I mean something new, I am sure I could sit and read Psych literature the rest of my life, but it is just boring these days. I have been studying in the same field for 6.5 years, and though I would never consider myself an expert, but it seems like nothing is new anymore, it's all variations on the same old stuff. Everyone wonders why some of us did not attend a lot of presentations in Minneapolis, well every presentation I went to was shit, and nothing new was presented. And the longer I am here, the more I have decided to no pursue a PhD in the field, because once I get that all I can do is teach or do research. The even more depressing thought is that with my M.S. I may be able to wipe my ass with it, and well....that is about it. Sooo I need a new game plan!

I guess I should be scared about all this, but I'm really not. I mean, some would consider me intelligent. And it may sound above that I am lazy, that is not the case, I am a very hardworker when I want to get something done. I am just bored these days, and to the outside world it looks like procrastination. And some may ask me dumb questions like, how are you going to support yourself...blah blah. And well, if you know me, I am not to concerned about making a lot of money when I "grow-up", that too me is boring too. As long as I can make enough money to survive, doing something that is fun, meaningful, or educational, you will never hear a complaint out of my mouth.

A few plans I would not mind looking into:

Plan A: Operation Phoenix
- So I have a housefull of friends in Phoenix that I grew up with in Va. They have been trying to get me out there for years. What would I do in Phoenix besides get real hot? I really do not know, but those guys assure me that I could find a job easily, and the cost of living is ridiculously cheap. Living in Phoenix opens up another opportunity, if I so choose to go back to school, I could apply to ASU after a year and receive in state tuition, that would be nice.

Plan B: Operation Dungeness Crab
- Over winter break I ran into an old friend who is currently working at a restaurant in Blacksburg(fuck VT). I have had aspirations of moving up to Seattle for a long while, and when he informed me that he was planning on doing the same this August, it almost felt like fate. Who do I know in Seattle? No one at all. Is that a bad thing? Probably not. Tabula rasa, right? I heard the biking is real good there, so maybe I can try my hand as a messenger, or if that does not work out, I am sure I could find some type of job that would pay well enough for me to survive. I have heard great things about Seattle, from a bunch of folks, and they have all agreed that I would probably be real happy there. It may sound strange, but I have always wanted to try my hand at culinary school, so if I end up out there, I may look into it.

Plan C: Fill the Nest
- My third option is to go back to Va and find a job until I figure things out. I say this because I could walk into almost any establishment on any day and get a well paying job up there. But this option is a fall-back emergency plan.

So ok, after you have read this you may think that I am a bit crazy. But hey, I mean if you did not realize that I was crazy by now, you really have not been paying any kind of attention to me. And that is just a shame, I am if nothing else entertaining.

This whole scheme has it's drawbacks though. I mean what kind of girl would want to hangout with someone who is so off the wall? I would suppose an awesome one, but she may be hard to find. At the same time, if I found one who understood all of this, we'd probably run away together. I know everyone who reads this, and knows me (aka the FSU kids) will not be surprised, and I thank you for that.

So there is no moral I guess, just some realizations:
1) I am not happy what I am doing
2) I am happy where I am right now
3) I need to go out and live life before deciding on what my calling is
4) I need to find an open-minded girl
5) I need to start working more seriously on some type of plan
6) I am a dreamer, in a corporate world

The rant is over, a bit serious. I'll think of a humorous story next.

Lyrics of the Day: Rise against "Rumors Of My Demise Have Been Greatly Exaggerated"

...So please don't ask me how
I ended up at my wits end and breaking down.
pages torn from books we never read,
cuz we're plugged into this grid.
don't pull this plug right now,
or then we really have to live.

when I die, will they remember not
what I did, but what I haven't done.
it's not the end, that I fear with each breathe.
it's life that scares me to death...

when we built these dreams on sand,
how they all slipped through our hands.
and this might be our only chance.
let's take this one day at a time,
I'll hold your hand if you hold mine.
the time that we kill keeps us alive.

Some Things Just Cannot Be Explained

2005-01-18T09:51:00.000-05:00

Ahh another beautiful day at the lab, well it is not really beautiful out, but I am at the lab. My little entry today is going to cover what started as an innocent day of football watching, and turned into one of the wildest nights known to man. Once again I am exaggerating, but it was crazy.

So it begins......

Sunday at 1pm, AJ's Vikings vs Eagles.... So i arrive to an almost empy Aj's to find Joey and Ben sitting at a primo game table. Now picture it..Joey.. double captain in hand, purple culpeper jersey, purple vikings santa hat, and a viking horn helmet on. Switch to camera B, Ben has a purple jersey, blue skully, and some crazy ass blue scarf(ben likes scarves). So You may ask if I had any intention of turning away and pretending I did not see them? The answer to that is, well no. I sit down catch up for a bit, soon after Steve, Dusko, and eventually Sonia join us, and all i can say to that is....... ohhhh boyeeee. Circa Dusko(2004)

Now the vikings played like shit, and I am not fond of hard sciences, but I am sure that as the Vikes fucked up more, Joey's doubles rolled out expedentially faster. Now we were all drinking minus steve, so I have no intention of picking on Joe, but, he'll be the first to admit...he had a few. And for good reason, Beb owed Joe some money, so Benny picked up joeys first tab...I mean that is like drinking for free is'nt it? So thank god for each other, cause the game was bad, the vikes lost, we shook hands on a good season, and vowed to be back next year......maybe a tear was shed, but lets keep that between us.

By this point, AJ's is well..packed. For some reason the entire Boston Red Sox fan club was frequenting Tally for the day. But we'll get into that in a bit. I am rooting for the Colts, I'm glad I did not bet any money this weekend, thats all i'm saying. Ok so I have to say it, the patriot fans were fucking annoying, as are all bandwagon fans. And in case anyone is unclear to the fact, Troy Brown is the best player to ever play the game of football, or so says drunk guy behind us. By the time we leave, Joey has had 13 doubles, and well we are all talking about going out.

Switch to my apartment: I basically vegitate for an hour or two, them call up Joey. I pick him up and we are off to Poor Pauls.

Poor Pauls:
So the place is pretty empty, and after entering then leaving again for the target copy atm, we find ourselves in the corner booth, for those who know the place, you know only the cool kids sit in the corner booth. Steve rolls in with his always chipper self, and the nice suprise of the night, levetta(sp?) rolls in. To clarify on L, she does not come out with us much, and she pretends to be married, but we know the truth!. Roll-Call: Sam, Steve, Joey, Ben, Levetta, Dom, Sonia, and Willow. And I must say, what a fun crew it was. So per usual we had great conversation, because that is what we do. (Tangent) Actually discussed this phenomenon with Devery last night, we are I suppose an older crowd, and with that being said, our conversations differ greatly from say, the undergrad population. If you do not understand what I am saying, then you will have to come out with us. Back to the story: The group sorta splits for awhile so I can only comment on what happned with Steve, L and I. But we had some great chats about our first times, the strangest place we've had sex, what positions work best for 6'6 asian guys and short girls... as you can tell it was great. Eventually we all regroup by the pool table and continue on with the festivities. It's last call, ok like actually 2, but Ben still somehow gets to order drinks. Weird I know, not like ben has ever talked his way into such a thing before. We choose to leave about 2:40 or so I guess it was.... Next Stop Joey and Bens place (AKA the Swedish Spa)

Royal Oaks:
I cannot exactly remember what happened when Joey and I got there, I just sat on the sofa....the a little later, Steve and Ben break thru the door with two 12 packs of beer, and some story of how they almost died in a gang war trying to get it. Much respect for those two looking out for us like that. There is a seperation for awhile steve,L,and Joey in the kitchen. Leaving Sonia and I on the sofas, i dunno what is being discussed in the kitchen, but Sonia and I had a little chat about girls and how lame they can be at times, this is why we love sonia, she if nothing else is painfully honest about things. And the motions began, Ben comes over and we pop in the big lebowski so we can watch the Jesus scene, and the great idea of playing strip high and low. Yeah so basically we played, and the game of high and low goes by quick when stripping is involved. Ben was first to reach the naked mark, having accomplished this, he ran around the court yard of his complex 3 times. And having woke up the entire place, we thought we were going to be killed by some not soo happy folks. After ben was finished running laps, and pulling some glass out of his foot, the game continued. Now I was doing well by this time Joey and Steve were in boxers only, Sonia was passed out, but not before she lost it all. I still had a bunch on, but then the cheating started, or the deal rather. I had a bunch of clothes still so when i got a good card I would switch with joey and steve. But as all things happen, by the end of the game we were all in the same boat, and it was hilarious. There was a moment of awkwardness, but that left quick once the jokes started rolling.

At 6:30 am we realized we should be going to bed, so that is what happened....thus ending a sunday night in tallahassee.

So as the title says, the night escalated beyond anyone's expectations, and shit just got wild! I do not think it can be pin-pointed to onc moment that occured that night, but if we racked our brains i'm sure we could come up with several factors that affected our outcome.

So yeah, typical night in Tally.........chances of something that wild happening again before the end of the semester...high.....too very high. Cheers

The Yellow Snake Chimes in........

2005-01-10T20:47:00.000-05:00

Hiraga has given me his top 10 list from our weekend in Orlando, ok so it may be a bit of inside humor, but if you take us out.....buy us a drink...... we may let you in on a bit.

Top 10
#10 - LAAAAZ! CHAMINAHHHHHH!
# 9 - Friday night at Churchstreet, because I really don't remember much from it
# 8 -Sam's constant effort to pick a fight with Ben.
# 7 - You got SERVED! That's untold.
# 6 - The ropes conversation at Cricketers. It was untold
# 5 - Sam's hour of incredible drunkeness
# 4 - 2 handles, 2 days, 4 drunken assholes
# 3 - renting out wet n wild for our own personal use for an hour, $14
# 2 - Sam renting out wet n wild for his own personal toilet, priceless
and the
#1 memory from Orlando, sorry Benny, you knew it was coming... Meeting Jay and Angie in the hot tub, they were really nice people..........

The Poor-Mans Entourage is Untold Son.......

2005-01-10T08:26:00.000-05:00

Back in Tully this morning following what could be the wildest weekend bender known to human existence. Ok, well I may be exaggerating a little bit, but it was one hell of a time. I am of course refering to a little road trip to Orlando that me and three of my friends took this past weekend. I'll get into specifics in a second.

Before I begin I have to take a moment to thank the muses of todays post Melanie and Melissa, for without them none of what you are about to read could have happened.

Now I have been called a lot of things in my life, and if its true, I will gladly accept my criticism. That being said, I have never been called a liar. I just had to explain this before starting basically because some folks may not believe that one weekend could be this crazy.

I suppose to fully understand how special Orlando is to our group, I'll have to back-track about a year when a good number of us jumped in our cars to support our boy JJ (WWW.BRINGAFUCKINRAINCOAT.BLOGSPOT.COM) in a fastpitch tournament. This trip was hmmm let us just say crazy. So when we found out that some girls we knew were going to be down there running in the Disney marathon, there was no hesitation to plan a follow up road-trip. So now that you are caught up with where all this is coming from, we'll begin our tale...........

So about 3 or so friday afternoon, I make my way over to Steve place, as his place was deemed the rally point for operation overtake Orlando. Steve and I chill for a bit, I get my ass handed to me in NCAA and we get the call Joey amd Ben have arrived. Now to get to Orlando you must travel through redneck nation aka any part of Florida that is not a big city. So when Ben shows up in some wild sunglasses, a Spa robe, and white and hot pink bath slippers...I'm not shocked, just a bit worried for his sweet virgin ass. We put our bags in the trunk, hopped in The Element, and we are on our sweet way.........

Ever wonder what Santa Clause does on the off-season? Take a guess. We knew that our trip was going to be special when we passed a hearse on I-10 being driven by none other than the man from the north pole. It took teamwork, a bit of bad driving etiquette, and a bunch of angry drivers, but we did get a picture of santa driving his other sleigh. Like I said "Teamwork". The rest of the ride down consisted of good music and good conversation. And for the record, fuck mapquest, not because their directions were wrong, but because they were too detailed and I heard about it the whole weekend, thanks a lot dicks. So what if you can physically see the hotel up ahead, there is still a chance the streets can get tricky, ok probably not, but I have to defend myself, now don't I?

Ahh so we roll in to O town around 9pm, get our hotel squared away, and priorities set in. I'm on ice patrol, joey and steve hit up the ABC for captain and coke, and ben...well now I think about it his ass did'nt do anything. So by 9:30 we do what we do and end up in the hot tub with a dixie cup full of the goodness. We chat per usual, and end up conversing with a lovely couple from England Jay and Ang. We soon become dry and draw sticks to see who has to go get the captain from the room, our asian accessory loses, then he disappears, but I am not kidding shows up 2.5 seconds later, we still have no idea how he did it. Right about then the conversation takes a turn for the worse, I won't go into it, for obvious reason, but we came away un-scaved. But wow was it bad. Time check 11:15, a 1.75 was gone between the 4 of us, and we were beginning to prune, so we decided it was actually time to go out on the town. Next Stop Church street.......

We pile into a taxi, can't remember the ride much, the driver was cool though. I just remember being facinated with the fact he had this GPS stuff that told him where people were waiting, he was on top of his taxiing shit! So we are meeting some girls out on church street that Joey and Ben knew. I had no idea what to expect, not like I would have cared at that point. When we finally get there, we all pile out and Steve is pancaked by a smallish asian girl trying to get to ben. It was insane, she went through the line Jerome Bettis style, I think steve broke something, but it healed by the end of he night. After this i remember paying 5 dollars to get in, elevators, some couches,taking shameless pictures, and well that is about it. At some point, somehow we get into another taxi which takes us to denny's...... I won't bore you with our late night snack, but i will say our waitress was a temptress, mini-burgers are the shit, steve has a love hate relationship with moons over my hammy, and we were left with some girls vomiting in the parking lot.

The walk back to the hotel involved joey climbing a tree, and me almost getting arrested for wanting to play in a portion of a waterslide. "hey...HEY...keep walking". Passing out insued.

Sat AM started with a dip in the hot tub, and the most delicious orange juice we have ever had, and due to vasodialation, we were feeling great! Next Stop the Cricketers Arms English Pub.

The Cricketers Arms is an English pub located off international drive, and it has never failed to entertain the likes of us. We go hoping to watch Everton play in the FA cup, but the TV is confucked so instead of leaving we buy a second round, and we start talking about "the ropes". If you know what "the ropes" is, god bless you, if not, ask one of us, we may tell. We decide to form a rope boys club when we get back to Tally staring Steve the Tsunami, Sam the Fireman, Ben as Niagra, and Joey as the Wonderfall. And we are currently taking bets on who will hit the ceiling first. As is every day in Orlando, the weather was pristine, so we move ourselves outside to a nice table in the sun. We stay there for rounds 3-?? mind you this all started at noon. We at this point are literally in tears laughing our asses off when LAZ roles up, this big eared freak of a man, we thought he was going to ask us to quiet down...ends up his profession is setting power rankings for football, needless to say we all had a good chat. I think he fell in love with steve, but you'd have to ask him about that. We end up bailing out on Laz, cause he was a talker.....next stop wet and wild.

Some folks do no believe in omens, and fate, but that fact that wet and wild was built directly across from our hotel had to be some sort of magic. We decide to go there while at the pub, because how much fun would a water park be when you have been drinking? The answer is lots. On the way back to the hotel we have to stop at the ABC for another 1.75 of captain, more coke, and a cooler...not a fucking polystyreme. Steve finds the cooler and congratulates the cashier with a big high five....meanwhile we lose joey. We can only assume he went looking for a bathroom, and eventually we find him jogging down international drive...we pick him up and head to the hotel.

We get back around 4, and we have to make a huge decision, the park closes at 5, is an hour enough time?? Of course it is, we also decide we need to bring stuff into the park to drink. So we all mix a drink then replace the coke with captain in the 2 liter, we are intellectual giants!!. Ben did what he does best, and talked the gate people to let us all in for uber cheap being the park is only going to be open for 1 hour. And I tell you what...we owned that shit. We were like kings, and did not have to wait for anything, therefore we made the best out of one hour. There are some more great stories from within the park that will have to be told in person, they are just too extreme for this page. At 5 we are kicked out like everyone else, and make our way back to the hot tub.....and guess who is there..Jay and Ang. This is where the other boys have to fill you in because i was close too losing it and ending in the hospital, all i do remember is trying to convince jay to watch napoleon dynamite as soon as he could. I also text messaaged everyone who lives on the east coast. Apologies are out to, but not limited too megan,allison,kristen,melissa,ang,megan,and stef. After several of hours in the hot tub we are left with a second empty 1.75 of captain and feeling hungry. Chinese food is next.

On the way to the chinese place i'm about to break an abandoned drive thru menu thingymabob when steve stops me, i make some comment about how cops don't just fall from trees...moments later an orlando po po drives by..thanks steve. I need to stop doing that shit. Dinner was delicious, and somehow we got on the topic of me being a player with the girls, of course i almost shit myself knowing i have no skills, but it lead to funny shit later. Joey writes a song about me, and for the rest of the night as we were walking about I had my own personal band(joey) following me around singing. I thought it was funny. We called it a night after that, being we had to get up to watch the marathon, or so we thought, the next day.

Now the purpose of the weekend was to watch murry and weiner run the marathon, so we left the hotel in plaenty of time, we thought, to catch the finish in the Epcot parking lot. All i have to say is fuck Epcot! It takes forever to get to the sign that says you are 8 miles from the Epcot entrance, and we are parked in the worlds largest parking lot of a highway. We are certain that we were sitting in this monstrosity while both our girls were crossing the finish line. Fuck traffic, making us look like dicks. We have all given our apologies to the girls we just hope they accept them. All that is left of the story is the drive home, which was uneventful, besides front seat karaoke with sam and steve.

So that ends the saga of Orlando take 2, was it worth it..yes, did everyone who did not go lose out....yes, did ben and I reach new lows in our lives...yes, are we going to do it again...yes, Jan 29th Keane at the House of Blues. Oh Boyeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. This story is so untold it's sick, I mean you can't force a story like this, all the same Orlando got SERVED!

Almost Forgot the Lyrics of the Trip: Hmmm ok
"The Park" By Slapstick

I remember sitting in the sandbox
And I realized it was how life's supposed to be
when I look back and see
So beautiful to me, so beautiful
Holding hands and painting pictures
Playgrounds and friends were the only necessities
when I look back and see
So beautiful to me,so beautiful
It's time to start being kids again
Where hopes are strong, where eyes are bright
To erase the prejudice, to no walls put up inside of life
I don't see why it's so hard to get along these days
It didn't seem that hard when we were kids
I wanna be a kid again, I want to play in the park
when I look back and see
So beautiful to me, so beautiful

2005-01-09T22:48:00.000-05:00

Josh, I may not be able to reach you all the way over there in New Zealand, however, I can still hurt you with my thoughts........ Hurry home son.
P.S. When did you turn into Carl Sandberg??

Johnny Paycheck Eat Your Heart Out

2005-01-04T09:59:00.000-05:00

So now that I am back in the Sunshine State, I am going to take a moment and summarize my winter break. To help make the story more interesting, i'll be comparing it to a country song. I know I have no idea about modern country music, but I am an avid fan of the old stuff, shocking I know. And in old i mean 50's through early 90's prob. To help you understand why, I need to explain Romney, WV. Romney West Virginia is where my parents have built a new house. A monster of a house that will only be occupied by Mom and Pops, why they built it, I have no idea, but I suppose it is none of my buisness anyways. There is nothing in Romney, except an abandoned Coca Cola plant, a stop light, an italian place called mario's. and the West Virginia School for the Deaf and the Blind. Now the greatest thing about the school, is that is broadcasts classic country 24 hours a day from an internal radio station. So this means when I am in Romney I learn the recipe that goes into country music.

3 parts Cheating
1 part forgiving
2 parts death
9 parts alcohol
2 parts the girl/guy they left behind
1 part hard laboring work
___________________________
= A Great Country Song!!!

That being said, I'll go into how my break paralleled a well written country song.

Hard Labor:
So I get to woodbridge on a monday and basically crash immediately, after the 12 hours straight thru drive i put in. Ok so I did not immediately crash, I did meet my boy Joey at Hardtimes for some Chili-Mac and a Weissenbock...yum. So I for sure crash after getting home from that. 8:30 the next day comes early, it is my dad knocking on my door asking if I wanna go to IHOP...of course I wanna go, like he needs to ask. As I am waking up, I remember that my dad has a contract out on me.....due to unexpected costs last semester, I found myself flat broke until I could get some X-mas mone, the fact that I had no money is also indirectly linked to a good country song, that is why hard labor pops up so much....that meant I had to go to work. Work this break consisited of me driving 2.5 hours, and painting the inside of my folks new house. Once again I was recruited to a rask where I have no talent. I keep telling everyone that I'm only talented in music, but that does not really help in the real world. So I drive the drive and my dad sets me up with a brush and some paint and lets me goooooooo. I have painted before. so I have the basics down, cut in around floorboards, ceilings, corners, windows etc... then roll to your hearts content. So I start. I cut in one time and I ask my dad to check on my progress, he comes in...looks around..is quiet.. and says,"Looks good....but let me show you a better way of doing it." That is better translated as"how did we raise such a fuck-up". Of course my dad words it much nicer, he'd never complain, it's just the way he is. I do it his way afterwards and a day and a half later my mom has raspberry sorbet walls and cream trim, and thanks to dad touching it up, it looks good ;) I did however make enough money too float through till x-mas.

Death:
My family has had a lot of animals, mostly dogs over the years, with the occasional rabbit, guinea pig, hermit crab, and fish. Now I love animals, but as so perfectly quoted by Alfred Ferguson (I took Poetry at WVU) "Nothing Gold Can Stay." My dad has always been the one responsible for burying any pets that pass, it is sorta weird now I think about it, because he would bury them immediately and then tell you when he was finished that they died. I suppose he was trying to protect us when we were young. One day the dog would be there, the next it would be gone, and then only spoken about. I can't tell you how many dogs we have had, but I am sure in the future when the developers turn the soil aound our old house, they will think we were some sorta satanist sacrificing animals, from all the bones they'll turn up. So now to break... I get home and we have two dogs at the house a 155lb rottweiler who thinks she's a lap dog, bessie is like 6 years old, and there is Jack, a 11 year old boxer, who was not looking so good. I had this feeling that Jack would not make it through the break, and I was right. We brought them both up to Romney while painting, and on the second morning, we found that Jack passed in his sleep. I knew it right away because my dad went into the garage to take them out and 20 seconds later i heard the door open again.... blah. So how this is how we started our morning. We had no shovel only a hoe, so we had to go to town and buy that. The ground was frozen so that was no fun, and it was cold as hell, but it has always been my experience that it is always a little colder at funerals. My dad broke up the dirt with the hoe, and I cleared the dirt out with a shovel, an hour later,and not a word spokenbetween me and my dad, Jack had a proper grave. It got me thinking about my feelings I suppose, but thats a different story. I should have known it was just forshadowing of what a shitty break I was to have.

Alcohol:
So I did not drink a lot while I was home. Reason being, most of the time I volunteered to be the DD, or I found myself having to take care of other drunk folks. However...Christmas Eve was the exception, and I'm sure I made an ass of myself. But it's not like I cared then or now..... It has been tradition for the past 3 or 4 years now, that my friend Matt has people to his house on Christmas Eve. The number of us who make it dwindles a bit every year, but we still keep the tradition alive. This year it was the usual crew, matt,megan,casby,john,joe,bailey, and me. I'll post pictures when my mom e mails those shits too me. Over Matt's moms awesome appetizers and vegetable tray we all proceed to get our drink on and talk about old times and things that are going on with everyone, the usual catch up. Problem this year was....my families christmas party was at 1am Christmas morning, since my dad had to work on x mas day, and he got home at 1am. So I'm at Matt's and I look at my watch and it is like 12:45....good lord I have to go face my family in an altered state T-minus 15 minutes. So I make it home and my sis is pulling in at the same time, i have her check my breath, so I breathe out and she precedes to vaporize, bad sign. I run in, wave hello, and hit the listerine bottle, good to go now. So I walk in say hello to everyone, and was feeling great. I was cheery, talkative the whole ball of wax. Then Jamie rolls in, with a bottle of the vino....suppose i could trace my disgrace back to that moment. Ok so I start getting a bit loud, and expressing myself freely, which may be considered by a few to be ok in say a bar or football game, but fewer would agree one should talk like that at a Christmas party. I commented on other peoples gifts, STD's, people I did'nt like, and a bunch of other stuff. The kicker I suppose is when my mom got a Monopoly game, and I went through the entire Dane Cook Skit about his grandma cheating him at Monopoly, my mom was not too happy, but I still don't care. Hopefully this will be my last Christmas with my parents so I am kinda proud I went out with a bang.

The Girl that I left behind:
Ok so there was no girl that I left behind in Woodbridge when I went away, so I'll have to stretch your imaginaton on this one. I did however meet up with a girl I had not seen in 6 years, who I was madly in love with in high school. I won't mention any names, but if you know me, then you know the story. If not ask about it and I may fill you in. We met up the day after Christmas, she came over with her soon to be husband and we just hung out. I came to the conclusion that I was really young in high school, and though she is still awesome, we would have never worked out. It kinda made me feel better about things, at least my heart was not broken by "the one".

Forgiveness:
The forgiveness aspect of my break directly links with the girl i left behind portion. There was a lot of tension between a friend of mine, because he was the one the girl formentioned was in love with. She was head over tails in love, but he ended up dicking her over. And I had a problem with him being better friends with her than me, as well as the fact that he treated her bad. We did not talk about all this over break, but we hung out, and i think we are cool with each other. Now we have always been cool, but there was always that little bit of tension in the air when we were around each other. And the ironic thing was it was her who started the whole thing, because at some point in the past she actually told him that i did not like him. Helped me out a lot ya know? So I forgave him for anything that happened in the past, and now i am older and less blind, and maybe both of us were too good for her, ya never know.

Cheating:
Ok, some cheating occured.........no, it did not involve anything I did over break. It's a face to face story, so we'll leave it at that.

I guess that about sums up Sam's "country" Winter break. I guess from a positive view, next years gotta be better than the last.

Song Of the Moment: Nose Over Tail, Alkaline Trio

Crack my head open on your kitchen floor
To prove to you that I have brains
Meanwhile tin men are led by little girls
Down golden roads that lead to nowhere

Fine time to fake a seizure
Feel your mouth on mine, you're saving me

Whatever happened to that silly dream you had?
I want to make it real
I'd love to rub your back
Like a plane crash that never hits the ground
I fall in love with you
I'm nose over tail for you
Your voice like the sound of sirens to a house on fire
You're saving me

To All The Girls I've Loved Before....Sorta

2004-12-24T11:47:00.000-05:00

So it is Christmas Eve, I'm out at another internet cafe, basically waiting around to watch the Vikings game in a few hours. Things here are as boring as usual, tonight has potential though...the Richmond crew is heading up, so that may be a debacle....If it is good I'll for sure write about it.

Being a highly reflective time of year, I've spent some time thinking about past relationships and past "crushes" with the latter being much more numerous. This will be the first holidays in a good while where I will be alone. And I know I have friends and family, but when it comes down to it I still have to sleep alone at night, and spoon with whatever is laying on the bed (pillow,blanket,etc...) So I figure I'd lighten the mood by recalling some of the more interesting crushes I 've had.

The first interesting crush that I had was in elemetary school, I know ths sounds early, but I may have an answer to that. "Experts" suggest telling children about sex as early as the parent feels the child can understand it. I was blessed with an engineer for a dad, who blushes at sex scenes in movies, and a mother who is an OB/GYN nurse, who disusses STD's at the dinner table without a hesitation. So needless to say, I knew a lot early. Now I was not roaming about elementary school looking to have sex or anything like that but I for sure understood boys and girls were different. Ok so we'll call her C to hide her identity, since she is well known amongst my Woodbridge friends. I think it was somewhere around 3rd or 4th grade when I first noticed her. She was beautiful, and still is....should have been my first sign I suppose. She was one of the smart girls who I am assuming never has been sent to the principals office a day in her life, and not that I was a "problem" child at school...but I spent some time conversing with officials in my day. My long distance infatuation went on for a good while. And when I did get opportunities to talk with her, I did the usual, and made a complete ass out of myself. But I guess that is my MO. That combined with being super shy, even to this day, things did not progress as I would have liked. So fith grade rolls around and the geat seperation is upon us. Based on where one lived, determined what middle school you went too. So I had a brilliant idea!! I would write her a heartfelt love letter letting her know how I felt and all that jazz, and slip it in her bookbag, then sometime in the future she'd find it, and I would be gone forever.... So I write the letter and fold it up, take it to school, and like 5 minutes before the final bell i decide to make my move. everyone is around signing books, and our bookbags are lined up along the wall, so not so stealthy i sneek off........and the teacher catches me. But all she sees is me unzipping a pocket, so she assumes I'm trying to steal something from her!!!! So I get hit by the two sided sword, C thinks 1) I'm an ass and a thief and 2) C never gets the letter. It may have been a blessing, because we ended up in the high school, but who knows what would have happened if the teacher was'nt snooping about........... I still see C from time to time when I'm home and she is still hot, and still a bit out of my league, but it always reminds me of the story I just told.

Ahhh memories, sadly enough I have not really changed much. I'm still shy, still have no clue when a girl is interested, and I'm still an ass. I've had a lot of similar experiences throughout life, and I suppose I'll throw some more up here eventually when I feel like it.

Hmmm a song of the day may be tough lets see what pops in the head:
Alkaline Trio: "Private Eye"

New Year's Eve was as boring as heaven
I watched flies fuck on channel 11
There was no one to kiss, there was nothing to drink
Except some old rotten milk someone left in the sink
And there's no ring on the phone anymore
There's no reason to call I passed out on the floor
Smoked myself stupid and drank my insides raisin dry

But at the right place at the right time
I'll be dead wrong and you'll be just fine
And I won't have to quit doing fucked up shit
For anyone but me

What Do They Pave the Galleria With???

2004-12-23T13:20:00.000-05:00

Back at the good ol' panera and their free wi-fi cafe, I will never know for sure, but this place may have saved my life over this arduous break.

So i got a text at like 8:15 am yesterday from my girl megan. She is currently employed at a small law firm located up in Georgetown, and obviously has to be at work before i usually wake up. We were supposed to go for some Thai food up in Reston yesterday evening, but she needed to get some shopping so I agreed to meet her when she got off work up at Tysons Corner. I went back to bed........... About 5:45 in the PM get a call to head on up. Now Tysons is maybe 30 miles from Woodbridge and it took me a grand total of 1 hour and 45 minutes to get there. Have I ever told you how much I love traffic in DC???? ;)

A word on Tysons Corner....
Tysons is another suburb of DC, that started out as a small farm, and has assploded into a huge commercial clusterfuck of sub-skyscrapers and technology buisnesses. And Tysons Corner mall is the caste system personified in a shopping structure. On one side of International drive you have Tysons I, which is the everyday man's mall....nice stores, a rainforest cafe, food court etc... And across the street.....Tysons II: The Galleria!!! The Galleria consists of any store you can name where you are looking at a minimum bill of around $500 just for walking into the store. And of course ths is where Megan wanted to go. So I'm rocking some jeans a button up shirt and some Pumas....I know I know its shocking, me dressed like that. But I suppose I got minimal stares, not like I cared. As I walked around, I realized that I was in a weird twilight zone for me, it was as if "The Simple Life" was having a casting call! Girls were dressed to the nines, like they were at the club...and upon further inspection, so were the guys. Now I ask, is this really necessary?? I do not have an answer I suppose, it may be necessary in this uber caste. Too me it was just silly, but I would be a liar if I said I did not enjoy the scenery, some of the girls were HOT, and then others were the tradgically rich and ugly.....what a pity. So yeah, i get there after driving 1 hour and 45 minutes and.......we stay for about 10 minutes!! Awesome I say! Next stop...Arlington!

Megan and I break out of the galleria and proceed to get lost for around an hour, I'm following Megan at this point, it takes a lot to get me mad....so I never got mad, just tired. We end up at a girls house up off Glebe Rd, for those familiar. Glebe road is gentrification city, if you don't know , look it up. Anywhoo it turns into a wildUVA party, now that translates to beer pong, flip cup, and chess. Oh yeah, it was out of control. Most of the kids were undergrads, and I had a moment of clarity, that I was the old creepy guy hanging around the college party.....when does that happen. You all know the old creepy guy, kinda creepin around the keg not really conversing with anyone, but he is always there. Wow did I feel old! I mean I'm only 24 but for fucks sake....these kids graduated high school as I was starting grad school...... It's a sad day in Mudville ladies and gentleman. I guess it did not help, that Megan and I were rocking a bottle of the Red Vino, and the kiddies were sporting Beast Light, but I AM too old for that nastiness. And just when I thought it could'nt get any weirder, it turned into Vh1 jams channel, plus dancing in the middle of the living room........this continued for awhile.... Then we called it a night about 1ish... Being the good guy I am, i followed her home to make sure she got there ok, and I went to bed.

I guess there is no moral or anything, just a story today. The muse today would have to be all those high school girls who drive Range Rovers, is it really necessary in the concrete jungle of NOVA??

Lyrics: Pulley; "Outside Opinion"

if you need an explanation then you'll never understand.
this music's just a part of me
grew up with the outside opinion,
an outcast of the inside dominion
lived my whole life against the grain.
it always seemed i was one foot out of step.
never do anything that anyone would accept.
if that's someone's fault, i'll take the blame.

A High School Reunion on Crack

2004-12-22T14:17:00.000-05:00

Ok, so it may come as a big suprise to some....but I did not get along well with many of those I went to high school with. And looking back I suppose i could have tried harder, but at the same time I still do not believe most of the kids were worth the effort. Suppose I will give you a run down of my high school, give you a glance of what I saw.

Gar-Field Senior High School, home of 2,800 hundred suburbanite kiddies all trying to get an education, ok so maybe a few of those are REALLY trying to learn. There were a few little subgroups, the typical of course the jocks, the rockers, the preps,the thespians,the band kids,etc.. but GF had a few groups exclusive to the area being branches of street gangs from DC and every pregnant teenage girl in the county. You may think I am joking, but seriously our school had a special program for pregnant girls, they bussed them in from all over the county. So of course when looking at statistics, we were considered a promiscuous school. The "campus" was surrounded by fences, gates were locked in the day so no one could enter or leave without going through a police check, and the kicker....the building had no windows. Oh yes.. it was as lovely as it sounded.

Sam was friends with all, some more than others I suppose, but when it all boiled down there were about 15-20 kids I would call a friend out of the 2,800 I had to choose from, it is sad I know, and you can call me a lot of things but you can never say I used people for company.

So in an round about way, that brings us to TGIFridays, and the fun that abounds whenever I visit Woodbridge. I always dread going there, but it always happens, mostly out of boredom, but there are small bits of comedy and curiosity that also draw me in. Now holidays are the best time for this reunion I speak of, mainly because TGIFridays is open on major holidays, so after 8 hours with the family on Christmas, everyone is ready for a drink, I'm sure you would agree. So I walk in, and immediately there at least ten people I could have gone my entire life without ever seeing again, and would have been quite contempt. And as I start to mingle, I realize that all of my high school has the same idea as me, and the fun begins. In this corner I see the high school's most wanted cheerleader, looking like she just got arrested on COPS with ten pounds of makeup, and a haggard 35 year old date....what happened to this poor girl. In this corner...we find the cute high school couple...oh they are still together, but it seemes that they seem more like best friends, they devote all there time this night trying to stay away from each other. And then the unspeakable happens, people who would not give me the time of day try to start up a conversation with me. Now how am I supposed to treat this? Should I go along acting like they were never a dick to me in HS, or should I just go along like nothing happens. Well being nice and all, I usually go along with it. And the conversation is never good, and I try to get away as soon as I can. I can pick up when someone is talking to say something, or when people talk to be making noise, and it is usually white noise. "How have you been" "uh huh uh huh, thats great" sounds exciting to me....definitely a boo. It is such a sad sight, it is hard to describe, and i mean I am not saying that I am better in any way than most of these folks, but at least I got out of this town,and am working to better myself. It may be going slow, but it is good to know that I owe the government money. Owing Uncle Sam some cash makes me feel better than having spent 30,000 to pimp out my civic that is now worth in the range of 8,000 dollars. These people are fucking ridiculous! I have to say that some are in the same boat as me, and it may be a coincidence, but these are the folks I actually have decent conversations with. And as bad as this scene is, it is at the same time like a car accident....I have to go back everttime I go home. I cannot explain it, I talk this trash, and know what to expect, and I always make my way back there. Like I said though it does provide me with some comic relief in this waste-land called Woodbridge. Ahh I can't wait for Christmas night!!!

Muse of the day goes to Emily (Melbe's girl) I only hung out with her for a day, but we had a good talk.

Appropriate Lyrics: Less Than Jake, History of a Boring Town

Just talked to this girl,used to live, yea, on my street.
After all these years you're here, and its still just you and me.
Sometimes I can't believe after all these years I just think I'll never leave here.
She said it's so funny,how life runs out so fast. Let's take another drink, and here's to the past.

That same old crowd, that drags me down.
Another day in a boring town. That same old crowd, that brings me down.
A boring life in a boring town.

And remember when they looked through you, and then looked past me
We were the ones they said would always leave.
So when you go, just think of me, think of me.

Either you're too mean, or you're too nice

2004-12-12T04:19:00.000-05:00

So today was supposed to be traveling day, but due to the Leon Pub and a great conversation, looks like I'll be heading out tommorrow. I went to the pub with the "supernova", I'm sure he would not mind his name up on this bitch, but names are'nt that important when it comes down to it. Now, when it all boils down, I have never had a bad night at Leon which may seem amazing to some since I frequent the place alot, but it makes logical sense when I explain why I go. Of course the good beer is a big draw, but good conversation trumps the beer anyday. Basically, how it all works is that when I go to the pub I choose my company. Probably sounds snobish to some, and I suppose it is. But why go to a place with hollow people. You can't go through life associating with people who are going to impede on growth, and it blows my mind that there are people out there who are just fine with that lifestyle. But that is why I am me I suppose. So the moral of this intro is, if i ask you to go to the pub, you are obviously thought of highly by me. And I'll let you interpret that however you would like. I'm not naive enough to think everyone would be flattered. Ok so now I'll cover some realizations of my night out.

1) I'm not obsessed with dark things, I'm just more aware than some folks.
2) Never try to go story for story with supernova, it's futile.....
3) I'll never understand girls(refer to entry title)...weird huh?
4) Cambodia was some fucked up shit....
5) Hear everything, but only listen to people you feel are important....everyone has an opinion I suppose
6) An edgy girl with bobbed hair will be the end of me, jesus god.
7) Human beings will never cease to amaze
8) Dads are great
9) Spoiled girls fall the hardest
10) "Brand New Colony" describes me to a T

So this has turned out to be a serious entry, it happens I suppose. Of course I have left all the good stuff we talked about out of the public eye...could'nt steal money from the wishing well (goonies reference). So the moral is if you want to hear the full stories, you have to come out and we'll talk it up for a few. Special thanks to supernova for this one.(muse of the day)

Since music is my M.O. I'm putting some lyrics in every post that I think of as meaningful.

"I'll be the platform shoes and undo what heredity's done to you...You won't have to strain to look into my eyes

I'll be your winter coat buttoned and zippedstraight to the throat With the collar up so you won't catch a cold

I want to take you far from the cynics in this town

And kiss you on the mouth We'll cut our bodies free from the tethers of this scene, Start a brand new colony Where everything will change,We'll give ourselves new names (identities erased) The sun will heat the grounds Under our bare feet in this brand new colony" Brand New Colony-The Postal Service

2004-12-09T09:07:00.000-05:00

There was a stripper, but I was more excited about these glasses

Ever Wonder how a Diesel Locomotive works?

2004-12-08T10:16:00.000-05:00

Before I start i have to acknowledge my muse of the day, Allison. She informed me of this place, so she gets my respect.

Ok, so I'm new at this shit, and am having a hard time finding a place to start, so forgive a first attempt.

With winter break coming up pretty quick, I have a lot of things that I am looking forward too. Well, ok... that is a bit of a lie, I have a few things that I will be looking forward too. Mainly spending time with the sparse amount of friends i still have in Virginia. These lost souls never found their way out of the place often refered to as "Dale Shitty" "Hoodbridge" or the "Black Hole". Namely, Woodbridge, Virginia. Yeah, I know what you are thinking, and it is as exciting as it sounds. *Shiver* enough about that place for now. What I can always count on when I do go home is my dad putting my ass to work.

A brief introduction to dad, whom also responds to Mr. P, Big Sam, Pops, Dude, and Dad. My dad started working at IBM in the early 80's, his plant has been bought by Loral, and most recently Lockheed Martin. He is an engineer of some sort, and this is the basis of who he is as a person. He is a great guy, do not get me wrong, just a bit on the slow side when it comes to interacting with others. He has gotten better with people as of lately, but fuck if a stranger is going to get 10 words out of him. Pops does not talk much, but... when he does it is like the voice of god or some shit. There is silence for miles around, and the most prolific thing ever heard comes out of his mouth. The best part is it is usually so funny, I literally fall out of the chair laughing. But that is the magic behind him i suppose, I respect a person who does not talk just to be talking. My mom does that shit, and i cannot stand it. Ok so now you have a miniscule look at pops i'll get back to break.

So my dad works 40 some hours a week at lockheed martin, and then he comes home and runs an air-conditioning company. Not because he is trying to put food on the table, but because he loves to work, crazy fucker. But this side buisness puts money in my pockets as well, as I work for him while I am home. It is not glamorous work, the air conditioning buisness, in fact it is down right shitty. The buisiest times of the year are summer and winter, and because we are fixing peoples shit, it means we are exposed to the elements. Oh yeah, you probably don't think about that one. In the summer we are FIXING the a/c aka sweating our asses off with no air, and freezing our asses off in the winter. Like I said glamourous. And I know my dad humors me by letting me work, because when it comes to tools and such i am fuck all useless. My biggest job is cutting slips and drives. To best explain these i'll refer to sex, the slip is the vagina and the drive is the penis. These when combined hold the ducts together, look at a duct nect time you see one and pay attention to the joints, those are slips and drives. But i have to say i'm the fucking slips and drives master, at least for a few hours, then my arms get tired, my hands start hurting, and then I'm useless. I always imagine myself coming back to school looking like a fiddler crab, having only used one arm the whole break. So that is my physical job, my real job is to keep my dad company. This is where the fun starts, and the informative conversations. So do you know how a diesel locomotive works?? probably runs on diesel right.....half right half wrong. The diesel turns huge magnets which creates electricity, and this electricity runs the trains electric engine.....not unlike hybrid cars. Cool shit I know, and this is what we talk about. In reality it is just useless information, and some would say I have enough of it as it is, but I don't really mind, i makes pops happy, and i can see it in his face he is proud to be passing on such great knowledge, along with his peanut on a railroad track song(i'll put that at the end). So I guess my trips home provide me with that gay father son bonding nonsense you see in the movies, but fuck all that throwing a football around or going to strip bars together, I am fine with a dewalt hammer drill, the constant threat of tetanus, facts on the engineering marvels of the world, and freezing my ass off. My stories get funnier, stick with my ass.

Poperisms
weather report "light followed by darkness"

"there once was a peanut sitting on a railroad track, his heart was all a flutter, along came a choo choo train, and now he is peanut butter"